The Chicken Was The Racist

The world is crazy, you have the over politically correct people spoiling everything by taking offense on behalf of minorities and you have the speak their mind people who rebel against political correctness but end up looking like racist assholes in the process.

Old Knudsen just wants to tell a joke without offending those people ... you know who I mean. You can't body shame a fat person unless it's Trump or something. This shows you that everyone has their line in the sand and their own set of double standards.

Double standards are quite complex. Kirk and Bones tried to explain to Spock that you can admire someone but not agree with what they did. Khan was a genocidal maniac but hey he made the space trains run on time.

Whitewashing doesn't just mean to paint yer fence white or to cover up crimes. It also means movie and TV roles that were originally ethnic going white people.

We just had the whole Danny Rand Iron fist should have been made Asian crap. Yes, decades of having a white blue eyed dude doing martial arts so lets make him Asian .... then you'd have the oh that's a stereotype that all Asians know martial arts ARGHHHHH!!!!!!

Danny Rand is from a wealthy white family, you could go with adoption but why? You want diversity? he teams up with black dude Luke Cage in the comics and soon in the Marvel TV show The Defenders.

The hot and very badass Jessica Henwick is in Iron Fist, certainly not as a token Asian. Due to Rand being white like he always has been the PC critics savaged the show on the first ep. Old Knudsen has watched season one and it is fucken awesome, way better than Dare Devil.

  I don't want to hurt you but if you push me I will fuck you up

Kung Fu had the similar issues as Iron Fist had but in the 70's. A half Chinese character played by a white guy. That show did give steady employment to Asian actors at a time when not many did.  

John Wayne as Genghis Khan and Mickey Rooney as Mr Yunioshi in Breakfast At Tiffany’s. Hollywood has had a history of acceptable, casual racism.

Dances with wolves had Native American actors rather than a white dude in brown face. Kevin Costner isn't the greatest of actors but did no one think to give the Injuns a few lessons? I like Graham Greene but he has the acting range of a John Wayne or Clint Eastwood ... not extensive. 

Hollywood just jumps the shark when it comes to casting now. Emma Stone a half-Chinese, half-Hawaiian ... in what universe? Instead of being Asian, Tilda Swinton in Dr Strange became an ancient baldy Celt. While Swinton sounds like an upper class English person her family tree does have ancient Scots roots so close enough.  

The Martian got rid of its Asian characters but it had one black dude so that is ok. If anyone is important enough to risk it all and save from Mars it's Matt fucken Damon. All those movies like Star Wars and Star Trek had a few tokens but zero Hispanics .... where is their outrage? It wasn't until the Battlestar Galactica reboot that we had wet backs in space.  Ay caramba, shields down to 40%. 

Marvel did make Heimdall black, cos there were tons of black Norsemen. Seriously? Nick Fury was also made black. 
Spider man was rumored to be Hispanic but was played by a white English actor with the last name Holland so what the fuck? Marisa Tomei who is of Italian descent plays his aunt. Tom Holland has also worked putting the voice to the Studio Ghibli movie Arriety ... aye you don't complain that yer Jap cartoons are white washed cos they are put into English. 

Scarlett Johansson is annoying people by being in the live action version of the cartoon anime Ghost in the Shell. I would watch Scarlett Johansson taking a dump on a hobo so what is the big deal? Didn't she just have all this crap with her movie Lucy? 

Hey I'm still trying to get my head around Black Widow being played by a Jew ... Just Kidding, I love "those" people ... wouldn't lend them money though ... cos I'm tight fisted, why else would you think?   

Romney was almost as ethnic as Obama, nice try.

Even politicians aren't above putting on orange or brown face to get the votes. Do people go on about cultural appropriation before pretending to be Irish for St Patrick's day? Like I said they have their own double standards. I look on in amusement at yon plastic paddies.

We've all read about black actors struggling to get parts, they still go on about it though Denzil, Morgan Freeman, Samuel L Jackson, Angela Bassett, Halle Berry and Will Smith don't seem to have any problems, I doubt they even audition anymore.

Now you get Asian actors voicing this problem. There used to be a lot of white men on TV, but then as attitudes changed you got females and ethnic people and now you even have the gays, things that were mostly unheard of 40 years ago.

