Kanye West The New Messiah?

Ken Naughton had won 2 tickets to a Kanye West concert, he wasn't very keen on going but his mother who is a big fan insisted. "I wasn't too fused really, I prefer the likes of One direction, The Vamps and of course J Cats, it was me mum who wanted to go."  

Because Naughton has been in a wheelchair for most of his adult due to severe obesity apathetic syndrome he doesn't get out much. Rolling doon to their local KFC every day and then over to the chinkies later on is about it. His only friends are pizza delivery drivers.

 If he is the new Messiah should we not then torture him and nail him to a cross?

While singing his jaunty hit song Good Life, West told the whole crowd to get up and dance. West who describes himself as a married, Christian man with a family stood on stage refusing to continue until everyone had risen. 

Naughton who was feeling slightly uncomfortable as the other fans glared at him was encouraged to stand by his mother who said, "I knew you'd spoil this for me, you've spoiled my whole life even since that day you came crawling out of me tutting and rolling your eyes and going through my purse for money."   

All of a sudden he felt a warm wet sensation, "It must have been a Kanye West miracle cos I was out of me chair body popping away."   

Kanye West has performed other miracles in his time such as turning ego into a career and fathering a child without ever having sex. The rapper later commented, "Disabled people are lazy ... far worse than any brother and that's saying something, you just have to give them encouragement straight from God."   

Did this miracle make a fan of Naughton? After having recovered from a suspected heart attack he said that the concert was rather naff but ok cos it was free.   

 After all these long-ass verses

I'm tired, you tired, Jesus wept.

It Ain't Over Til The Fat Lady Pleads

Karen Ferguson a 700-pound woman (Texas of course) who pleaded for help finding health care on TV got a local rehabilitation clinic accepted her case.

It seems that going on the telly is the only way to gets things in this cuntry as she has been turned doon by nursing homes because of a problem with her insurance. She has diabetes and bed sores and hasn't left her trailer home in a year, let me guess its a double wide.

She expressed her fears of remaining bed-ridden for the rest of her life as her bed sores fester and her body deteriorates but doesn't do anything about it.

"That's the worst thing I could ever imagine," Ferguson said

A couple of years ago when she was a sprightly 300lbs she had open heart surgery. Why bother I ask?

That is the story and now what Old Knudsen thinks and what you should also think .

First of all Texas, WTF? is wrong with that place? Does the government do secret mong experiments on Texas and Florida by spraying the air or infecting the water ?

The left-wing touchy feely people who say you shouldn't racially profile and think alcoholism, drug and sex addiction are illnesses probably think this is an illness too. Those poor smokers and their cancers, they give those who get cancer the honest way a bad name.

Then in that same vein of reasoning we can call Hitler's genocide of the jews, gheys and tinkers etc an illness so therefore he is not to be held accountable. He needed Prozac for his superiority complex.

No one should be held accountable for their actions in case its an illness. "Please help me my liver is dying due to years of drinking" och poor man no wonder he couldn't afford child support he had an illness.

I accept lack of self respect and maybe depression would get you to 700 lbs. It has never got Old Knudsen to 700 lbs maybe he isn't ill enough or maybe he just isn't a big fat lazy cunt.

Kill yerself with eating sure but I don't want to see the rolls of fat or the resources yer using up. Ferguson's ankles cannot support her weight therefore she should be left for the wolves as she rolls around like a turtle on its back.


Who is giving these lazy fuckers food? a year of dieting might do you good, c'mon if you don't like healthy eating and small portions get up and do something about it, oh thats right you can't even use the shitter.

Her age was never mentioned nor were her family so I suspect this story that is being presented as a sad tale is really a fat tale of enabling and guilt.

Is it love to enable these people and feed them Happy meals all day long because that is what they want?

To Old Knudsen this kind of life seems to be the American dream.

If you really hate yerself then kill yerself in a faster way and stop making the rest of us suffer, do yer family want to wipe yer arse and under yer fat rolls ?

What does she offer her family who feed her KFC bargain buckets? moral support? is she funny as fuck? does she wash the dishes?

I'm seen plenty of this shit in real life, a low education level and I bet she gets a nice wee pension or disability income because she has medical problems due to being fat. I also bet she has a car that she can no longer use and so it makes sense her son or daughter uses it.

I bet she has friends and family that think plaid shirts and combing yer mullet is dressing up.

