The Fuhrer And The Babies

Happy birthday to Jew.

I liked the old days in which the Jews were the good guys instead of being Western pawns used to keep the Holy land out of Muslim hands. 

Back in 1934 a young Latvian Jewish couple were having their first baby. It was a time of growing antisemitism with Hitler and his DUP like politics on the rise. The father had been a singer going by the name Lenssen but when his real name of Levinsons was known he was fired from his local opera house. 

To many Germans, finding out yer favourite singer is a Jew would be like some bloke finding out the lass he had just had a blow job from was a dude .....  Some people might not like it.  

The people of Northern Ireland fully support the not wanting of durty impure races mixing with our proud, white and Protestant inbred genes .... Gog forbid we'd have chins, how dumb would we look with chins huh?  Aye we'd be able to close our mouths but the very thought of not being a slack jawed chinless wonder really does disgust me as it does my fellow, er not racist but rather selective breeder. 

We aren't racist or sectarian, we just don't want no Fenians or coloureds round here. KULTURE!

So the young couple gave birth to a gurl, Hessy Levisons and were so proud that they took her to a photographer. 

Later, the woman who cleaned for them told the mother Pauline, that she had seen Hessy's picture on a magazine cover  .....WTF?????

The magazine was a Nazi Magazine full of propaganda and men wearing swastikas, it even had an interview with Hitler on how he spends his perfect Sunday. I wake up and drink a large beer, then I hike up a mountain or into another country and then it's home to the smell of baking from the ovens at one of my holiday camps.     

He sounds just so normal and human. 

 

The mother phoned up the photographer all hysterical that her little Jewish baby in appearing in a Nazi magazine. The photographer told her to calm the fuck doon. Many top photographers were asked by the Nazis for pictures of babies that best portrayed Aryan beauty,  the perfect example of the Aryan race to further Nazi philosophy. 

The photographer who was a man after me own heart, made a wee joke and didn't tell them that Hessy was a Jewish baby .... the perfect Aryan. 

The picture made it to shop fronts and was put onto birthday cards and I'm sure it was rather scary for the young couple. 

When there is a great evil, the last thing you want is it to notice you. These were people who chanted 'When Jewish blood spurts from the knife, things go twice as well' .... a chant no doubt popular in East Belfast.

The Prods of Northern Ireland (and Scotland) have the song with the words,'We're up to our knees in Fenian blood, surrender or you'll die.' ..... and that is why many Nazi war criminals fled to Norn Iron after the war, to be with their own kind.

The young Jewish couple fled Europe for Cuba (aye good move) then when Castro took over and started to kill everyone they fled to New York. 

Hitler loved children, he was all like 'Children are our future' he wanted to unite the world for future generations. 

 

He was insistent that German children have a good solid education which of course meant being taught how to destroy inferior races. Join the Hitler youth and I'll pay for college, ya never know what you'll achieve, maybe become Pope someday. 

In the 30's Old Knudsen was in Germany to promote British/German relations. I had met the Bosh in WWI and so was the perfect candidate for the job.

 

Hitler soon came to confide in me and ask my advice but of course he never took my advice, just like everyone else and then they say, "oh but I didn't think this would happen" Aye General Custer I'm talking to you.

Since I had served during the Boer war I was able to advise him on the proper way to run his death camps, we invented them so the only way to run them is the British way .... did he listen? he didn't even serve tea and biscuits at 11am, what an animal. 

Looking back on it I can totally see that if Hitler had been hugged a bit more there wouldn't have been a WWII. 

I told him, don't invade Russia and don't procrastinate so much. Ach people will only take helpful advice if they only really want help, otherwise it's just attention they crave.