ISIS Destroy The Tomb Of Jesus

 

Not content with destroying ancient statues and the tombs belonging to Prophets Daniel and Jonah, ISIS/Daesh have also destroyed the tomb of Jesus.

In the year 33 AB (after birth) when Jesus was crucified his body was taken to Mosul to be buried with all the other greats of the Bible. The New Testament says that Jesus was alive and taken up to Heaven but the translation was wrong, instead of esben which means soul it was read as esbin which means body and so it was his soul that was alive after 3 days and taken up to Heaven, leaving his poor broken body behind.

 

The tomb of Jesus  

Of course people didn't actually really see Jesus after he died, they wanted to believe they saw or felt him but seriously ....  so quit taking this whole zombie Jesus rising from the grave so literally.  In Matthew there are mentions of Jesus' siblings and James his brother was known for his Jesus party piece as they looked quite similar so scholars believe this was attributed to some thinking that they saw Jesus.   

Jesus is in the Quran along with Jonah (swallowed by a whale) as mere prophets so Daesh did not think anything of destroying his tomb.

Pat Robertson the American counter-part to the Pope had been warning that this could happen and has been unsuccessfully for years demanding that the body of Jesus be moved to his rightful place of Lexington Virginia which happens to be Robertson's home town.

Robertson demanded yesterday that the anti-Christ Obama be removed from office and that the US should go and bomb someone or something in divine retribution. 47 Republican senators have signed Robertson's petition for this action. At the time of this writing the petition had 48 signatures.

When asked about the offensive against ISIL and what plans it had to defeat them the White house commented, "We and our allies are continuing to bomb key positions in Syria, Yemen and maybe Belgium we are also having a huge display of military might on the border of Ukraine, if you want to know more watch the President on The late late show tonight."  
  

The skull of John the Baptist on display at the British Museum.

There have been rumors that when the British occupied Mosul in 2003 they replaced all the holy bodies with replicas and keep the real thing at the British museum in London as they do with many of the world's priceless antiquities because you just can't trust yon ragheads, this has not been confirmed though.