Friday, 13 July 2012

Bad Luck In Love

                                           A lovestruck Romeo sings the streets a serenade 

Jordan Cotton a 21 year-old embracing life and premature baldness is a believer in love. The lucky lady was the beautiful 17 year-old Olivia Nuttall ... 'Olivia, when we made love you used to cry you said I love you like the stars above, I'll love you till I die.'

What does every young man in love do? ............ no not try to get off with her sister or mother, he got her name tattooed on the back of his neck. Nothing says love like a neck tattoo.

Old Knudsen is classy that way too, he has a whole list of weemen on his neck in fact the list has reached Old Knudsen's arse crack but its still romantic .......... right?

Jordan got it done in what he described as the “fairy tale” stage of their 18-month relationship, its a pity she then dumped him.

'I can't do everything but I'd do anything for you . I can't do anything except be in love with you.'

More like 'So sick of your games, I'll set your truck to flames And watch it blow up, blow up.'

Broken hearted Jordan had to do something about his tat as he now felt like a right tit. Thats what he gets for being way too excited about getting his hole from someone who is only legal with parental consent .......... yeah right like a playa like him asks. 


                                             Where are the rest of the names going to go?

Two weeks after the split Olivia saw the altered tattoo and an altercation ensued. Jordan stabbed Olivia 34 times in the chest and face in the middle of a crowded fast food restaurant.

Nah only kidding, during the row he smashed her Blackberry  against a wall and was ordered by a court to pay £150 compensation.

Olivia does have his name on her arm and is thinking of getting 'tiny penis premature ejaculation happens!' below it.

While Jordan regretted the first tattoo, he has said hes pleased with the alteration. Ah young love.

Old Knudsen gives it a year until they are back sucking faces. Do those two need to be breeding?