Old Knudsen has no sympathy for those who let themselves go to the level of being useless and refuse to educate yerself because you didn't like school and blame everyone but yerself . If you can't respect yerself then how can I?

Am I being harsh on fat fucks , mongs, drunkards and druggies? What about those poor pedos that were abused as kids and so feel they must abuse too?

For fuck sake its yer choice and you reap what you sow it isn't rocket science. action re-action.





If Old Knudsen dusted off his Heckler & Koch MSG90A1 with scope that so happens to be

Old Knudsen's weapon of the day

and went out and shot all those fuckers that annoy him a SWAT team may be called and while Old Knudsen would take a few doon with him he may be fatally shot.

While many would applaud the latter part Old Knudsen has not accomplished many of his dreams . Yes they do include Gerard Butler, Donn, Rachel McAdams along with many more also rope, privacy and duct tape.

So Old Knudsen can see if he did this what would happen so therefore won't be doing it until his dreams are completed .

Consider this an uplifting learning post.



Latest OBB News Up-Dates

Star-vation Salvation Salivation

I always got pissed off at Bob Geldoff after our money for Africa, what am I a cash machine? The people of the UK had millions gathered and sent within hours of hearing about the Asian tsunami, as nice as that is its not right that the governments of the world still years after haven't fulfilled their pledges............. old news.

I've heard a lot in the news about world wide famine and food shortages. You know me I cut through the hype and the bullshit and look at my watch and say, "must be time to scare the public again." We've done several pandemics that include flu and aids then theres terrorists, mad cows, birds with colds, cancer from mobile phones, coffee and not paying taxes, Global warming, Global ice-age, meteors, Commies, El Nino and you know what? I don't believe in most of it or give a shit.

If it happens then its the will of God so deal with it and go talk to him at a church if hes got the balls to show his face there.

That explains where the fuck my flying cars of the future are.

Growing corn for fuel what a fucked up idea nearly as stupid as those curly energy saving light bulbs that can cause migraines and contain enough mercury to be a health hazzard if they break.

Why do 3rd world cuntries want to grow corn and continue to grow the opium poppy? because its a better return for their money and less effort than growing food crops.
Even as the media focuses on little black babies with flies around their heads dying of hunger what are the real reasons for world hunger ?

There is an abundance of food in the world not scarcity. Enough food is available to provide at least 4.3 pounds of food per person a day worldwide­ enough to make most people fat.

The reason why they aren't getting their bellies full is because they are poor, even the so-called 'hungry countries' have enough food to feed their people but rather than feed the poor to which there is no profit they export it.

To be honest what do we know about hunger anyway? ever hear someone say, "I'm starving" because they haven't ate in 4 hours? or even "starving to death" that's like when they say they are "dying with a cold".

I haven't been hungry and without money for more food since my youth, it was scary but nothing like the desperation seen in refugee camps in Africa.



Typical Blogger, looks quite similar to me actually around the nipples. This lass has one hot sex blog.

You can blame nature for famine if you want it isn't going to take offense, food is always available for those who can afford it.

Many people live on the brink of starvation and a natural disaster only draws attention to their plight when they get pushed over the brink.
In cities across the world many homeless die from the cold every winter, is that the fault of the weather or society for not putting them into labour camps?



Don't worry folks we're winning the war or is it two wars?

Over population isn't a valid excuse either, sometimes I feel from the media that the world is full up on every possible space by people.

For every Bangladesh, a densely populated and a hungry country, we find a Nigeria, Brazil or Bolivia, where abundant food resources coexist with hunger.

In Europe the population is decreasing but they still have hunger as found out by all the immigrants even though food is still exported in a major way.

In many rapidly expanding countries like China or India you'll find the most hungry are weemen and children as they are less valued by the cultures itself especially girl children.

What the fuck is 'Free Trade' I'll tell ya what, that means poor countries can make money with exports and workers who work for less with little standards or choice. Send food to feed the livestock of richer cuntries while yers starves.

People will feed themselves if allowed to. Governments, large corporations and the World bank create obstacles that prevent them from doing so.

Do skinny dying Africans want to be on the BBC news choking on a cup full of watery rice while you sit in front of the telly having yer dinner?

The aid agencies struggle to feed the hungry now, the food shortages will finish many of them off that's for sure but will our fat bellies be effected? nope just our wallets as the price goes up, people will complain as they do the cost of cigarettes and petrol but they will still buy it and still get fat.

Third world hunger means a cheaper work force hungry to have yer job out-sourced to them, then buying cigarettes becomes a struggle and you can only drink once a week instead of twice.

