In Ohio Mike Wood got sick of motorists speeding doon his street so instead of climbing onto a roof and taking pot-shots at windscreens with a rifle as Yanks are so keen to do he made full size cardboard cutouts of children and placed them at the roadside.
Drivers got scared seeing a little child so close to the road in case they threw a ball or something damaging their cars and slowed doon.
Drivers got scared seeing a little child so close to the road in case they threw a ball or something damaging their cars and slowed doon.
Being America several people did stop to try to lure the children into the vehicles but drove away angry when the sexy little children turned out to be fakes.
Now Mr Wood is getting phone calls from police departments and neighbourhood watch associations all over the US.
What a fucking brilliant idea it reminds me of the film 'Police Academy' when the guy puts a Dirty Harry cutout in his shop before he locks up and goes home, he also has a policeman cutout pointing a radar gun.
In New Zealand they have cutouts of the back of police cars sitting by the road.
The idea has backfired in London though. The guards at Buckingham Palace were replaced by cutouts due to a lack of soldiers because of the war of terror, this was soon noticed by Japanese tourists who wanted to pose with them for photos and the palace was swarming with nips.
I want an Old Knudsen cutout for some court dates I have coming up and maybe for alibis when I commit some more of my hate crimes, now is a Synagogue and a Mosque the same thing? both Al Qaeda right?
In the future if you are a victim of a crime or witness one and go running up to a police officer only to be ignored its not a cardboard cutout, the police just don't want to get involved.
10 comments:
I want an Old Knudsen cut out.
I have a closet full of Old Knudsen life-sized, cardboard cut-outs. I bring them out at night for tea parties.
I used to have a cut-out of Johnny Depp until the Knudsen cut-outs came along. Johnny? Knudsen's hotness surpasses your hotness. You ain't all that next to Knudsen. We can no longer be lovers. Don't take it personally. Go back to France.
One of the Knudsen cut-outs is in my bed. Last night he gave me a nasty paper cut. I still can't sit down because of it.
I married a 2 dimensional man but thats something totally different I guess.
mmmmmmm your tag is gonna get you some dirty little people here by accident.....
Cut-out soldiers, what a brilliant idea. Those brass hat types will be chuffed to Naafi breaks.
marky I don't want to know what for.
MJ Yer love of me is cruel and unusual.
ellie was he a bit stiff?
manuel thats how I got you.
perry neeham they have cutout soldiers for target practice so why not have them doing the shooting too?
As a secular man raised in "New England," I find church bells to be charming. However, I'll be damned if someone's going to call me to prayer five times a day. Jesus H. Christ On A Stick!
You could put the Old Knudsen cutout in the bed of the newly weds, she wouldn't know the difference for all the action she will get.
Although she does look a tad frisky.
Why doesn't he just get a bunch of foster children and make them stand close to the road?
It would be easier than making a cut-out, and if he only fed them once a day, it could be quite profitable.
I haff taken idea to next level and haff oldknudsen cutout stuck to front door. Not getting any doubles glazink adverts in post anymore...
PS Ellie definately NOT two dimensional, almost four dimensional hotness...
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