In TV the gays would be flaming but it would all be innuendo and no talk about cock sucking at all. The US had the first TV shows with black leads. Things are changing somewhat, probably not as fast as people want it or maybe too fast for some. A black lead in Star Wars the force awakens ... outrageous!
Um no, that lead was a young chick though Harrison Ford got top billing. Like Black Widow the Rey merchandise was almost nonexistent at first.

Anime is full of round eyed white people that are supposed to be Asian anyways so all this white guilt crap can fuck off. Japanese and Korean people are trying to look western with surgery or make up to look like Sailor Moon or some such shite. The whole K-Pop thing is very unhealthy, get stuck into that cos that's way more messed up that what Hollywood does.

Plot twist, Hollywood and TV channels are businesses, you can take a risk on a new comer or you can play it safe and pick an established name. A big name actor who can't act is better than a non-famous actor who can't act but hey, they can kick high so lets hire them.

There was a lack of ethnic actors in Buffy the vampire slayer but with great acting and writing you can forgive it cos it's empowering to weemen and all that.  

Anime has its niche market, making Power Rangers, Transformers or whatever white friendly and western makes it appeal to a wider audience and that is what it's about. There are different markets around the world and what appeals to one might not appeal to another.

If only Bruce and Brandon Lee had lived longer huh. They could have speeded up the diversity for Asians in film. What happens is meant to happen. 

Bigger crowds than Trump

Martin Luther King Jr's death put a halt to the civil rights moment as planned. You can have Jesse Jackson but he isn't no Martin Luther King Jr. As with Bruce Lee a stand in or pale intimation is fucken useless. That person, at that time or it just doesn't work.   

This is why so many reboots and remakes are shite. Trying to recapture the magic of the original or to make America great again is like trying to catch a fart.  

There still has a ways to go for real change but I don't want movie makers fucking up long standing characters in the name of diversity. I am so sick of the 'make Dr Who black or a female' .... how about making it decent again? That show cannot be saved by diversity, it needs good writing.

OMG they made Bond blonde I refuse to watch it

New Bond? ... like I give a fuck. I had hopes they'd make Daniel Craig more like Jason Bourne after seeing the amazing Casino Royale but after 3 shite films packed full of tired cliches they spoiled it.

Politically incorrect jokes can be funny. CK Lewis did a SNL monologue with why did the chicken cross the road? ... because there was a black guy behind it. He went on to explain that it was the chicken who was racist and the black guy was merely on his way home.

Another black guy ended up eating the chicken but that isn't racist to say that, the chicken was the racist. Old Knudsen laughs at Irish jokes so whatever. I'll fight anyone who says the Irish are drunken brawlers ... in fact I'll cut the fuckers with one of my many beer bottles ... potato anyone? 

Some assholes need to lighten up but would anal bleach not be as messed up as trying to make your eyes round?

Why I Believe

In a werld full of lies and spin, doing the right thing is not always clear cut or black and white.  "When I do good, I feel good. When I do bad, I feel bad. That's my religion." - Abraham Lincoln

We often have to listen to our instincts and inner voice. Old Knudsen's moral compass can be prone to prejudices when faced with stupidity. Stoopid Christians oppressing gheys, stoopid Brexiters believing Nigel Farage, Stoopid weemen that won't send me titty pics .... you get the idea.

Oh yeah, daddy likey long time, send more.

Damn you trolling sex doll for being so hot. I would so buy her second hand.

So anyways, I believe in Captain America rather than in Jesus. I've seen more evidence that Captain America exists than Jesus and why would I listen to someone that A) has never tied shoe laces B) never fought in a war and C) is a fucken hippy. Might as well listen to Jeremy Corbyn except Jesus wasn't too into terrorsists but I bet that the Romans had him on a no fly list cos he was a dodgy Middle Eastern dude.

Captain America isn't 2000 years old, he's old but not that bad. Born 4th July 1918 .... aye no made up date like 25 Dec year what? 4 -6 BC according to "experts" trying to match historical events to mythology.   

Born to Sarah and Joseph Rogers, no rubbish about underage virgin births, his Ma put it about Brooklyn quite a bit. His Da was killed in WWI lest we forget but Old Knudsen gave her a shoulder to cry on and a face to sit on.

