The Illuminati Want You

You know that times are tough all round whenever a secret society sends you an invite e-mail. This is from a real e-mail cos you can't make this shit up.

Are you a business man? Business woman ? Artist? Politicians? Student? ..... well sort of a piss artist that is in the business of studying politics and I'm half man and half woman on my mother's side, how do they know so much about me? 

And you want to become Big and Rich, Protections and Powerful, famous, Promoting your Job office position and make your company product the most popular and best seller in the world, join us to become one of our official Illuminati brotherhood member today and you shall be given a chance to visit the Illuminati initiation center and his representative after registrations are completed by you,

I do want to be big, more in length than girth though and yes being rich with protections would be great. They have an initiation center ? 

 Join us.

Illuminati brotherhood brings along wealth and famous in life, you have a full access to eradicate poverty away from your life now.

 

It is only a member who has been initiated into the church of Illuminati that have the authority to bring any member to the church, so the Illu minati initiation for this year new members is available now Join us today and realize your dreams.

Will they make my life great again? I feel that I've got the grammar skillz for the Illuminati. If eradicate poverty from my life means killing the annoying homeless people asking for change then I'm in ... of course I wouldn't kill any homeless vets as that would be wrong. If I join then I could bring all my friends into the church too. 

If only I had friends. 

 No bimbos were hurt during the making of this blog post.

Once you become a member you will be Rich true whatever you are doing on this planet as your occupation more ideals will be giving to you and protected and as an actor or actress Politicians you will be famous and powerful for the rest of your life, the Illuminati makes they members happy so Join and be one of the successful Person on earth if you are interested fill the form below to the below email address to enable the Illuminati registration department process your membership and an invitation for the initiation will be send to you wherever you are in any part of the World.   

I so want to be Rich true and happy, sign me the fuck up. I'll be the the most famous and powerful blogger in the werld. Fox News would have me on as an "expert" and that 3am call to the president would go to me first.
Knowing my luck it'll be only for the mainland and they don't accept members from Northern Ireland, we get that a lot living in butt fuck Norn Iron.    

Email Address:(  registared.center@yandex.com

 

Full Name:…..

Nationality:…..

Current Full Address:…. 

Country:…….

Occupation:......

Date of Birth:……..

Gender:……….

Phone No:…….

Email Address:….

Tell us a little about yourself…

Of course I can't give full details as I have trust issues. I don't want the crazies from the I.T. departments to start spamming me again.

I'll tell you a little about myself. I'm a Scottish Viking from Northern Ireland who is immortal. I know this as I've survived the Man-flu. I'm a time traveler and take a lot of drugs, mostly prescription these days cos I'm old. I like boobs and big arses and have often never gotten hard watching ghey porn. I'm all man with a little piss stained animal thrown in.
I respect broads, coloureds, gooks, wogs and queers but the Dutch need to be destroyed. I'm a very compassionate and sensitive person unless it's the morning as then I'll rip you apart if you get in my way.

I don't really like to talk about myself unless it's with hookers cos then I kill them afterwards and dump them out at sea chopped into pieces. Yes I have intimacy issues too though any port in a storm is a way of life.

I can't wait to join the Illuminati so then I can shape the werld and get away with so much more. Restraining orders are for the weak, I'm in the Illuminati! ... look at my membership card.

 

WARNING:  If you are not interested or Below 18 Years old Do not reply.

 

This Message Is From The Illuminati Worldwide Occult Government Center. 

I have to send them some questions first about robes and sacrifices etc. They do know that occult means hidden or secret right?    

 

Never Mind Harry Potter Will This Post Ever End?

Meet Dr Congo the man responsible for all the recent spammings. Observe his stiffy as he writes this:

"I am clever knudsen you are a fucking idiot.soon you be gone and me be happy.you may have bested me when when dueled at Niagara falls but now I win with my spam of doom. I hurt your feelings like a puppy in a trash compactor."

It goes on for a bit and I vaguely remember him from Niagara, I thought he was dead. I was lazy and stingy and didn't double tap him, hey bullets are expensive. I was able to get this picture from my contacts in the CIA and Torchwood, just moments later he was called doonstairs by his mother for his dinner, sources report he still didn't put any clothes on, oh and for the record Old Knudsen is bigger doonstairs if you know what I mean and I don't mean my dinner.

A reminder.

I do Satire not Satyr . Horned deities of the wild who followed the gods Pan, Dionysus , Bacchus and Iggy Pop. they loved music, drink and human weemen, hey who doesn't ? St. Jerome wrote of a Satyr that was captured alive in the reign of Emperor Constantine, it lived in Greece until it died. Aldrovandus a medieval writer said there were many still living in Ireland which goes a long way to explain Niolk ........BAM!
A Satyr can also instill fear and terror into the unsuspecting traveler and the name Pan goes towards making the modern word panties for which we give him thanks especially white cotton panties stretched to capacity across a woman's ample behind, um what was I saying? oh yeah the Greeks and the Irish must of fucked goats, *hey have you seen their weemen?*

"What do ya reckon Jim?" "Um Ted I think its dead."

Scientists found a 40,000 year old fully intact baby mammoth. Firstly I don't believe in science and secondly anything over 5000 years old was planted by Satan, do I look like I came doon in the last shower?

Where is this post going?

No where fast I believe. Its July 21st which is national end a post with some old guy spanking a hottie day, c'mon get with the spirit.

Scott Caan, one of the few Scotts that doesn't wear a kilt, but fuck doesn't he look and act like his Da James?

