Everbody Spies

Old Knudsen cannae tell you about everything hes done in his past, the only person hes ever told EVERYTHING to was a young psychiatrist who ended up going insane and to this day remains a slobbering wretch of a man .... it didn't affect his career any and I hear he practices medicine in London.

Keep practicing lad, someday you'll get it right.

Old Knudsen AKA The Storm Bringer AKA The Grim Raper AKA Death From Kilamory serial number 57- 84C security rating at time of retirement TGA - 17 with a level 4 rating in Extra Terrestrial negotiation and human enslavement processor grade 3 used to be a super secret spy working for the good guys, MI5, MI6, MFI, ASIS, R&AW, MOSSAD, KFC, CSIS, NSA, CIA to name but a few and loads of private contract work, gotta pay me rent, and me dealer etc. 

If I told anybody that, their lives would be over. Just a matter of when and how violent. I let it slip in a conversation with a prostitution I was trying to hire for a job but was short on the amount of funds she requested which I thought at the time to be quite high and I know about being high.  She was found a week later chopped up in a suitcase .... strange huh, but because of my past I can't go to police stations and tell them this, besides I was having some serious varnish related blackouts around that time I wasn't in a good place in me life and peelers are idiots, they would probably blame Old Knudsen or something just as dumb.
The reason why I was in such a bad way was because my wife left me for another man .... and took the dog, fuck I loved that doggie not just as a pet but in ways mere mortals cannae comprehend.

So here I am blabbering on and

You only read my blog for the chance of seeing naked weemen online cos yer too lazy to go searching for porn and yer wife checks yer Interweb history .... domestic spying.

The whole spying thing going on at the moment with Eddy Snowden is giving Old Knudsen flashbacks to the cold war .... fuck it was cold.

 

Nipples popping up like corks. 

The US spying on it's allies ..... terrible so it is.

Even Brazil came out and harshly condemned the US for spying ..... then it turned out that they themselves had been spying on those same allies.

    Carlos from Rio wants to know what you are wearing.

So Brazil came out with a very good reason as why it would be spying on the likes of Germany. 'To see if they were spying on Brazil'  as Dr House says, "Everbody spies" well he might have said it, I stopped watching him after a while, like Monk like Desperate hoosewives like psyched like Dexter ..... they start getting old after the joke/novelty has been played out.  America has so many TV shows they throw out without a clue on how to get to season 2 and so get cancelled, some shows like Lost get lucky and stick it out till the end.

Ryan Fogle of the US embassy in Russia with his Shaggy wig after the FSB somehow figured out he was a spy. Could it have been the shaggy wig?

Anyway everybody spies and anything goes that you can get away with, you do know that Germany is no doubt spying on everyone too right? if you don't believe that then you live in a cushy middle class sheltered life bubble of inexperience and denial, and you know it otherwise why do you get so worked up when someone accuses you of being middle class? 

Oh but Germany is the victim ..... Germany was asking for it, the way it dresses .  

Old Knudsen has long since retired, the game has gotten way too high tech for him, now they have robots following and assassinating robots, no one needs disinformation jockeys anymore, but what if we do spy-ception a lie built on a lie but based on the truth that actually didn't happen the way people think it did, and then just deny everything? 
You can fool some of the people some of the time but you can't fool all of the people all of the time but those who aren't fooled can have their credibility destroyed and maybe have a nasty accident or happen to be in the same place that some teen goes nuts with his assault rifle.

No one asks the right questions anymore but when they do stumble upon the right question to ask the Interweb is waiting to give them the "proper" answer.

The sky is more grey than blue these days, too many cloud-based applications no doubt.
 
    

This blog is open to invited readers only

This blog is open to invited readers only


So did you all get the invites? It made you feel special right? Did I miss anyone out and if so were yer feeling hurt or did you say, "well at least I don't have to read that crap anymore?"

I only went personal because I like drama and want it all to be about me, this will teach you bitches for not reading me more, ha! feel the burn of my sword of gonorrhea. I bet you all sat there and cried a river and thought about ending it all.

No I went personal because one of my family found my blog and saw the smut I post. I was sore ashamed. Nah not really if me Ma can't take a joke then fuck the bitch what has she ever done for me? Well there was that time she turned me over to the Saxons and at the time I thought it was betrayal as I was tortured for 18 hours but she was right it was for my own good, I can see that now. Ah the perspective of old age.

No I went personal because a co-worker didn't like the way I called them a fat lazy fucker who scratches their hole and then sniffs their finger as they serve you in the canteen. I'm the one who changes and puts out the saw dust on the floor, office workers can sure be bitchy sometimes.

