Jeremy Corbyn Sexy Mother Hugger

Back in the day while protesting against Tory genetic experiments on the poor

Labour leader Jeremy Corbyn wants to be the next Prime Minister of Used to be Great Britain. Old Knudsen knows the people won't vote him into number 10 because everyone is into Nazis and throwing your vote away protest votes ... also yer fucken stupid and fall for the Conservative shit 9 times out of 10.

I don't know what the fuck is wrong with you people you can't do anything right.

We know that Corbyn may be an idealist but going by his track record we can see he is a good man.

That's not enough for some. Oh woe is me people lie to me and fuck me over ... I had better vote for them then.

Corbyn has defied his own party over 500 times, a true rebel, he's fucken anti-establishment not Farage or Trump.

He's campaigned for human rights worldwide and against austerity in the UK. If something is wrong you protest it you don't say 'well that's just Jew stuff, Refugee stuff, African stuff' ... it's fucken HUMAN stuff.  

He was anti-Apartheid and getting arrested for it, he wanted to bring Margaret Thatcher's friend, Chilean dictator Pinochet to justice, he went against the Tories and voted for LGBT rights, supported the miners when the Tories were setting out to destroy their lives, jobs and communities ... the Tories did have a hit list and a plan to get em, it wasn't a made up conspiracy. 

He spoke out about the UK & other western governments selling weapons to Saddam in the 70's and 80's and protested when he used those weapons to kill loads of Iraqi Kurds.

He supported the Birmingham Six and Guildford Four in wrongful convictions which were were eventually quashed.

He voted against tuition fees, ID cards and dodgy Tory spending plans that would have cost the tax payer 10 billion a year. He has protested against costly and quite obsolete nukes. 

He brought the Fenian cocksuckers of the IRA in to talk out peace before it was a thing and has supported cocksucking Palestine over the years. It takes more bravery to talk peace with your enemies than to fight them. 

He saw through the Bush and Blair bullshit on Afghanistan and Iraq invasions after 9/11. 

 With Ed Sheeran from Simply Red

If constantly being on the right side of history isn't enough then I am here to show the werld the hidden side of Jeremy Corbyn. He has thrown up at more celeb parties than you've had hot dinners ... it doesn't get much more British an patriotic than that.

While he votes against illegal wars, selling arms to the rag heads and bombing shit he isn't a pacifist. He prefers to fuck people up for sport. He currently holds the over 60's cage fighting werld champion belt. He beat 85 year-old Jim Benson in November of last year to win the title. Jim was in a right fucked up state and had to be put down but a win is a win. Corbyn didn't come away unscathed, he sliced a bit of skin from his hand from Jim's wheel chair.

Corbyn is all hood. When his son got mugged by a moped thief in his Islington constituency Corbyn was furious, he beat the hoes and the street snitches until he caught them and said "you come onto my turf and disrespect my blood, I'm gonna make sure you NEVER do this again" he exacted street justice by letting the air out of his moped tyres. Corbyn has been sanctioned 43 times by his own party for flashing gang signs in party conference photos. 

He didn't choose the socialist life  ... it chose him . 

Real fur but the animal died of old age ... word!

Corbyn is a down to earth, real bloke and like the rest of us he has his peeps, his crew. In true socialist style they share everything ... in fact it's fucken disgusting at times. Frankie on the left and Lennon on the right are his gender neutral friends with an attitude. 

An avid Satanist he turned his coven to the vegetarian option for sacrifice and now they only sacrifice the likes of a bunch of Kale. The real winner is the Dark Lord whose blood pressure is way down and his poops are quite firm and regular. Hail Satan!    

Old men in caps have been sexy for some time now. Old Knudsen knows that being a decent bloke with a solid track record for doing the right thing won't matter to many, they fear that because they are used to snobby entitled toffs shitting on them from number 10 with the number twos. A decent bloke makes them look inwards at themselves and their petty shame is revealed. 

It was far easier to kick the vulnerable because, hey, everyone else was doing it. Nazi is not the cool thing right now and never has been. 

The Tories count on you being weak and voting for the familiar abuse because once they win, that Theresa May hag will use that win as 'the will of the people' to inflict whatever they want upon us. 

She uses Brexit as the will of the people but Old Knudsen is a person and he didn't vote for it. Do not mistake majority for truth. It was not the will of many of the people.

To be fair Old Knudsen must give the Tories some blog space too so you can fairly make up yer crack addled mind as to who to vote for and who is bitter better. 

 
  

Jeremy Corbyn The Next Prime Minister

Nothing Jeremy Corbyn likes better than to ride his bike on the open roads

You may have heard that there is going to be a General Election in Britain in June. Cos we aren't sick of voting and fucking things up eh? The last election had voters for the opposition party (Labour) doing a protest vote or not voting because they thought the then Labour leader Edward Miliband was weak. 

Yeah that showed them, voting Green or not voting gave the election to the Tories, well done you smart fucking arseholes. 

Labour scrambled to change and got Jeremy Corbyn as the new leader. 

 Making socks and sandals cool

Old Knudsen's take on him is that he's an idealist, a dreamer with his ideas not based on reality. He is anti-establishment, Trump and Farage were also called that but they weren't really. Corbyn has been compared to Bernie Sanders and yes if Sanders was less intelligent and less lovable they would be very similar.

He always looks like he's about to say "get off my lawn"

In his early days Corbyn was a vice-chairman for CND, if you remember the 80's you'd remember all those CND hippies at Greenham Common protesting the American Cruise Missiles there. Corbyn would like to the UK to get rid of all its nukes and the obsolete Trident submarine program. If we play dead, don't back up our allies then Russia will never attack us .... he wants out of NATO too. 

