Lick It Then Swallow For About Six Dollars

Here is a message to the Americans in general. You have 4 of yer earth hours to surrender....... oops wrong message . Every time you mention a capitol city on the telly you have to say the cuntry too.

London - England.

Yes Old Knudsen knows there are other Londons out there but not ones founded in 47 AD (after dinner) by the Romans and called Londinium but ones named after London formerly Londinium, like aluminum but spelled aluminium which we all know is the proper fucking fucker way .

If the telly says London then it obviously means England. When Hitler said "Go bomb the fuck out of London" the Luftwaffen didn't bomb Canada. When James Bond books a flight to London they don't say, "Is that London in Ohio?"

If you name a London on the telly its the London in England unless its one of the lesser ones, right? Jellied eels, red double deckers, colourful cockneys, Big fucking Ben and loads of wogs.

Remember so as to not confuse people the town of Derry in Norn iron you need to call it by its proper name not, Free Derry, Taig Derry, Derry the town of rapes and murders or just Derry. You must call it Londonderry its the law. Also you don't want to insult anyone, its all politics just trust me on this one.

If you search for Paris you have to be careful.


Do you want to end up with Paris Hilton in the Carl's Jr commercial ? or do you want to end up in Paris France? no fucking way its obvious its Paris, Texas cos its all about Texas, the whole world revolves around that idiot inbred state. Like Florida but with cowboy hats.

For others not in Callyfornia Carl's Jr is an American fast-food restaurant chain that is also in Mexico and Canada now I believe. Its America's #4 after M'Donald's, Burger king and Wendys. I never heard of it in fact I had never heard of Wendys until the mid 90's.

They used to have some bloke eating a burger all doon his chin but thankfully with the exception of Hilton they usually have a hot chick eating them now.


Eat it bitch eat it! er sorry I get a little excited when I see a hot woman who can speak 5 languages have oral sex with a burger.

They had a chick on a mechanical horse eating while the horse bucked around, her hips writhing in motion with burger being sexily ate, as soon as the music for that ad came on my 4 hour erection came on too. In fact if I ever hear the song it jumps up like Pavel's dog, it may even lick yer face.


There is an ad with a doctor who loves bourbon and obsesses about it before surgeries, during surgeries and just about every minute of the day, he just isn't right without a bourbon. It turns out to be a double Kentucky bourbon burger he is talking about. In real life he may be eating the burger but he'd also be pished as a newt from a liquid lunch, you know surgeons they do what they like.


Now they have some well formed woman from some MTV show eating what she calls her bikini burger. Not quite Padma Lakshmi or the bronco but at least it doesn't make me throw up like Hilton with her stick like 'Thats hot' pseudo sexiness.

Audrina Patridge the current chick may call it the bikini burger but she doesn't mention throwing it up later in order to stay in her bikini.

Take A Chill Pill Mohammad.

Ah true love conquers all, that and millions of pounds. Can ya picture them having sex? disgusting isn't it?

Salman Rushdie who was famous for writing The Satanic Verses in 1988 which describes a cosmic battle between good and evil and combines fantasy, philosophy and farce with lots of tits and Islamic hand jobs which also pissed off the Iranians enough to issue a Fatwa on him and then he........ I don't know, what else has he done? oh yeah he married that honey Padma Lakshmi as shown in the picture above giving rich ugly fuckers all over world hope.

Well for his services to literature and to annoy the Ragheads he was given a Knighthood. Probably an idea from his hot young wife to use him as bait to flush out Islamic Extremists, a very helpful and succulently moist gurl, God bless her .

Pakistan's Religious Affairs Minister Ejaz-ul-Haq and promoter of Islam as a religion of peace said in response to the Knighthood.
"If someone commits suicide bombing to protect the honour of the Prophet Mohammad, his act is justified,"

Pakistan's National Assembly unanimously condemned Britain's award of a knighthood and demanded it be withdrawn and if they don't then all Muslim countries should break off diplomatic relations with the UK. Fuck will that hurt our feelings.

Sir Rushdie commented about the situation saying," who gives a fuck ? just look at how hot my wife is" he then smiled and grabbed her arse, she squirmed uncomfortably.

Indian supermodel ,actress and award-winning cookbook author, her first name means Lotus in Sanskrit and Lakshmi is the name of the Hindu goddess of wealth. A fucking Hindu, just goes to show you that no one is perfect. It may be fun to convert her except after Rushdie shes probably converted to a leezer.

I have no idea why he got this, give it to Tom Clancy, he may be a Yank but what talent, that should piss off the Ragheads too.
Things like this show you who the pretend friends to the West are, " we are doing all we can to hunt doon Al Qaeda, well except for looking for them as they are our mates after all."

I haven't read the Satanic Verses, Rushdie is as ugly as Stephen King so therefore I have no interest in what he has to say, studies show that good looking people like me deserve the most attention, thank god for Blogs so you ugly fuckers out there get to talk to the likes of me.

So Islam are ya listening? the Prophet Mohammad is a big child molesting dog licker with a small penis, his premature ejaculation and inability to sexually satisfy a woman has turned him against all weemen and he is now a hateful, twisted individual who can only get his way with brute force and stupidity, he was doon the town the other night talking shit to Jesus and when Jesus lifted his hand to brush his long hair, Mohammad thought he was going to hit him and started crying,"don't hit me please, for I am a craven coward" did ya get that?

Ok Mrs Queen, crown me, c'mon knight me up cos boy would that piss off the Sandsavages. What not enough? Mohammad is so ugly when he joined an ugly contest, they said "Sorry, no professionals, when he walks into a bank, they turn off the surveillance cameras, his ma had to be drunk to breast feed him.

Here is Padma Lakshmi wife of Salmon Rushdie in case you missed her the other two times, did I mention she can speak 5 languages?

If this post offends any Muslims I just want to say, tough shit ya should all be protestants anyway so get over it, and stop blowing yerselves up you stupid cunts, at least the IRA only lost the odd finger, fucking amateurs.