No I went personal because of nasty spammers, what have ya got something better to do? I haven't been spammed in ages, lazy crazy immature cunts. I'm sure attacking Savannah was very satisfying. I should do a list of bloggers who are nut jobs and not to be trusted. I mean besides the ones in my links.
Rule of thumb: If someone has deleted, removed and completely changed their blog on numerous occasions citing that someone is after them there is a 96% chance that they are fucking nut jobs.
Hey what do I know? yer such a good judge of character.

No I went personal because the doctor changed my meds and I saw the futility of blogging for free and am writing a book ............. yes a book, on paper ................... yes people still buy those things, like newspapers they will always be around. Did you get that I was being sarcastic there?

I'm off to buy a HD-DVD player because Blue-ray is a flash in the pan, ok I may have been wrong about 8 tracks and Beta VCR's but this time I'm certain.

DVD's and CD's are quickly becoming obselete only older people buy books now and we are quickly dying out. Unless its penis books and then MJ will keep them in business.


No I went personal to appear more popular than I actually am. I want all you cunts to imagine me having a secret Skull and Bones club going on with really funny blog posts and only the chosen few can join in. Yes its like school all over again.



Ok the real reason, Old Knudsen is not a blogger he is a force of nature. If you look deep into his eyes and past his cataracts you will see his inner god. We are all dieties some are the god of cum stains while others like Old Knudsen are the gods of hidden knowledge and occult learnings. Old Knudsen has forgotten more than .................... who are you people and what are you doing in my living room?

Old Knudsen is as changable and unpredictable as the sea, he is also cold and wet. Does the sea ever explain herself? take my salty spray all over yer face and ponder what it is all about.

If you didn't notice any change and just clicked on me for the first time this week then you missed all the fun and I deleted it as it was too racy and could have brought doon nations..... yer loss.


I have one question for you all: Is it safe?

The above film *The Snickers man* scared generations of Brits and thus contributed to the poor dental hygiene in the UK. What has this got to do with anything? Well World War one and the sequel which was better than the first 'World War II this time its personal' and the film is about Nazis and when you think about Nazis you think of Argentina and then Germany right?

You see this stream of consciousness is the reason that I stand outside of society looking in as I live in that gray area between madness and genius known as my hoose, the local police have asked me to take the tin foil off me roof as it distracts their ghetto birds when the sun shines onto it.
Yeah right I studied under Nikola Tesla and later under Sir Robert Watson-Watt I know what mind control/brain fryers they have.

So anyway the G-20 are performing in London at the mo, 50 cent and Method man are there with the Obamas who not only hugged the Queen but gave her an i-Pod. Prince Philip extended his hand to shake Obama's hand and Obama instead of a hand shake he gave him some of that negro dap.

Gordon brown is being treated a bit better by the president and no wonder, France and Germany are siding up together, bring on 'World War III the end of times'.

Since Mago lives in the magic land of Franconia where the unicorns run free he should be safe . I think we should nuke the fuck out of Germany before they build up their forces again.

Be a bit more grateful to the great Satan ya Nazi cunts you wouldn't have an economy if it wasn't for America and Britain re-building yer cuntry after they bombed it, and it was yer fault .............. twice!

France? who gives a shit what they think?

What about those riots in London then? fucking mad it was. I would have loved to fire a few rounds of rubber or plastic bullets into those hippy student cunts but all the English police had was their batons and a stern tone of voice. I think the crowd needs a few stockbrokers beheaded to appease them.

My restraining orders have not been added as there are well over 350 of them but all my awards from you brown nosing cunts have been added to a different blog the link you'll find on me side board there.

I must say the award giving to me has slowed doon rightly, what the fuk? has the quality of my blog got so bad? How can you get any worse ya dopey shites? .................. Thinks about The Troll Report blog.

I myself have only given out one award this year as I can not afford the $5000 that goes along with it too often so get working on getting my attention, witty blog posts and naked pictures are a good start.



*Marathon being the old name for the Snicker bars in the UK*

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Islamic Idol, "Am a maze i ing he ing ger ace a ace how ow ow say weet we et the hu huh huh say ound e ound" I swear Amazing Grace didn't have so many syllables, and you call that singing, that's pathetic.

Wha wha wha! where is Old Knudsen with my daily dose of clap and humour? well according to my shite meter no one cares anyway must be coming into summer.

