Does This Robot Arm Make Me Look Fat?

I've had this post knocking about my drafts for a while now, its an amazing story and while I'm on the subject of limbs I thought I would post it, my other post was full of naked weemen which I found just too tasteless to post, I mean who wants to see that? so heres this one instead.

I don't know if you have heard about this guy or not but not only is he amazing but the technology attached to him is too.
In 2001 Jesse Sullivan a former electrical company lineman from Dayton Tennessee took two massive jolts of electricity in an accident and since then has had the ability to read minds, no wait I'm confusing fantasy and reality again, damn those painkillers.
No, Mr Sullivan burned his arms so badly that they had to be amputated at the shoulders, the poor man can't remember the accident and only remembers the depression afterwards, thinking his life was done.
Seven weeks later a Dr Todd Kuiken from the rehabilitation institute of Chicago had him fitted with a thought controlled bionic left arm, they in a sense rewired the man, they grafted the pects in his chest to the nerves in his shoulders and his brain now thinks it has hands again and can move them.
I was watching this guy on some late night techie convention thing where they were up on stage explaining the whole thing to other doctors and the media, some soppy woman asked Mr Sullivan if his wife ever touched his chest so it would feel like they were holding hands, Mr Sullivan looked at her as if that had never occurred to him and replied, "no" I'm sure because he knows what his wife's hand now has to wipe lines of intimacy have been well crossed, no more cutesy stuff.
Dr Kuiken had a funny story at how Mr Sullivan broke several of the bolts on his new arm trying to start up a petrol powered lawn mower, well he wouldn't had thought it so funny if it was him paying for to have it fixed.
Mr Sullivan's right arm is a conventional prosthesis that can just open and close it's hand, his bionic left arm now has attachments for a leaf blower, angle grinder and a nose and ear hair trimmer, the research team are now working on a way to make the bionicman na na na na na na sound when he bends iron bars.

Thankgod he can still hold a pint there is a reason to go on.


At the age of 59 Mr Sullivan hopes to be an example to amputee soldiers returning from Iraq and Afghanistan to show them that there is a chance at a more normal life. The man is an example to us all, I doff my cap to you sir.

An inspirational story for my 300th post, if you're old, fat and ugly gurn up, at least you probably still have yer arms, if you don't well um sorry but on the off chance of you being an old ,fat ,ugly armless person you are one unlucky shite, hey it could be worse, if we were on a boat I'd throw you overboard for being a jinx.