Saturday, 18 July 2015

Courage And Cooking Oil

Oh whatever, Noah Galloway just lost his limbs in Iraq to get attention. 

Many say Caitlyn Jenner should not have received the Arthur Ashe Award for Courage. We say to those people, "yer just a transgenderphobe!" and we shout them doon and shame them on Twitter. Even the thought of a surgeon going near my cock with a knife is enough to give me the sweats, I'm just not brave enough. Let me fight Daesh or even yon UFC *fighter from the UK* Conor McGregor but don't slice me knob.  

Lauren Hill even died from brain cancer to try to get the award, some people have no shame.
Philip Seymour Hoffman died to make more money in movies, that fella seems to have a new one out every month, that I don't want to watch.  His giant head gives me the creeps.

Totally doesn't look like a dude made up like a lady.  

It takes courage for a man to decide to become a woman these days, especially in the uber misogynistic right wing conservative world of Southern Callyfornia.  So quick to judge there.

Fighting cancer, competing in endurance sports with multiple amputations .... a fucking doddle compared to picking the right outfit in which you don't look like some flat assed old dude on TV, that is challenging. Maybe Kim should share some of her arse cos it looks like Caitlyn lost hers in Vegas. 

If you say white boy ass then yer a racist and a sexist transgenderphobe.

It takes courage to tell yer wife that yer a woman, trapped inside a man's body .... though you still want to fuck weemen, just not her, that my friend is true bravery, especially if you hadn't signed a prenup but I'm sure he she would being a lawyer and all. 

Old Knudsen thinks Jenner can do with her body whatever she wants but does it all have to be in public? He also thinks that Jenner makes Old Knudsen's dick turtle, maybe because I didn't like her as a bloke, why would I like her as a womany bloke? 

Am I being a transgenderphobe because I think she's hideous? Oh c'mon, she could play Gary Busey's twin sister now. Busey could turn woman for his own reality show, I bet Busey would be wild in the sack as a woman. 

I don't think either of these people should have gotten the award for courage. 

It should have went to Romario Dos Santos Alves. This 25 year-old almost lost his arms because he was injecting oil into them to pump them up. 

Never mind the crazy shit about being a woman trapped in a man's body, he is the Hulk trapped in a man's body, this is serious. It takes real courage to do a little bit of exercise and then take the oil injecting short cut. He may have died leaving his wife and young child to fend for themselves but he didn't, cos he had courage an shit. 

Alves should have been given the Excellence in Sports Performance Yearly Award because his 5 minutes a day lifting weights is a lot more current than Jenner's sporting exploits 40 years ago, Alves was fucking robbed. 

Jenner wants to raise awareness and to inspire other transgenders which is very nice and all, talk up the years of therapy you should attend first of before you go cutting anything. Alves inspires others to not think and just inject oil into their bodies and risk solid tumors that could lose yer arm because he believes that inside so many of us is a superhero that needs helps to come out. Being a man or a woman is a piece of piss compared to being a superhero. With great power comes great abs.

You don't become a superhero and play around with yer hair and make up like a teenager, you pose for pictures and save the world from robots and aliens. You have to be all angst ridden and brooding, like a Goth but more sullen like an old lonely clown who hasn't heard laughter for years.

Who hasn't been a man trapped in a woman's body? Such are the perils of sloppy seconds, Life Hack Time! to avoid the suction from all the fluids stick a drinking straw up the side of the vadge to release any trapped air. 

Jenner didn't inspire me to become a creepy looking old lady man but Alves has inspired me to inject some Crisp 'n' dry cooking oil into me guns and maybe into me cock though it totally doesn't need it.     

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