*I will burn for this remark but its all just a bit of craic I love the Celtic woman.*

If You Were Spammed.

Some of you may have by now been spammed by some individuals using my avatar. I have been under attack with these childish twats for the last week and as they are not getting anywhere with me and I haven't broken doon and cried they are following the path I thought they would and commenting/spamming as me to discredit me.

They are doing this out of jealousy and small mindedness. I can't help it if I became popular or if I'm more funny than them. Of course I'll never give in and take my blog doon. I will not let the terrorists win.

I have followed them on my 3 site meters and various comments etc and know who it is and know who is somehow connected with them in this.
I am not interested in hearing the denials from the numerous fake personas they have created or how I am paranoid as I heard all that same sort of crap in the OJ trial.
Sure I look a bit like the guy from the film "The body snatchers" going around telling everyone who the aliens are but just remember how that worked out.

They spam themselves and argue with themselves in their comments to look good but myself and Fat Sparrow know their lies.

They won't stop and don't care about you, they are stupid people who can't take being bested so resort to childish pranks to make them think they are powerful and are in control in their lives. Fuck the penis issues and lack of hugs in their lives are so abundantly clear.

Here are those responsible, if you have them on yer links feel free to remove them. Yes its a he said/ she said thing and I can only give you my word that what I say is true.
Why would I do this after 10 months? please e-mail me if you have any doubts, I am a real person just trying to have fun with a blog until these morons decided to try and stop me.
I don't care how many years they have been blogging for or their denials for 10 months I never got any hate mail until after this lot contacted me about a writing gig that was just a set up.

The Curmudgeon -- Philip Challinor Head wanker boring as fuck and arrogant feeling smug due to being over educated .

The Japing Ape -- Gorilla Bananas A Challinor persona likes to play a nice guy. Attacks in subtle ways like in posts and passing it off as humour, classic abuse.

The Jungle-- Jungle Jane Challinor's attack hag Stupid all day unfunny all night responsible for most of the spamming really really not too bright.

AAA Hussey Written by Challinor and used by others to comment and attack from, just a front.

Blog this -- Jenny Friend or Persona of Jane who cares?

Other personas used for spamming myself and others --- my own of course, Hector Munroe, Sister Bridget, The Monday club and now Mamout.


They made me post this, they wouldn't stop, go talk to them I've had it with the slimy cunts, of course they'll tell you I'm mad and will be very indignant about it . I am being spammed as I write this, I knew I shouldn't have clicked on to GB's blog in the middle, those fucking I.T. twats, whatever.

Here is the usual spammer ISP .As you all know I'm on AOL and definitely no where near the UK , (except in my head)

Domain Name

(Unknown)
IP Address

86.140.240.# (British Telecommunications)
ISP

British Telecommunications
Location

Continent
:
Europe
Country
:
United Kingdom (Facts)
State/Region
:
Solihull
City
:
Redditch
Lat/Long
:
52.3, -1.9333 (Map)
Language

English (U.S.)en-us
Operating System

Macintosh MacOSX
Browser

Firefox 2.0Mozilla/5.0 (Macintosh; U; PPC Mac OS X Mach-O; en-US; rv:1.8.1.1) Gecko/20061204 Firefox/2.0.0.1
Javascript

version 1.5
Monitor

Resolution
:
1440 x 900
Color Depth
:
32 bits
Time of Visit

Jul 10 2007 10:35:33 pm
Last Page View

Jul 10 2007 10:35:33 pm
Visit Length

0 seconds
Page Views

1
Referring URL
http://ayscoughe-hussey.blogspot.com/
Visit Entry Page

http://oldbitterballs.blogspot.com/index.html
Visit Exit Page

http://oldbitterballs.blogspot.com/index.html
Out Click


Time Zone

UTC-1:00
Visitor's Time

Jul 10 2007 9:35:33 pm
Visit Number

33,546

In light of new information Lord Milky has been relegated to spammer pawn and his only guilt is by association with said spammers.

Fucking Venting .

There is a town in Austria called Fucking and they get really fucked off sometimes because people keep stealing the signs, sure it may seem like a lark at the time until you wake up the next day with a massive hangover a Fucking sign sticking out of yer 50 inch TV and covered in the blood of the hooker that's in various states of dismemberment around yer hoose, c'mon you've been there, not really a story to tell friends when they ask why can't they watch the match on yer TV. Never mind the Football (soccer if your'e a cunt) I have a sign with a rude word on it ::::giggle giggle::::

I write this post fucking raging (angry to you non English speaking tossers) I've already posted below today , a nice big post with thought put into it, go fucking appreciate it now but then I got angry and you wouldn't like me when I'm angry yes I know you don't like me anyway, its a Blog not a popularity contest. "Why are you mad Old Knudsen?" oh finally someone that gives a fuck, I'll tell ya why, something called a spam challenge, nothing to do with the processed meat taken from the arse of pigs its one of them security codes whenever you make a comment so the the spam bots don't get past. Do I look like a spam bot? what fucking spam bot would be making a comment about licking strawberry jam off some woman's nipples and offering to shave her back?

My eye sight isn't the best at times and me glasses have been stolen by Slavs (probably, no proof as of yet) so I sit an inch away from the screen and type what I think it shows, I'm pretty sure I get it but no, sometimes Blogger feels sorry for me and after a tough one I get an idiots one, this grey speckled one here was a real cunt. I believe they sometimes make up letters by sticking two letters together.