A Space Man

Old Knudsen is usually seeing patterns and making connections that you mere mortals aren't and so sometimes the very simple things will stump him.

Why the fuck would a shop paint a father and mother with their child who has their arm raised in a defensive manner?
Oh thats right, this is Northern Ireland and we don't have abortion here and so the wee unwanted fuckers get to grow up and fuck you wee Timmy for taking my best years and youthfulness, hitting you won't change it but it will make me feel a lot better.

So the kids run out to the car park and stand on the 'no hitting yer child' spaces, much like the way that Highlanders can't fight in a church.

Fucking genius!

Then again if I squint my eyes that child looks like a baby stroller, ah fuck it, it's family parking. I would never have guessed with all the people without children parking there.


What do you do if you see a spaceman?      You park man. 
    

Kill Yer Speed Not The Children

All the children go and play on a busy motorway.

A council in Leicester .... England, has come up with an interesting way to slow motorists doon. Old Knudsen is a very careful driver, unless something gets in his way.

 Like children ....

Outside a primary school they have put up concrete bollards that resemble children-ish. Aye that is bound to slow you doon as you go WHAT THE FUCK?

Of course people might just aim for them.

People are bound to hit this one and then suddenly everyone is Trayvon again.... yawn!

People have complained that they'll distract drivers and that their eyes are creepy and someone is bound to draw a penis on them at sometime ..... cos thats what they do here. They should have made the kids texting, like they do in real life.

 

Don't call me creepy, love me....

Like Scarecrows people will adjust to them and then ignore them. Each figure cost the council £350 and is part of an overall road safety initiative costing  £230,000.

Other measures include a  20mph speed limit ..... huh? 10mph would be better but who listens to Old Knudsen? Hes seen a child get hit at a school when the car was doing around 20mph. Do you want to run to yer child lying on the road with her bone sticking out of her leg because car and child were not paying attention?

Use the money to have a cop on hand and that way yer making money and enforcing the law, jobs a good un.

The Toyota Defense

Actual car not shown for legal reasons.

In 2006 Koua Fong Lee if that is indeed his real name was on his way home from church.
In the car was his pregnant wife, his daughter, father, brother and niece and three other people tied onto the roof .
Lee says, his car inexplicably sped up and he slammed into other vehicles and claimed his brakes didn't work. Lee was sentenced to eight years in prison for vehicular manslaughter for the three people that died that day.

Due to the massive recalls of Toyota vehicles and their acceleration problems, Lee's lawyers are asking that the court re-examine the Camry, which is still impounded. The 1996 Camry was not one of those models but they still want to take a look at it.

The brand of kitchen knives known as 'Kitchen devils' have been found to have been sharp enough to cut human flesh as Wolfgang Fuck found out during the dicing of a carrot, those in prison for using these knives for assault and murder want their cases re-opened to prove it was the fault of the cutlery and not them.

In 2005 Boris Slavavich was walking on his way from church to go and volunteer at the old people's home. He got the sudden urge to stop in at his home for a glass of water only to find his wife with another man.
Boris likes to use props to express himself being a Slav and all so he picked up a 6 inch Kitchen devil brand knife to make his point on how disappointed he was at his wife and next door neighbour who still had his garden shears from 3 months ago as his hedges needed trimmed.

Before Boris knew it the knife had stabbed the couple a total of 78 times in what the harsh prosecution called 'overkill' Boris claims he lost control of said knife and now due to the celebrity chief cutting the tip off his finger hopes the murderous knife will be found as the guilty party and not Boris.

Old Knudsen still supports the death penalty so then there would not be any second guessing and justice would be final.

Justice is always final when someone stands/sits in front of a civil judge during a disability hearing who doesn't even look at half of the medical records and calls the half blind person in the wheelchair a lazy liar out to con the system and tells them to get a job as the judge is sure there is an employer out there just ready to bend over backwards for any health issues the person might have.

The disabled person shunned by the law and not allowed to talk in court and un-helped by their young and afraid lawyer must keep appealing until they are believed, maybe the death penalty should be brought into civil hearings as judges are obviously too important to be dealing with such un-sexy cases unlike the cool fast car ones.

Yes there is a message in this post ........ buy Honda.