Golfing Gangstas

After a hate crime in East Belfast in which 3 people were attacked by a group of 15 armed with golf clubs there has been a call to clamp doon on the lack of restrictions in owning golf clubs.

The current law in the UK says that anyone, even under 18's can walk in off the street and purchase a putter or a driver without having to show any identification . No background checks either which means that any criminal or politician can and often do buy whole sets of clubs.

I call on the government to change the law on golf clubs, also the laws on owning hammers as they have often been used in violent crimes too . We need background checks and registration with these dangerous weapons.

Maybe some form for facial branding for golfers, rapists and pedos. In Northern Ireland you can't carry a penknife in yer pocket but a golf club is fine?

We need to put an end to these golfing gangs, what's next angry lawn bowlers?   

Miley Licks Hammer

Shes at it again. Miley Cyrus licks Hammer in an attempt to be outrageous. When Old Knudsen goes into B&Q he can see the dangerous trend shes setting as young gurls are blocking up the hardware section licking the hammers. You just don't know where those hammers have been.  

Wee Steeky a community worker from Rathcoole said, "I was buying a hammer for a punish beating but when I picked it up it was cover in slabbers, for fuck sake now I have gurl cooties."

This has to stop!   ..... Hammer time!

Lets Get Hammered

Larne being the latest town to adopt the hammer as Norn Iron's national weapon. Soon every Northern Ireland home will have one and every beardless child and woman will be taught to use one.

If the bad guys can have hammers then why can't we?