Yer at the end of the line, whats the fucking point of going on? yer wife has run off with another woman and won't let you watch them having sex, the dog was happy to go with her (that wee traitorous fucker) you have a flesh eating rash on yer penis, you've lost yer job as a brain surgeon because after you lost that last patient they ran a check on you and found you never went to medical school and to top it all off yer football team lost 5 - nil . Jumping off the bridge seems the most easy way out.
Wait, crisis counseling, I'll talk to someone, what do you mean "out of order?" I'm no using my minutes up on my mobile phone, away and fuck I'm jumpin, its probably a recording anyway.
Friday, 16 November 2007
Is This A Sign From God?
oldknudsen@gmail.com Old Knudsen
Labels: bronzy, crisis counseling, irony
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16 comments:
By the bridge in Athlone there is a Samaritans sign that suggests people 'call this number'. The telephone number is out of date.
Our bridges have extra guardrails and cameras, so if a jumper starts to climb, the bridge patrol gets there pretty quickly. No out of order phone lines though.
connan drumm that is class, my kind of humour alright, if only there was a camera to catch their faces before they jumped.
witchypoo in the UK its not against the law to kill yerself, if yer going to do it you'll do it, no silly law or patrol will stop you.
I was looking through the front pages of the phone book once and saw a crisis line for Teens contemplating suicide. So I called to find out how the deal with youngin's in such a state. And yes, they offer them a recording..blah..blah...blah...if you weren't going to follow through with it, maybe this recording will give you the push over the edge you need. Pathetic!
_p
haaaaaaahaha! That's funny. They may as well offer them cement boots too.
It'd have to be 6-nil before I'd jump.
'a flesh eating rash on the penis' may explain the wife running off with another woman. that sort of thing puts a lady off.
i walked by that sign on the Golden Gate Bridge not long ago. I wasn't going to jump but i almost got knocked over the railing by the bicyclists flying by at 40mph.
They made a documentary called "The Bridge" where they show all the jumpers doing the swan dive off the Golden Gate Bridge...one of my favorite films. Now if only someone would make one about those cunting cyclists being shoved over the railing.
proxima maybe they got sick of the teens tutting and talking back.
steph a perfect example of how touchy feely goes wrong.
sam problem-child-bride you have nerves of steel,a penalty shoot out is far worse than any slasher film.
marky why is it called the golden gate bridge when its orange? as for my rash weemen are so picky.
Xul I saw "A bridge too far" nothing to do with the golden gate I was just bonding.
Yes, I'd be in the Eastwood camp "if you're goin' to jump, jump!
If you're goin' to talk, talk"
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Knudsen, how do you know all that stuff about me. Jesus, and now you've gone and told everyone. I'll never forgive you.
I doin' it this time, don't try to stop me, no it's no good. Hang on I think I'll have a last cup of tea and toast.
PS: Anyway, it's not a flesh eating disease on my penis, it's only psoriasis.
OK- half of is missing due to too much steroid cream, but how was I to know you should only use it for a short period.
I'm a Partick Thistle fan though, which means every season the Jags take my life in their hands. It's come to the bit where I'm relieved and elated and want to go to the pub if we're only beaten 5-0.
One of the most shameful aspects of America's homeless population is that a good percentage is composed of veterans of foreign wars.
Oh, and the mentally ill.
m@
"veterans of foreign wars"
Oh, you got others too?
paddy if yer ever ready to jump and you need someone to call, well theres a reason you don't have my number.
sam problem child bride you have my sympathy.
Matt is it Nam vets? cos they are the most whiney vets you can get.
mago yer smoking hot lad you should have added a Ca-Chow!
Old Knudsen, the cameras and guard rails are because the buggers are too lazy to look for the bodies.
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