They Were Asking For It

An exhibition celebrating the work of Kylie Minogue has opened in Glasgow, it features 45 customes and 60 photographs of her art.

It also contained those famous gold lamé hotpants until those voices in my head told me to grab them for a good sniff.

I was wondering are any of my readers solicitors? as I've been charged with 'lewd bahviour' which obviously means when someone grabs a pair of hot pants and starts to sniff the crotch and then when security tries to take them you lick them and shove them doon yer trousers, who would have guessed there was a law against that? I'm a first time offender if that helps my case, well first time for gold hot pants I should add. I'm sorry for anyone that wanted to see the hot pants in one piece .

Get Yer Coat You've Pulled.

Pop princess Kylie Minogue has separated from her boyfriend French actor Olivier Martinez .
The separation was mutual and they remain close friends, that means fuck buddies to you.
He may had helped her through her recent time with the cancer and all but the Frenchie wasn't enough for her, no offense to any Frenchies out there but c'mon you fuck with yer face and fight with yer feet, plus the smell of garlic all the time and the constant flies are quite annoying, enjoy smoking in the cafes while the law still lets you because my cheese eating surrender monkey friends yer time is up . (no public smoking allowed)
Kylie was said to have an itch the froggie couldn't scratch, no not athletes foot its an expression for satisfying fornication, it was discovered by a source close to her that she was full of the horn and wanted a real man who could disgust, excite and make her laugh all at the same time oh and he should stink of piss, hmmm I wonder if anyone around here fits that bill.
Dive, spice rack owning guitar player ?..............no.
Rich, on the rebound coffee whore ?..................no.
Old Knudsen, base and vile brabbler ?................could be.

Long John Knudsen number one super guy, Long John Knudsen quicker than the human eye.......it says quick, not premature and what do I care ? at least I cum.

Hes got the style of a movie star and a Blog that just won't stop when the going gets tough he says fuck a lot and might call you a slut, YA!

I'm not going to explain Hong Kong Phooey to yous. I'm just wondering why would a Police station hire a talking dog as a janitor? maybe they ordered a bomb sniffing dog and got a bum sniffing dog by mistake so they put him to work mopping floors and nuzzling crotches, I like getting my crotch nuzzled but you'd have to have no sense of smell to do it, do I know anyone like that?

Dive, spice rack owning gutiar player cum on doon the crotch is right.