Rather than vague 'oh he was a carpenter' or 'maybe he was a Rabbi' we know that Rogers attended George Washington High School and then Auburndale Art School. We know this cos his comics told us so.

We even know that Sarah died from TB when Rogers was 18 .... see? we know so much about Captain America, more than we do about Jesus if he was even real. Old Knudsen gave her the clap, she probably got TB off a dirty door handle or something. 

I'm no even getting into how dreamy the Cap is. He believes in truth, justice and the American way but not in a lame DC Superman way, nah, Jesus is totally DC. Jesus with his umbrella that shoots out poison gas .... what is it with crappy DC villains and their gas?

If only we had taken Sodomy avenue.

If I lived in Gotham I'd always wear a gas mask and only go out at night. Well criminals are bound to werk out that Batman doesn't operate during the day and only a corrupt police force is there to stop em. I'd stay away from alleyways though especially if they are named Crime alley.

Cap totally kills people but they are people that deserve it. He sees nothing wrong with killing the enemy in battle but spying and deception is very wrong.

Yeah ok so maybe he has to work on that. Spying and deception is a valuable part of war. To make the Nazis think there were more troops than there were and to not let them see any weak points in the line a company of artists was set up to drive trucks in circles, make recordings of troop activity on loud speakers and paint different logos on vehicles so the enemy would have false reports of where the Yanks where.

 We are loving it here .... not in Ukraine.

The Russians are masters of deception and pride themselves on how easily they fool the west. Until their troops post selfies and leave their locations on, doh!

To get out of a date with a yucky gurl (boys rule!) he sacrificed himself to save us. His last werds were BRB .... lol! Aye he was ahead of his time.

In the 1940's people kept their promises. MacArthur had a really nice lunch at a TGI Fridays in the Philippines and said, "I'll be back"  well he said "I shall return" then fled from the Japs but he did return when it was safer in 1945. Where is Jesus? Fucken hippies, you can't trust em.

I'm sure everyone in their right mind has given up waiting on that long haired loser. How long do you wait for a date that doesn't turn up? Old Knudsen has waited days before the stalking and the texts begin. Where are you? did you forget? I'll forgive you this time and the last 4 times. I don't take hints very well I bet you regret giving me yer number, well actually I got it from yer friend I friended on FaceBook ..... Who is that in the room with you I can only see shadows from out here. Why do you buy so much bread if you just throw half of it out? .... I see you like chocolate and am on yer period, it tastes funny, I'd see a doctor if I were you.

The police ..... seriously???? I'm starting to doubt yer commitment to this relationship, gotta go fast, I'll see you later, when yer sleeping. 

 With his good friend President Obama.

Captain America did return and helped fight off the aliens, Hydra and the Autumn soldier. He also stood up to Tony Stark when he tried to get everyone to register with Windows 10.

In times of doubt Old Knudsen seeks an answer by asking What Would Cap Do? The way I interpret his werd my answer is usually a jar of raw liver, a sex doll or Scarlett Johansson. 

Or a Scarlett Johansson sex doll. I imagined her being more hairy and darker doonstairs. You'd be shocked at the things I imagine. 

I shall be praying to Cap or maybe I'll send him an e-mail. Unlike Jesus I bet that Cap can use e-mail and types well with those strong manly hands.     

 

Cosby The Rape Ninja

I've recently read two articles that accused the public of not listening to the 40 weemen who have made rape allegations against Bill Cosby. I believe that I did listen and have done a previous blog post on this so go fuck yerself the media for not listening to those rape allegations yerself.

Cosby isn't a big hero of mine, nor was Michael Jackson or Jimmy Savile .... hell I didn't even like the DJ John Peel. Some do get lucky and die before the truth is known and never have to face up and pay for what they have done.
They are just human and having a funny TV show or a popular song doesn't make them any better than everyone else. They may have a public side that people believe like say a wise family friendly doctor or a person who tirelessly works for charity. You don't know that person at all.

In 2005 Bill Cosby had been taken to court for sexual abuse, he testified that he got Quaaludes with the intent of giving them to young women he wanted to have sex with, and he admitted giving the sedative to at least one woman and "other people " whatever that means.  The woman he had assaulted was Andrea Constand, a Temple University employee, she had been given her three and a half-pills of Benadryl.

