Gerry Kelly Is Not Superman

During a parade in North Belfast, a 16 year-old male was arrested by the police for being a dickhead. While driving off Gerry Kelly a former IRA terrorist and now prominent politician stood in the way of the police landrover blocking it's way. Mr Kelly was soon taken by surprise when it kept going.

From Kelly's and Sinn Fein's point of view he was hit by a moving vehicle and dragged for 50 yards. In reality he grabbed hold of the front grill and got a slow lift for 20 feet.

Carál Ní Chuilín .... real name Carol Cullen but she wanted to Irish herself up. The Sinn Fein Culture Minister claims she had torn ligaments in her shoulder when she too tried to use her imagined super strength to stop a moving vehicle.

The mob that smashed their fists against the police landrover all claim to have athletes foot and whiplash from the incident.   

C'mon dude, if you wanted to talk to the police who arrested the youth then go to the station, don't stand in front of a moving vehicle screaming and gesturing in an angry manner. Who the fuck elected this clown?