C'mon people when the greatest blogger in the world gets less than a hundred hits that means either hes lost his edge or his readers got lives. I'm more inclined to think I've lost my edge as my readers are such sad pathetic cunts............. no offense.

Little did I know that moving to the land of the fat and the home of the poorly educated would employment opportunities open up so readily.

I can't say much about my work as its highly classified, all I can say is that the president himself Dick Cheny sent me to Guantánamo Bay to torture er I mean question the prisoners, I left on a secret flight by black helicopter to a special ops airport in San Diego under the command of Colonel Josh Williams to fly by red and white aeroplane to Cuba.

Sorry I can't give you details about my work but it would be way too dangerous for you.

Silly cunts they pray to Mecca 5 times a day and still don't know where it is.

Guantánamo Bay is a lovely place by the sea. I think people only want to close it out of jealousy because they can't live in a tropical paradise so why should the ragheads?

Lets use the human rights argument, yeah yeah and pedos have human rights too 'BOOM' yer argument has just shown you up as a pedo terrorist lover and no friend of mine.

Support the troops, give a yank a yank.

I heard all the same silly things during the Boer war when the British set up concentration camps for the families of the Boers who didn't like British rule in order to force them to surrender yawn yawn yawn, just look at South Africa now full of blacks hacking each other to death with machetes and burning each other to death with tires.

I want to know one thing, in South Africa there is violence against immigrants from countries like Zimbabwe and the Congo, they are killing them there, what I want to know is how can they tell the foreigners apart? they all look the same.

Africa, America, Northern Ireland see what happens when you kick the British troops out? crime goes up and education goes doon.

On the whole people still like the British mostly because we brought civilisation to a quarter of the world who didn't appreciate it but also because people think the Brits are quirky people who drink tea and wear funny hats, hey fuck face don't sit there looking at my avatar go put the fucking kettle on and I'm Ulster/Scots, I'm only British to you cunts that don't know a thing about my culture and I'm tired of explaining it, go read a book or something .

Why honour the human rights of the Sand savages at Guantánamo Bay ? are they actually human? look what happened when the blacks had their human rights recognised, they blame whitey and eat BBQ chicken and cause crime, at least before they had work and we had cheap cotton and servants.

Remember the blacks never believed or cared much for weemen's rights and going by the way they treat their bitches and hos now they still don't.

You have the right to remain hot! I love weemen, have I mentioned that before? oh fer yer minds and intellect.

So the blacks were allowed to vote and then white weemen are allowed such rights too, look how the gurls re-pay us, they stop faking orgasms and just tell us er you that yer crap and won't suck yer willy anymore because they got what they wanted.

I don't mind paying for whatever but I just miss the old days .

Don't get me wrong I'm not racist or sexist I just want my willy treated like an ice cream cone before it melts and for black people to pull up their trousers and stop being so loud and fucking vulgar. Not much to ask for now is it?

So anyway getting back to my job that I can't talk about those sand niggers at Guantánamo Bay all say they are innocent but give them a sword and an infidel and they will convert you to Islam.

After I'm finished with them they are lucky if they can hold swords, the first rule of torture.......you don't talk about it , the second rule of torture.......... you call it interrogation, the third rule of torture......... earn yer pay and be professional, theres nothing as bad as someone doing their job half arsed.

Fair weather friends, otherwise known as politicians. Oh I'll talk to Iran ok, I'll tell them to fuck off!

I say keep Guantánamo Bay open and in 100 years or so let some ragheads open up casinos to keep them happy.
If you close Guantánamo Bay you let the terrorists win and why appease them when you should be nuking them? unless you like terrorists that is and are therefore unpatriotic, you cunts! go vote for Obama why don't you for yer hope, change and other vague things, at least with McCain you know what yer getting.

As a white Christian male with at least 4 years of schooling under his belt I see nothing wrong at Guantánamo Bay and at $12 an hour I'll question yer ma with electric nipple clamps (I'd do that for free, yer ma is hot) so don't go judging and handing out human rights, next you'll want Osama to get a fair trial and what happens when he hires expensive lawyers and gets off with it?

If you believe in fairies, the loch Ness monster and that yer vote matters then yer a mong, go read 'The Secret' and buy Al Gore's film.

Just stand back and let us do our jobs, go sort out Global warming or something. I looked up Global warming on Snopes.com and guess what? its a load of old bollocks, slap yerself you idiot hippy types.

If you cum here looking for new funny posts every day well you pay me for fuck all so go read the old posts you didn't bother to read before theres well over 2000 so get busy, I ain't yer monkey boy.

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