Way too busy to be Blogging, leave it to the weemen.
Today is Australia day which means absolutely nothing to me. I love Australians as you know and have posted about them a few times before. Australian men are thick as pig shit but have that simple honesty about them, you will never see them on the Interweb as the way a fly cannot comprehend a pane of glass they cannot understand how to work a computer and continue to try to cook their pop tarts in the DVD opening. Too busy staring at tits drinking beer and calling each other Bruce.
Australian weemen are a bit brighter which is why you might meet them on-line, as I have mostly met Australian females I hold out hope for that strange race of people, fine ambassadors.
Those from New Zealand who get called Australian all the time are just a bunch of hobbit diddlers.
To demonstrate the stupidity and arrogance of people we turn our attention to those that wear slogans on their T-shirts. I read the T-shirts of others as isn't that the reason for them? to show everyone how wacky you are and show off yer opinion as if anyone cared, get a Blog then you'll see who doesn't care. My eye sight isn't that quick to focus anymore and people don't stand still for you so you may need several attempts for it. The amount of dirty looks I get from weemen that think I'm staring at their tits, ok they may be perky and yer T-shirt tight but don't flatter yerself I want to read something about you being yer own family or something or that you're a juicy princess. Then when they see you reading they get all self conscious about it and cover up.
Not the fool who was trying to catch a plane in Melbourne Australia to London (England for all you Yanks) he was turned away from the Qantas gate for refusing to change his T-shirt. Allen Jasson (mong) had a T-shirt with a picture of Bush on it saying "World's #1 terrorist", now maybe I'm missing the facts but Bush is the democratically elected President Of the U.S of A , if he was a terrorist the people would oust him, so this man is like Rain man or something, "uh oh Allen made a fart, Qantas the safest airline in the world", no offense to any mongs reading this ah who gives a fuck you happy moon faced bastards you aren't going to get this, away and dig in the garden.
Remember when everywhere had the right to refuse service signs up? well just because you can't see them doesn't mean they don't apply, and if you go on about free speech I will kick you in the balls for being stupid, its free as long as everyone likes what you are saying. I don't believe in free speech, I think you fuckers should pay me.
Qantas stated that Jasson had the potential to offend other customers and threaten the security of the aeroplane.
Next time wear yer Dead Kennedy's too drunk to fuck T-shirt moron.
Australian weemen are a bit brighter which is why you might meet them on-line, as I have mostly met Australian females I hold out hope for that strange race of people, fine ambassadors.
Those from New Zealand who get called Australian all the time are just a bunch of hobbit diddlers.
To demonstrate the stupidity and arrogance of people we turn our attention to those that wear slogans on their T-shirts. I read the T-shirts of others as isn't that the reason for them? to show everyone how wacky you are and show off yer opinion as if anyone cared, get a Blog then you'll see who doesn't care. My eye sight isn't that quick to focus anymore and people don't stand still for you so you may need several attempts for it. The amount of dirty looks I get from weemen that think I'm staring at their tits, ok they may be perky and yer T-shirt tight but don't flatter yerself I want to read something about you being yer own family or something or that you're a juicy princess. Then when they see you reading they get all self conscious about it and cover up.
Not the fool who was trying to catch a plane in Melbourne Australia to London (England for all you Yanks) he was turned away from the Qantas gate for refusing to change his T-shirt. Allen Jasson (mong) had a T-shirt with a picture of Bush on it saying "World's #1 terrorist", now maybe I'm missing the facts but Bush is the democratically elected President Of the U.S of A , if he was a terrorist the people would oust him, so this man is like Rain man or something, "uh oh Allen made a fart, Qantas the safest airline in the world", no offense to any mongs reading this ah who gives a fuck you happy moon faced bastards you aren't going to get this, away and dig in the garden.
Remember when everywhere had the right to refuse service signs up? well just because you can't see them doesn't mean they don't apply, and if you go on about free speech I will kick you in the balls for being stupid, its free as long as everyone likes what you are saying. I don't believe in free speech, I think you fuckers should pay me.
Qantas stated that Jasson had the potential to offend other customers and threaten the security of the aeroplane.
Next time wear yer Dead Kennedy's too drunk to fuck T-shirt moron.
22 comments:
Ooh dear, wait for Gaijin Girl to show up.
I confess, Old K, to having a few t shirts of the slogan variety. They are as follows (just so you don't have to stare; see how considerate i am) -
in tiny writing; 'If you can read this you are standing too close'
'Ok - so talk me through the Offside Rule'
'Fuck Fcuk'
'My other figure's a babe'
'No, clitoris is NOT a Greek Island'
Gaijin Gurl is Austrian, don't make me get a map out.
Those shirts are entrapment, if I get caught looking at tits I want it to be for the right reason. So what is a clitoris?
I don't know why, Knudsen, but I don't have any T-shirts that have writing on them. I don't feel comfortable wearing things like that. Maybe I figure if I wanted something on my shirt, I should write it there myself. Hey -- maybe I should do that. I wonder what I should write? I'll have to think about it. If I come up with something, I'll be sure to come over here and tell you about it.