It all comes doon to money and honest people in governments to distribute the food and make sure the local warlord doesn't just take it to feed his troops who are allegedly fighting for the people.

I never understood businesses that don't value or appreciate their workers and treat them like shit cos that builds up grievances and they make it their job to pay their wealthy bosses back instead of loyalty.

Its the same as countries chipping away at the poor and hoping they will just die instead of helping them help their selves which will then help the country.

Knowledge is power so education and training should be paramount and incentives to stay in yer community. Give hungry farmers plots of land to work and the ripple effect will grow from there.

Why is this cunt so fat? did a skinny person bite him as a child? do I see a food shortage in his future?

Reducing the importance of politics and religion is also a key, how much is spent on giant stadium churches or campaigns just to see which candidate from the same party at each others throats will go for president ? its just so ridiculous.

Latest OBB News Up-Dates

Most Britons Could Be Obese by 2050

I'm fat but ya still want a taste of me Fatty Arbuckle. Call me a fat fucker if ya want, I can diet but you'll still be ugly.

I think it will happen in the next 10 years as we are well catching up on America, the country that saved us from the Hun only to make us fat and apathetic. (no offense to the fat apathetic Yanks) and I'm a bit of a chubby chaser anyway.

It took 250 experts over two years to come to the conclusion that fast food and lack of exercise will make the British fat. Experts in what? I want to see their time sheets and see what the cunts have been doing for 2 years, did ya clock out for lunch? how many sick days did ya have? when I worked for Tillyman's fish and chip shop I never took one sick day in the whole seven years I worked there, not even when I had pubic lice or leprosy, people all insisted that I should go to a doctor but I said "no, doctors are for the weak."

60 percent of men, 50 percent of women and a quarter of children and young people would be obese by 2050. I take it the non-fat people will be the ones with the eating disorders who work in the entertainment industry.

The government has pledged to draw up new plans to combat bulging waistlines, obesity problems costs Britain 45 billion pounds a year in healthcare, instead of treating fat fuckers wire their gobs shut and sign them up for a gym or send them out to dig ditches, 100 years ago there were hardly any fat people, bring back the days of poor nutrition and hard work, just look at the films from then, no gangs of chavs and people walked faster, they weren't happy but oh they were grateful for what they got.

Well don't worry, the International Obesity TaskForce have promised to respond rapidly and decisively....... After lunch.

I may have packed on a few pounds over the weekend, water retention and I'm big boned, especially in me arse, I will not be attacked rapidly or decisively. I shall sue those fat experts, the task force and the government for discrimination against fat people, then I shall get lipo and a tummy tuck as a gym sounds like hard work and it smells.

Why Are Idiots Allowed To Breed?

I have long stated that Britain is becoming more like America each day. No you arrogant yanks that's not a compliment. As well as being populated by a low class of poorly educated aggressive morons with a sense of self entitlement we're all going to be big fat fuckers that sues everyone and hates immigrants.

Here is Connor McCreaddie an 8-year-old boy who weighs 218 pounds, the authorities are investigating whether or not his parents are guilty of child abuse. As well as missing doctor appointments they allow him to eat every 20 minutes, the mother sort of shrugs and says if he doesn't get enough food he goes and steals it from the cupboard. I think the parents are guilty of being stupid.

The doctors are looking for some medical reason why Connor would be a big fat fucker, if they wanted my medical opinion I'd say because he is allowed to eat too much but what do I know?
It reminds me of the Yanks with their foo foo dogs that are brought to dog nutritionists to help them lose weight, stop fucking feeding them and they'll lose weight how about that for an idea?
Its this kind of bad parenting that turns countries stupid, Mrs McCreaddie, don't buy so much shitty food and put a lock on yer fridge door, I suspect little Connor will whine like a bitch but he'll shed the pounds.
Maybe he is better off in protective custody, would you want to be around him when hes hungry?
If things don't improve he'll die by the age of 30.

A fat fucker, the way to do it is get fat when you're older so you only have yer self to blame so you can wallow in yer own gravy, "nobody loves me because I'm fat, the only thing that makes me feel better is donuts".................... future winner of the Darwin award I'm sure.





We here at old Bitter Balls fully realise that around 85% of our readers are American, if we have offended any members of that fine nation then we .............. A. have done our job well B. have no real opinion C. will slag you off till the cows cum home and still expect you to defend us from the nazis.