The American Benadryl allergy med can make you drowsy while the British medicine with the same name only wastes yer money. 

Cosby was on he board of trustees on that Philadelphia school which he later resigned from. No more advertisements, fundraising campaigns and commencement speeches .... similar to the good works of Jimmy Savile.

That case was settled out of court and the documents of it have just been released. Still his supporters like Whoopi Goldberg say he is innocent until proven guilty. No, I think he is pretty guilty and we just have to prove it.

Goldberg isn't the only star with her head up her hole.

Colin Firth, Emma Stone, Cate Blanchett, Alex Baldwin, Owen Wilson, Rachel McAdams, Kathy Bates, Anthony Hopkins, Naomi Watts, Colin Farrell, Ewan McGregor , Scarlett Johansson, Hugh Jackman ...... the list goes on with actors who beg and who think what a great honour it is to work with this guy Woody Allen.

Scarlett said about it when Allen's adopted daughter Dylan named her in an open letter about the abuse she suffered said, “I don’t know anything about it, it would be ridiculous for me to make any kind of assumption one way or the other. ”

Since Dylan's adoptive mother is Mia Farrow people then find it easier to belittle and dismiss anything said against Allen.

That is what people do to accusers who rock the boat with inconvenient truth.

 The two have a mutual admiration society thing going on. 

Allen formed a sick obsession with his adopted daughter Dylan whom he would chase down to fondle, the 7 year-old was terrified to be left alone with him. When Mia Farrow and Allen split up Allen had applied for custody but the judge saw through it and Allen hasn't seen his children since 1992.... Except for his adoptive daughter Soon-Yi Previn who they adopted when she was 8 years-old, Allen is now married to her and have two adopted daughters .... he ignores the boys like his son. 

Allen has his supporters just like Cosby and so does Roman Polanski who fled from the US after sodomizing a 13 year-old girl. Yet American and British actors travel to work with him. Says a lot about actors huh.

If Allen, Polanski, Steve Tyler or even Cosby want to work with me they can fuck off. The same with Terrence Howard, I don't werk with wife beaters either.

So no the public does listen and does pay attention, it's the media and the fans that chose to ignore the reality.


    

Ian Paisley Used His Words To Kill

Paisley walking away from the burning wreck known as Northern Ireland.

Sir James Galway the renowned classical flautist originally from Belfast but now lives the life in Switzerland returned to Northern Ireland for a concert and to tells us what our problem is. His werds about Loyalism and the late Rev Ian Paisley seem to have struck a few nerves and issues.  

"How many people do you think he was responsible for killing indirectly by planting the thoughts of violence and no surrender in the heads of people who had no more sense? I'm sure he was (responsible), because he wasn't exactly preaching 'let's all live together', was he?"

"I never admired Paisley, ever, because I think he was on paper a man of God but in reality I don't think he was. I mean, how could you justify setting one side against another?"

 

 He's quite good on the skin flute too.

Was Paisley even a minister of God? He called the Pope the anti-Christ, I'd call him a pedo enabling misogynist (any of them) but I don't think he even knew what an anti-Christ was. It's in the Bible somewhere, maybe ya should have read it ya bigoted cunt knocker. Doing a correspondence course from the open university of Nigeria doesn't make you a minister. Old Knudsen is a life minister because the Interwebs says so ... that shit is real unlike Paisley's dodgy credentials.  

Paisley called for action against everything Catholic, there have been UVF members who credit Paisley with encouraging them on the road to violence. Paisley was also very anti-ghey with the 'Save Ulster from Sodomy' campaign .... then he bent over, sold out and went into government with Sinn Fein. He licked the green shaft and swallowed the potato flavoured gravy.

Galway who was knighted in 2001 also complained about British rule in Northern Ireland and wants Ireland to be one .... Ok now he's talking shite. If Ireland was soo good then why is he living in richville Switerland rather than butt fuck Ireland? 

The Irish don't want us and can't afford us because we do nothing but drain resources. The British don't want us but they are stuck with us. Being a part of the UK is good for us so fuck away back to Switerland or Galway and hand back yer knighthood if Britain has been so bad for you.       

"Wouldn't you say it is immoral for one country to take over another country just because the other country is not so well armed?" he asked. "Wouldn't you think that was immoral? Well, let me put this to you - would you not think that 800 years ago what the British did was immoral and is still immoral?"

