Old Knudsen likes to examine subjects and topics that has nothing to do with him or his life,
mostly just to stir up shit, I'm like the Pope in that respect,
though I don't diddle young boys, and unlike the Pope I don't refuse to wear a condom or look upon my days in the Hitler Youth with shame, Hitler Youth, best days of your life.
Old Knudsen's mind is way too active, but not in a way that could benefit him.
I write 20 posts and put them into draft and when I look them over to see what I should put up I think, these are not funny or clever,you should be ashamed of yourself, so then I pass them on to Maroon or Eater.
Old Knudsen has mental bulimia.
I heard a R.E.M. song on the radio the other day, (boom box to you young uns) it was about a sidewinder missile that sleeps tonight, I couldn't make out half the words, its said that Scottish pop singers all sound American (Proclaimers don't count) but I can understand them so try sounding Scottish, American singers, anyway I could picture the Michael Strapon guy flailing his arms about in his tard having a fit way and I thought of the movie, 'The life of David Gale' and then it all connected, the world for one brief second made sense but then I had another thought and forgot the last one, REM and Kevin Spacey have the same vibe about them, not great looking but very talented and interesting to watch and can turn dangerous and serious in a heartbeat, oh and totally stuck in the closet.
Why do all Stephen King books start really slowly and are unnecessarily descriptive , then have a bit of action in the middle and a fast unsatisfying ending? he seems preoccupied with people that turn out not to be as they seem and are pure evil, perhaps he spends too much time on the Interweb.
Then again if you want unnecessary descriptiveness just read Dickens, I'm a crap writer but I can describe everything if I wanted to, maybe when I get a name for myself as a famous writer and run out of ideas I'll start with the filler writing .
Brad Pitt is very pretty, hes also a good actor which is besides the point, I take a kind of jealous pleasure in knowing that his name is synonymous with taking a shit, its rhyming slang, I'm going for a Brad Pitt , Shit .
I was talking to Billy one ear the other day, I said "Billy I've had enough, I want to finally come out of the closet", Billy was a bit drunk and this seemed to make him angry, "no ya silly wee fucker , its for your own good if you don't", I felt trapped and alone, but I knew Billy was right, so I sat in the closet for another 3 hours while Billy drank and played Russian Roulette, 'must be a Thursday' I thought, why he likes to lock old men into closets when hes had a few drinks is a mystery.
89% of Blogs that contain the word 'Ramblings' in the title don't actually ramble.
75% of massages lead to sex
92% of Straight men have masturbated to gay porn.
93% of Americans claim Irish descent of some kind, and think its cool.
49% of Irish think Americans claiming Irish descent are funny as fuck but want their money.
51% of Irish are too drunk to think.
74% of the readers of this Blog want to shag Old Knudsen.
95% of statisics are made up by bored arseholes.
Saturday, 7 October 2006
Weekend Musings.
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12 comments:
"Why do all Stephen King books start really slowly and are unnecessarily descriptive , then have a bit of action in the middle and a fast unsatisfying ending?"
Sounds like bad sex.
"92% of Straight men have masturbated to gay porn."
And probably linoleum, and frozen turkeys, and power tool catalogs, and....
Bad sex, linoleum, frozen turkeys and power tool catalogs, sounds like my third marriage.
I am actually of Irish decent, or it is Scottish. Probably both since I'm from Alabama stock.
So...when do you start with the filler writing?
You're either saying that I'm famous or out of ideas, I suspect the later, thats your Irish blood talkin, its probably telling you to drink more and wash with muck.I reached down for my mouse, it was the size of a child's hand except it was rounded and silver with HP on the top, the wheel was clogged with lint causing the cursor guiding to be problematic at best, I moved to the long blue Login and publish button, my mind drifted to the dump I had just taken, it was a little like my fourth marriage but not so long and painful, and less blood, the toilet paper I used was white,soft and now full of shite just like the popular boy band West life.
Well done Mr Knudsen, being of Irish descent I want you to know how exact you are in how you've summed up my people, keep up the god work.
Its the only thing I agree with the English on, its good to see a mucksavage not in denial or too drunk to type, as for your slip with 'god work' it probably is.
I'll see to it that you get a knighthood for this, or at least some Balmoral whisky.
Can you explain to me what Kevin Spacey's game is with all this West End malarky? Is he trying to prove a point, is he Irish?
I'm part Welsh, and we are the true Celts, so the hell with you Scotch and Eirse pretenders. We have given the world yodelling and man-sheep love and Dylan Thomas, plus that Charlotte Church who's a bit of class.
KieranAmerica being a young nation has a lot to prove to their european parents, and while they get on all arrogant as if they don't care its just a cry for help and approval, actors know that true Thespians are only decended from Shakespeare so they come to his land diddle young boys and talk all posh like, hoping the RSC will notice so American actors being lightweights hope that Sir Ian McKellan or someone like that will rub off on them, as for being Irish, isn't most Americans? at the moment he is commited to his long term partner 'old vic' and plans to get dual british citizenship and a phoney british accent.
Mr EaterWho the hell are the Welsh? is that those gits with the pasties? funny you never mentioned the Shame of Wales, Aled Jones.
As I sat here wondering which ones were true, I found myself ready to defend my Irish honor. I'm more Irish than most and feel it in my bones and not just on Saint Paddy's Day. I feel it enough that the very last words uttered to,
Mr.Micky O'Dwyer, my Father, were, "Dad, we're Fighting Irish,you remember that and I'll always know it." He died two days later, while I was away on a business trip. I'm content with what I said.
You thought some of them might be true? damn I am good, all those arseholes on St Paddy's day, if they were really Irish they wouldn't need an excuse to drink, its getting bigger in Ireland now but in my world you don't even notice it, I went into a bar and was asked if I wanted a green pint, everyone stopped and looked at me to see my answer, I said "why would I want a green pint?" the barman then told me it was St Paddy's day, I said "fuck off and just get me a pint" which in that pub (protestant) was the right answer.
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