World Profile #2: The French

France is a beautiful cuntry with green rolling fields, meandering wide rivers and a large open sky full of diamond like sparkling stars .... totally wasted on the French people.

Socrates said that the French made love with their tongue and fought with their feet but he had issues, he was bitten by a Frenchie as a child. It's not known what the French think about Socrates as they don't speak English. Well actually English is taught in schools and is their second language but the French just refuse to speak  it as they enjoy how ghey British people sound as they try to pronounce French werds. They all know how to speak English fluently.

Stubbornness is just one of many charming traits the French have, apathy is a national past time as are sudden outbursts of impotent rage. When Hitler invaded France during WWII the French shrugged and said, "let him have it," they only formed a resistance to the Nazis when curfews interrupted their cheese and wine nights.      

French weemen are famous for their great beauty and style. Their standard of hygiene is different than other nations as they find cigarette, alcohol and garlic breath arousing and often go months without bathing, using perfume to mask the smells.
French children start smoking and drinking aged 6 - 7 and there are no virgins in France over the age of 9. Getting gonorrhea is a rite of passage moment and there are drive-thru abortion clinics. 

Famous for their dry bleh pastries that don't taste like anything they are also known for their cheese and their love of eating garden pests and small amphibians probably covered in cigarette ash, garlic and dipped in wine.
The French have a strange way of looking at food, the French werd for apple is pomme, which is ok but then they call potatoes the apple of the ground, (pomme de terre) that's as bad as the Mexicans calling Iguana's the chicken of the tree.   

The French are famous for loving life, just not British lives, British lives don't matter. France can be compared to an ungrateful teenager whose life you've saved twice but they are deeply resentful about it. A hard working people the French work a 3 hour week but those 3 hours are very hectic with only an hour for lunch. The average French person retires aged 50 and if they don't they go on strike and burn things.

 Asterix the Gaul, one of France's greatest heroes. 

Famous for being great warriors their hey day was when they nearly won something under Napoleon. A famous tactic the French use is luring the enemy in and making them think they have successfully invaded but in reality the French are silently mocking them, this tactic was first used against the Romans who didn't have a clue as to what didn't hit them.

Another French hero was a young peasant gurl who heard voices in her head. Only the French would not give a fuck so much as to follow a young crazy chick, even they got sick of her cray cray and gave her to the English to burn. Some nations give you medals .... ah, the French. 

 

As well as being resentful towards British people the French also hate Americans and non-French speaking Canadians, their refusal to bomb the fuck out of brown Middle Eastern people is very telling, they will however expect to get rescued should the shit hit the fan. France is like that friend who gets you into fights with his big mouth ....  yeah you walking you chicken shit.

The French believe themselves to have a continental style that others lack just because they call their pubs "cafe," if you go to a cafe in the cuntry you may be expected to take a stylist dump into a hole in the ground. Much in the way some weemen hover over the toilet seat as someone with a hidden camera once told me.

If garish and tacky are stylish then the French are indeed very stylish. If you enjoy being looked down upon, finding armpit hairs in yer sandwich and seeing children with more game than what you have then France is the place for you.      



 

Hairy Vadge Or Not A Hairy Vadge? That Is The Question

Americans are a wonderful people, they like to put it out there while we British shake our heads and tut. Repression is the norm for us, Gog bless you Queen Victoria .... even though she was a total freak in the sack.
American Apparel put bush on their shop window dollies, maybe hairy nosed guy mannequins are next. Will Barbie stop hacking off her thatch? 

Is the bush back? Is the Sasquatch look sexy? do we even know what sexy is anymore or are others just going to call you a pervert because that is how we've been trained to think?  If Old Knudsen had a dollar for every time he was called a pervert he'd be rich, even with the crappy dollar to pound exchange rate.
A pervert is someone who will do what you won't.  

A pretty lass with nicely plucked eyebrows with some brown, blonde barbie doll wanna be.

Research student Emer O’Toole went hairy for a year to battle those artificial gender norms, I loved her 'get yer pits out for the lads' comment though the presenter 'Eamon Holmes the fat Northern Ireland cunt who is a dickhead in real life' didn't just laugh at it he 'had' to say "it's not lads you are getting them out for it's women" ... aye whatever, just laugh ya twat it was funny. Watch it, it'll will explain what I want to get out there and may make you think ..... something that daytime TV is not known for.

Is Miss Greece 2010 hawt or nat!

Any excuse to post about my favourite topic

Old Knudsen likes shaved arm pits on weemen and soft smooth legs cos weemen should be what men are not, soft and smooth. Boobies are not hairy and I LOVE the boobies.

I like weemen to have a hairy muff but for the love of Gog trim it a little. 

Why do we like weemen shaved? It's because pedos have run the world for centuries, also back in the day fucking whatever was acceptable.  The leap to finding children sexy to some is still a short one reinforced by society norms.

 

Sexualising  children is fucking disgusting, dressing them up as tramps, dancing to Single ladies is wrong on so many levels. Just put yer child on sellyerkidtopedos.com and be done with it. 

Nice and hairless like a child ..... shaven twats make Old Knudsen think about this and kills his mood. Shaven cunts are fucking itchy, seeing a woman getting stuck in there is as unsexy as seeing a man getting stuck into scratching his sweaty balls..... well I don't find that sexy, pulling out wedgies is hot though, especially if skid marks are involved. 

Muff Pubes aid with the friction of sex and so are a little more important than armpits. 

Madonna was hot in the 80's for five minutes until I saw her pits.     

This subject conflicts Old Knudsen because weemen shave and put make up on because society have told them that is what you should be doing. Aye they may say "I do it for myself" but thats because they are conditioned to do it and are used to it .... Gog forbid you'd incur the wrath of peer pressure when 50 year old barbie doll look a likes sneer doon their noses at you.   My man likes me this way .... funny since you've never asked him.  

Yes I'm sure he really wants yer finger nails as long and useless as that because he loves to think about the dirt and germs you harbor under them while you cook his dinner that has to be on the table by 6pm.  

Nails long enough to scratch backs during sex but short enough to clean the shit out of when you wipe yer arse.  

At the same time Old Knudsen likes armless arm pits and legs and to give yer minge a hair cut. A short back and sides not a landing strip or tiny soul patch. 

You should be able to do what the fuck you want with yer own body but if you can't sell yer body (or parts) kill yer body when you please, eat trans fats or have whatever medical procedure you want then you are in no way free. If the law don't get you then peer pressure of what is socially acceptable will. 

If you don't shave then fine, Old Knudsen may still tap you after a few drinks, don't worry fat chicks,  chicks with dicks and makeup less ladies you are in Old Knudsen's sights drunk or sober or high cos he ain't that shallow. 

If you love someone already and they decide to go hairy then I doubt THAT will make you love them any less but if it's someone you don't know, well no one is forcing you to ask them out. 

  

Halloweener

No matter how many of them you see or hear, no matter how many strange things that you capture on film ..... Ghosties do not exist.

Ghoulies aren't real either.

Until you get kicked in them and then they are oh so real.

As for long legged beasties ......

You decide.

Hairy Koreans

As if Koreans don't all look alike anyway. Kim Jong-un has set doon specific hair styles for men and weemen. The people not only have to deal with hunger, cannibalism and threats of war against the US and South Korea but now they have to make sure they have haircuts from the 1950's too. Let me ask you something Kim, did you get a free pair of gunties with yer haircut? cos it makes you look like a cunt.  

The stylist mullet is not on the approved hair style list. Their loss.