Elephant In The Room

 

 Vampires love elephant blood.

If you see the author Michael Morpurgo please punch him in the back of the head. His latest book An Elephant in the Garden is set during WWII in Germany and is a house of lies!

Lizzie lives with her family in Dresden and her father is sent to the Russian front to kill Russians an shit. Lizzie's mother, Mutti, to fill the gaps of employment left by the men leaving goes and works at the zoo.

 Can you remember what I did last night cos I was blootered.

An order is sent to have all the animals put doon in case they escaped during a bombing. Mutti gets the elephant she is in charge of Marlene saved and takes her home but when those nasty allies bomb the fuck out of evil Dresden they all take off to the countryside and I'm sure hilarity ensues.

The story is loosely based on the story that a baby elephant Sheila was saved from being put doon at the Belfast zoo like some of the other animals during the war and was walked down the road by zoo keepers to a red-brick house on the Whitewell Road where a woman gave her sanctuary in her back yard for several months until the bombing was over.

Sheila lived until 1966 and died at the zoo, the identity of the woman who looked after her has been lost through time. 

The book was set in Dresden because Belfast couldn't possibly know what it was like during the war. Also we have to feel guilt at bombing Dresden so badly.

Fuck off Morpurgo, if that is indeed yer real name. You must really be very English if you dress like that.  Ghey or just English? Hes married and has children, maybe hes a Timelord.

Fact was that it happened in Belfast .... not Dresden, they would have killed it for not being blonde or starved it to death like the Japs did because their poison didn't work on the elephants. Don't go making the people of Dresden out to be saints, they kept the German war machine going, if we hadn't of bombed them the war would have been even longer. Maybe the Germans like war but we can't be arsed.

If anyone reads this sentimental shite just remember that it was some ol milly in Belfast, not wee imaginary Lizzie or her Ma that looked after the elephant so give credit where it is due.