Saturday, 27 December 2008

Scotland Where The Weemen Are Smokin


Great news people even with the world wide recession that has caused many a depression the number of young people smoking in Scotland has returned to the fantastic levels not seen for the last 10 years.

In fact nearly a third of people between 16-24 are smokers. I am excited about this, when the world falls apart you can always count on Scotland.

The government says more needs to be done to start the smokers at an early age and are looking to Glasgow Airport hero John Smeaton to lead the smoking campaign.

John Smeaton holding up his medal for smoke breaks in the face of terrorism.

John Smeaton gained world fame when he kicked a suicide car bomber in the knackers while on a smoke break during the attack on Glasgow airport.

In the 16-19 age group, young women generally have higher smoking rates than young men. In the 20-24 age group, male rates exceed female rates. Yes the race is on.

A study in America sponsored by Marlboro has found that smoking makes you look cool and more mature. The second hand smoke from smoldering terrorists is twice more likely to give you lung cancer than tobacco.



Public Health Minister Shona Robison said: "We are committed to doing all we can to increasing smoking rates in Scotland - both by encouraging more smokers to start and encouraging young people to see it as part of our national identity."

In Old Knudsen's own special opinion if you kiss a woman and she doesn't taste like an old ash tray then she isn't worth a second shag. Ach I do miss the Killamory weemen, their facial hair tickled my balls in only the way a mannish Scottish woman could.

Gog bless you Smeato for you are the new Braveheart ................. smoking with asthma takes courage, you try it if yer man enough.

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5 comments:

tony said...

Oh Lord! I Feel A Pun Around "Puffs" Coming On..............

The Mistress said...

This gal is really smokin’!

Old Knudsen said...

tony no one puns around Smeato!!!!!!

MJ You go places I don't even know exist no wonder Eartha Kitt got colon cancer.

Romeo Morningwood said...

It appears that Smeato has a wee boner from being so close to the HRH?
Plus the price tags are still on his socks.

Anonymous said...

He's Scottish, so it's only natural for him to have a bulge in the trousers. And these are no price tags but floideldoidels, a highly revered peace of Scottish man's clothing.