Mom Blames Obama For Making Her Have Sex With High School Jock

Iris Gibney 42, a Victoria's Secret store employee and married "cheer" mom pleaded guilty to having with a 17 year-old High School American football player ..... Did you know they just call it football in the US? They also don't call it the American civil war which is fucking well not on cos American football is a pansy version of rugby and Britain had a civil war long before the Yanks ... just ask a British hipster.

 How Gibney may have looked thanks to angles, filters and photoshap.

Gibney of Pennsylvania met the youth at a football game where she was working with the cheer team which her daughter is on and she started sexting the player. I never like to send pics of me lad to people (I do it anyways) cos I like to see their face of shock and disgust first hand.

"I made a horrible decision. I have been in therapy since it happened."

Aye it's crap when they catch you. Because it was Pennsylvania she got five years probation, 100 hours of community service and must undergo sex, drug and alcohol treatment .... I'll be seeing you in class then lass.    

"Obama has ruined this country with his affordable health care for 32 million uninsured Americans, his growing economy, killing Osama, repealing the don't ask don't tell act and increased support for veterans .... all I know is that I would never have done anything like this under the Bush administration .... thanks Obama."  

We Can Be Heroes

Loads of people getting killed in Pakistan with terrorist bombers and American drones (I didn't know we invaded Pakiland) 95 people die in Brazil floods, an explosion at a West Virginian coal mine kills 25, in the last 2 days 76 people have died by suicide bombs in Iraq and AOL are either going to sell or close Bebo the social networking site. I'm wondering if Obama and Global warming are share the blame for all of this.



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Questionable Questions

I was going to do this deep and intellectual post about the inner city latch-key kids but then I remembered who reads this shit and I can't stand kids so here are some hard hitting questions to tide you over until work finishing and you get to the pub.


1) Is it safe? Is it safe?

2) try to get past the pink shirt, why does David Arquette look like hes shit himself all the time?

3) If those lazy scrounging fuckers in Africa stopped wasting all their money on laundry detergent so their clothes are always clean and colourful would they still be starving?

4) Is this lad yer new hero or what?

5) Is it the herbs and spices or the way its cooked that makes them taste so delicious?

6) I'm too manly for sports but I could watch cheerleaders jumping around all day, am I the only one?

7) Why does bush keep doing this?

8) Who was that masked man?

9) This lass keeps begging me to shag her, should I give into her to give my head peace?

10) where has the First Minister of Northern Ireland's thumb been?

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The first one with all the correct answers wins a holiday to Zimbabwe. The exchange rate is great right now, something like 300,000 Zimbabwe dollars to 30p or 60 cents.