800 years ago? Firstly the Normans were invited to Ireland to help the ousted King of Leinster, you don't invite the devil to dinner and cry foul when he eats all the sides. 

The Normans or Anglo-Normans were a warlike people descended from Vikings, of course they are going to take over, it's what they did, they intermarried and built alliances and castles. Get the fuck over it Galway, all the true Irish fled north and over to Scotland because of the numerous other invasions from Gaul .... aye blame the British on everything. 

Blame St Patrick for killing the druids and turning the Celts into sandal wearing pussies. Keeping the heads of yer enemies is tradition for my people but oh no, St Patrick didn't like that .... so unhygienic this is what the Romans did blah blah garlic blah.  

Northern Ireland is no longer the British-occupied part of Ireland as Galway still thinks, it's moved on and passed the point of being occupied to being what it is .... Northern Ireland.

Centuries of people being born here without a southern Irish identity and almost 100 years of British rule, we aren't Ireland and we aren't Britain, we are fucking special window lickers who can't come up with an identity of their own without a riot.    

Paisley did lead to deaths indirectly with his words and his hate filled sermons, he even tried to rewrite history shortly before his death and was called on his bullshit then. I have no respect for him, he got his and fucked us all. Galway is 100% there. 

Northern Ireland can no longer be a part of Ireland, time for some realism here. Just like how Scarlett Johansson is no longer as hot as she was, no it isn't because she had a baby or has gotten older, it's because she has fucked Sean Penn .... there is no coming back from that, now she is just normal hot.  

Try shagging her without thinking, 'Sean Penn was all over this' it's fucking difficult, believe me. 

Northern Ireland has fucked Britain and has its name tattooed on its neck, no one wants us, even the Game of thrones people think Belfast is boring as fuck, you never hear the people on the TV show Vikings complaining about being stuck down south in 'real' Ireland. 

Galway lived here during the Troubles so he can talk about Paisley but he gave up the right to talk about a united Ireland when he took a knighthood and when he moved away, like all those Boston Irish pining for the homeland but they aren't dumb enough to move there.  

Top 'O' the mornin, now fuck aff before I deck ya.

 

 

 

Sexy Mother Funker

In the UK it's Mother's day, otherwise known as Smothering Sunday as today it is totally legal for mothers to smother their ungrateful, demanding offspring.

Old Knudsen thought you'd appreciate seeing some mothers in all their glory as they raise their unborn children by cutting back to two packs a day and getting lots of frolic acid an shit.

Gurl with the wha? tattoo. 

If you get a tattoo and it's yer only tattoo, make sure it's big and stupid looking and can't be missed if naked. 

Christians do not celebrate today as they should be honouring God rather than their mother .... something about false gods or something.  Well if they do celebrate it they'll go to Hell. Hey I didn't write the rules. 

According to Christianity it's ok to find pregnant weemen attractive because they have a child in their belly, sort of a pedophilia by default. 

This woman isn't pregnant, she just gives off that motherly vibe which many men find very sexy. If it wasn't for stupid laws and selfish fathers, 8 out of 10 men would marry their mums.

All men except those attracted to children and farm animals keep a book called the Taboo book. This contains a list of names of weemen who you'd not have sex with because of who they have shagged such as Sandra Bullock for shagging Jesse James,  Charlize Theron for shagging Sean Penn and Jessica Biel for shagging Justin Timberlake. Other men are Robbie Williams, Gerard Butler , Colin Farrell and John Mayer as they are all walking STD's or just creepy.

 

Even though Scarlett Johansson shagged Sean Penn it goes without saying that she is too hot to be ruined , such things need not be explained, they just are.   

It is medical fact that if a pregnant woman shags a bloke with a big penis the baby has a 84% chance of having a heart attack thinking it was under attack by a snake. It's a fear imprinted in our primal DNA.   

Weemen who do not look pregnant while being pregnant are usually called not yer partner and should be treated with scorn. 

A future mother figures out a baby sling.

I'll probably not be on Facebook today as all the 'yer Ma is so special' crap will probably be up. What is she the rest of the year?

Whoop de fucking doo I have a mother, she is so special cos she didn't drown me at birth but she is old now and needs to be in a home.