Old Knudsen thinks it's ok to have some nukes as a deterrent but not to go nuts like the US. Corbyn has also said he'd like us not to need an army ... why say stupid things like that? I'd like pedos and rapists to stop doing their thing but that ain't gonna happen. We will always need an army, navy and air force cos people are cunts. 

      On his real bike that he's named ... The Destroyer! no not really probably Derek or Mable

He says he isn't a pacifist ... yeah right but voted against the Iraq war and against Syrian airstrikes. It would be good if he could accept how things are and adapt. He thinks he can reason with ISIS and achieve a political peace for fucks sake. Cos religious fanatics are always so easy to reason with

 

Bill Nye the science guy with Creationist and evolution denier Ken Ham

He is against austerity and would like to all those services that were sold off to be returned to the public. He also wants dentists to work for the NHS rather than private firms. 

He fought off two rebellions in his own party. Many in the Labour Party don't agree with him and have tried to oust him. Some of his leftist ideas were too leftist even for socialist Labour.

He has told other politicians to wise up when they attacked him for his scruffy appearance and has refused to sing God save the Queen. He a vegetarian who is more spiritual than religious ... oh so many red flags. 

He's sympathized with terrorists when it wasn't trendy to and all that is scary and shows a lack of judgement especially 5 days after a bombing they just carried out. 

 As like Sanders he has walked the walk

Lets hope that June be the end of May ... Theresa May but if she had thought she would lose she wouldn't have called an election.

The Labour Party is squabbling and keep resigning. Corbyn is weak, vague and seems like he's not fully on board with things. To woo the voter they announced that there should be 4 extra Bank Holidays than there are ... what? Not really a game changer since the Tories have promised free Big Macs money off yer next shop at Tesco. 

Already the fuckwits that voted Green the last time are looking towards the Lib Dems ... so much fail. 

Old Knudsen personally doesn't like Corbyn but he also doesn't like May and the Tories are rightly fucking up this cuntry. Anyone else in the campaign doesn't matter and you are only fooling yourself with other parties. 

Corbyn needs to pull his lazy hippy finger out. A charm offensive. He needs to support the armed forces and police. He needs to talk tough about things and not just what the Tories are up to and he needs cool soundbites that will be repeated. He needs to show the NHS that he has their back. He needs to go to those things that Brits hold dear and show that he loves them too. 

At the moment he's too distant and bleh. He needs photo ops showing him having fun. Yeah reading to kids and breaking some eggs ... very nice and tame, he needs to show he can break heads too. 

 Not the manhole cover you were looking for

May went hiking, he needs to go abseiling .... with mountain rescue or something. The man takes pictures of man hole covers for fucks sake he needs an image make over or you might as well not bother with the election. He's coming up to his 68th birthday 4 days after Old Knudsen's, he needs to show the werld he isn't fucken dead yet. 

He is famous for not spending money but get him to splash out on something nerdy, perhaps he can pretend to like Star Wars or something, he needs to look human and be seen having fun. 

 He can smile

Old Knudsen was wrong about Trump winning and he had hoped his fellow Brit would vote to remain in the EU and to not be bigoted cunts so on my losing streak I'm predicting a Tory win because Labour, nay Corbyn cannot promote himself and there is more to slag the old fart off over than there is to like him for. 

In June vote Labour, because it isn't Conservative and for fucks sake don't throw yer vote away by being clever or tactical.     

Erdogan Has Been Expecting You

President of Turkey Tayyip Erdogan has been getting on like a right old Bond villain. I don't mean the 50,000 people that have been rounded up during a made up suspicious coup attempt last year including 2,839 soldiers, 99 of them Generals or the 2,745 judges, political rivals and media.  

Erdogan is fucken paranoid and blames Islamic cleric Fethullah Gulen who is in self-imposed exile in Pennsyvlania. He has demanded that the US hands him over but doesn't give them any proof of guilt ... that's what people do now, they blame someone without evidence and hope that their outrage is enough.

Even though Erdogan is cementing his power by using the excuse of the coup to get rid of all opposition he is holding a referendum that will give him even more power. He has said he wants a system in place that is closer to what the US has. What a scary concept that the US system is the system of choice for tyrants.

There are vast numbers of Turkish ex-pats in Germany and the Netherlands and he wanted to hold rallies for them to secure their support. The German and Dutch governments have problems with far right groups and the last thing they want is thousands of hyped up Muslims in the streets, it's all kinds of bad for them.
They both turned down Foreign Minister Mevlut Cavusoglu to hold rallies to which he described the Netherlands as the "capital of fascism."  

Erdogan has called both Germany and the Netherlands "Nazis" which is pretty rich coming from him. 

And look who he's become besties with. They met in January and again a few days ago. No wonder he was saying to the Netherlands that he'll teach them about democracy. Russia knows all about western democracy. 

Funny that Erdogan and Putin suddenly became buds a month after the assassination of Russia's ambassador to Turkey. The assassin had been a part of the security detail for Turkish President Recep Tayyip Erdogan on eight occasions ... Coincidence I'm sure.  


Russia has lifted many sanctions from Turkey that it had imposed after Turkey shot down a Russian jet on the Syrian border. This new era of friendship is strange and out of character, almost as if they've started to align for greater power to carve up the Middle East along with Iran. 

There are US bases in Turkey and while Erdogan tends to play all sides he keeps leaning towards kicking the Americans out. Then again overseas military bases are always a great source to get intel from, oh those lonely service personnel.  

Turkey can do fuck all to the Netherlands but Russia is a cert to meddle in their elections . Geert Wilders wants to make the Netherlands great again. They will also meddle in the French and German elections soon. 

You may see a lone gunman taking out a Dutch diplomat or something though, claiming it's for disrespect against Turkey.