Showing posts with label burma. Show all posts
Showing posts with label burma. Show all posts

Wednesday, 3 October 2007

What Would My Click Next Bloggers Do?

You have no idea what its like to be me, the outlandish claims people make about me and the constant harassment I receive , then theres the death threats and the crank phone calls which I do promise to stop soon.

I finally found my book of Green Shield stamps, not like any of yous know what they are , I dropped one of me pain killers doon the side of the sofa and those are good wee tablets so I went doon after it, my hand was bitten twice I found the hamster I owned in the 80's and I found my book of 500 Green Shield stamps, I had dreamed about the goods I could redeem my book for and then it went missing. I sat there looking at the useless book wondering if I could get anything for them then I got a phone call from the Burmese foreign minister asking if I was still boycotting Burma.
I was cagey and didn't give a straight answer, like a politician I was, I said, " the question is not am I boycotting Burma but what are the full implications to world trade and boys in cots?" people have always told me I should have been a politician or a Lawyer but I'd say I couldn't as my parents were married.

Even though I have incited monks to riot and put a hex on General Than Shwe would I be interested in a job? well my Protestant work ethic doesn't give me the luxury of turning doon jobs so I maybe starting right away as head monk interrogator, not sure what my work duties would be but I get to meet lots of interesting people and the pay is good.

I asked a fellow blogger a question which I thought was a no brainer but their answer surprised me so I'm asking anyone else the same thing, don't weasel around the scenario just answer it if you are inclined to do so. I am interested in hearing yer answer.

There is a Hitler figure and you have full knowledge that they are about to commit genocide on a scale bigger than the holocaust, 12 million people are going to die, they may very well include those you care for.
You are the only one that can stop it, you have to kill the future Hitler.

You won't be punished for killing him.

Will you pick up the handgun and put two in the chest and one in the head of this Hitler or will you let 12 million people die?

Monday, 24 September 2007

The World Is Not Enough.


Once a man of dignity, a warrior poet with the heart of a lion and the balls of a baboon, who has served his cuntry (and a few others thanks to the CIA) well, who lost his leg to the Great white panda of the Pennine mountains now standing in his unmentionables like some common criminal, lucky they were clean on me last month.

First of all airport security is fucking shite, do I look like a crazy Islamer ? four hours they had me in there for asking me questions wondering why I was so keen to have my cavity searched they suspected I had a booby trap stuck up there while in reality I just enjoy it, lucky they didn't take my leg off, full of cocaine it is, my end of the world stash.

I went over to Columbia University in New York to protest the fact that Mahmoud Ahmadinejad is a cunt , my placard said "you are a cunt!" I've used it for many different people over the years. I couldn't get in to see him so I said a quick prayer for those caught up in the Columbia High School massacre of 1999 and kept an eye out for Colombian drug lords as I dipped into me stash of the Devil's dandruff over the Atlantic, flying makes me edgy as planes are way too heavy to be up in the sky like that.

A lot of people have said Mahmoud shouldn't have been invited to the university because of his opinions (no free speech for Johnny Sand Savage) but the Professors were right to do so because Mahmoud is a fucking nutcase and the more we can draw out of him the better we can second guess his moves, oh and demonize him and his country more . Friends close and enemies closer sort of thing . I give it within a year for the US goes to war with Iran.

They set up a big telly for us to watch Mahmoud on, the fucker can't even speak English why are we even paying attention to him? a savage with a PHD in Highways and Traffic, in other words a PHD in scratching yer arse, too lazy to learn the tongue that Jesus spoke, I didn't even stay for the second half.

I was off again to Rangoon to see my old muckers from the monastery. Years back I became a Buddhist monk in Burma as I thought it would get me the weemen.



I didn't look too good back then, I blame the diet of rice and pish we ate every day.

In my November 2006 post I had boycotted Burma and put General Than Shwe on notice, now with numerous e-mails I had finally got the monks pissed off enough to protest and we are getting somewhere. I was there marching with my brothers in the rain, I tried to get some of them to set themselves on fire but they weren't having any of it.

Well I'm jet lagged and on a bit of a dooner, its tough being an international trouble maker er I mean shooter.

In the first picture aren't you reminded of 'A street car named Desire?' "Stella!" "Stella!" "Where the fuck for art my dog?"