You don't post about Pandas enough these days.
Remember that Footeater guy? I don't.
Australia Day …
Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
oh, I've wet 'em …
Ah, the other Lynn that would be, Old K and others... the first post is Lynn (me) from Cheltenham. The second claiming to have no t shirts, is not me. Confused? me too.
I'm too cold to think about Australia.
HAPPY FUCKIN 'STRA'IA DAY, OLD MAN!
Ahem. 1. 2. 3...
Once an old bitter man started up ten-thousand blogs,
Under the name of Old Knudsen,
And he sang as he watched and waited till his kettle boiled,
You'll come a blogging ya tossers with me.
Blogging ya tossers, blogging ya tossers,
You'll come a blogging ya tossers with me,
And he sang as he watched and waited till his kettle boiled
You'll come a blogging ya tossers with me.
--
Down flew Fat Sparrow to drink with Matilda
Up jumped Old Knudsen and grabbed her with glee,
And he sang as he put Fat Sparrow on his links list
You'll come a blogging ya tossers with me.
Blogging ya tossers, blogging ya tossers,
You'll come a blogging ya tossers with me,
And he sang as he put Fat Sparrow on his links list
You'll come a blogging ya tossers with me.
--
Up rode Kieran mounted on his panda bear
Along came the others, Kav and Eddie.
Who’s that in yer links list and can we be there too?
We’ll go a blogging ya tosser with you.
Blogging ya tosser, blogging ya tosser,
We’ll go a blogging ya tosser with you.
Who’s that in yer links list and can we be there too?
We’ll go a blogging ya tosser with you.
--
Up jumped Old Knudsen and sprang into cyberspace
You'll never catch me alive, said he,
And his ghost may be heard when you click on the 'next blog'
You'll come a blogging ya tossers with me.
Blogging ya tossers, blogging ya tossers,
You'll come a blogging ya tossers with me,
And his ghost may be heard when you click on the 'next blog'
You'll come a blogging ya tossers with me.
* GG staggers off, beer in hand… straight into wall. Decides that drunkenly singing songs from the motherland at karaoke at the top of her voice is a great idea *
Do you have a tip jar on this blog?
Gaijin Girl, the song is lovely. And Lynn, with your artistic talents, I think you need to start a line of T-Shirt with hidden messages imbedded in the paintings.
I don't like T-Shirts with our without words, but I understand why people would wear them and then cover them up because they're self-conscious. And I assume when someone wears a shirt that says Bush is a terrorist is hoping to be thrown off a plane. That's the point.
What if you wore a t-shirt saying "Bush is not a terrorist" on that plane. What would happen?
Good one gaijin girl. I knew it would be a good idea to keep checking Knudsen's blog.
My pal and I had our kids down at the swing-park the other week when a girl of certainly no more than 11 years walked by with "JUICY" written across her bum, twinkling prettily in the sunlight.
My pal, who is a bloke, said something like "See, I'm just confused. I assume her mother doesn't want 30-something men like me looking at her pubescent daughter's ass but I wouldn't even have noticed it had it not got JUICY written right across it."
We discussed it for a bit and concluded we were just happy it didn't have an exclamation mark too. Thinking on it now, I'm only glad there was not a question mark, or puntuation of any sort.
Juicy. I know it's a brand and that, but hell, Her Mammy, let the girl reach at least the age of majority before letting her have that slapped across her backside.
Gaijin Girl, that was a drunkenly musical triumph!
lynn US you should get a T-shirt that says "I know Old Knudsen", no you really should, I'm selling them.
kieran I believe Mr Eater to be a Panda and is in hibernation, what if the t-shirt had a pic of bush and said kick me hard?
sassy sundry next time someone complains about Global warming you can kick them in the balls.
gaijin gurl excellent song, you're my favourite again, Kieran didn't try hard enough and Footeater stopped sucking................up.
mj I did but surprise surprise someone stole it, thats what happens when yanks and Irish visit.
robyn her paintings would be full of subvertive comments and questions and not much painting, if you want a T-shirt stick with the classics"I'm with stupid".
Gaijin Gurl's song can be heard played on ice cream vans across the world, I always end up singing it.
dh very wise move, my picture of salma hayek is worth a visit alone.
sam problem-child-bride I have "may cause irritation " across my arse, I don't mind who looks, cos I know all the weemen look.
dive at our age the wetting is to be expected, don't worry the weemen love it.
Except when it leaks onto their side of the bed …
if a woman objects to sleeping on a wet patch then its time to find a new one, plenty about.
lol Old K you're incorrigible and Dive you're no better, encouraging him, dear me! Anyway it wouldn't leak onto our side because, by definition, the wet side is always yours.
heres the trick, assuming you have a double bed you always conclude yer sex on her side, its so simple yet no one thinks about it, weemen get caught up in the mood, we men are far more practical.
No i always noticed that tactic, Old K. Sussed and dealt with. As i said, it's not my side anymore. lol. Gosh it all gets decidedly intimate on here doesn't it. We know all your habits Old K.
Oh and clitoris? I know you want to see me stutter but..well. er it's um...well you see.. oh. is that the time?
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