Can a woman not piss out of her bikini without the press wanting a picture?
Its been a busy weekend but I really can't be arsed talking about it, they brought back hanging just for Paris Hilton, Jimmy Carter had a stroke and is now a vegetable but who cares? Margaret Thatcher (the iron maiden) died but the thing that gets on Old Knudsen's goat is the paparazzo, those fucking wankers that hang about outside my hoose to get a picture of me without my makeup on, not that I wear makeup. I'm no fudge packer no matter what others claim.
After my last post I was pleasantly surprised to find that Jessica Alba is one of my lurkers, she e-mailed me with several kind words and a promise of a date when her next film wraps up, I said I'd think about it, yep I'm so fucking cool.
Jessica is also plagued by the paparazzo and wonders why they don't get real jobs and if they even pay taxes.
Enough you paparazzo scum, so what if she wants to piss from out of her swimming costume? leave her alone, she doesn't want public attention she just wants to be left alone, well after Sin City and Into The Blue maybe she wants a little public attention.
Fuck I hate the Paparazzo and their telescopic lens, how the hell is this picture flattering? I would in no way buy a magazine with this pic on the cover, it disgusts me, who wants to see Jessica Alba on all fours in a bikini? I know I don't want to see it, give her a feed of chips and then she can do it, this week I will be focusing on how men and weemen are portrayed in the media, you may think this is a clever ploy to post porn but really there will be a message behind it, well ok if I can think of something better like the Thatcher funeral maybe I'll post about it.
12 comments:
yes yes yes.
You must be a yes man.
I did a google search for Thatcher! Grrrrrrrrr. I'm so feckin gullable at times!!!!
Don't feel bad Ellie; I sat here thinking "Carter had a STROKE in the night?!?!" before I went googling and felt foolish.
Good one Old K.
I am claiming temporary insanity caused by not being quite awake and suffering from the effects of too much alcohol last night.
I'm more curious about why she's giving herself a wedgie.
I believe it produces greater pressure, producing a more impressive piss stream.
Seriously I'm gonna come round and bate you if you dont knock it off with the Alba. What you dont see in that picture is me in my speedos on a lounger beckoning her towards me and my cornetto
ellie she wasn't very lively last night.
samd he did have a stroke of his peanut.
MJ maybe Manuel is up her hole.
yer lordship she could bottle her piss and sell it, I bet theres a market.
manuel yer cornetto isn't very big maybe she didn't notice it.
She did the job but the recession sucked.
I huv just downloaded yer picture of Jessica Alba pissing and shall be wanking off to it in the early hoors of the mornin.
If you cud post a piccy of Margaret Thatch pissin' I whud be eternaly grateful. Also it whud serve to get the horny electorate to vote for the cunt.
PS isn't she the same bird whot does awl those hifi systems annat? Alba record players, ye knaw. (fock me, i'm showin me age)
I'll see what I can do with thatcher, I had an Alba boom box, thats the only Alba I'll have.
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