Nelson Is Out Of Time

"Hey God, nice to meet you, have you ever thought about putting your story into words? Well it's your lucky day as I can write not only in English but also in Ulster/Scots ..... yes oh great one that is a made up language but in my time thousands of people in housing estates throughout Northern Ireland speak it .... so they do."

"Let me get started here" ...... ' In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth.  Now the earth was formless and empty, definitely no Fenians and certainly no Pope, only white Protestants for any others would be cursed and God saw that it was good.'

Blah blah blah other stuff
 
'So God created mankind in his own image, with a beard and specky in the image of God he created them. Male and female he created them, and told her to do what the man says as she is inferior.'

"I'm doing well oh greatness, just going to get in a ween of sin and how sex is dirty and must only be done between husband and wife while fully clothed and no pleasure must be gained from such a disgusting act."

I think I'll just drown them and start again.