Billionaire playboy Bruce Wayne has been the latest person to be infected by the Ebola virus in the US. It is thought he was bitten by a bat at his home in Wayne Manor. Mr Wayne has a large collection of bats for some reason.
"I wanted to be a symbol so I can be incorruptible, everlasting, now blood is coming out of my wiener and every time I fart it leaves a red stain on my Calvin Kleins."
The good news for Mr Wayne is that he's white and so will probably live. They only give the good stuff to the white people.
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