Muslims, Thousands Of Em

No one really believed I was going away, the only offers I ever get are drunken pity fucks (MJ yer the best;)) I was going to stop blogging for a couple of weeks just to continue the joke and make you all believe it and stop reading and take yer links doon etc but then I thought "Oh look something shiny" and did a post.

Look at the above picture in detail and tell me if you see anything odd, no? me neither. Why would you do that to yerself ? I know why I'd do it to others but yerself ? I thought I was full of self- loathing but they win. Probably American, they cut bits off their willys cos some one told them it was more hygienic, Yanks will believe anything.

Now onto yer regular scheduled post.

Remember when Pope John Paul II forgave Father Gollum for coveting Frodos ring? Today is the date old JP died in 2005.

Now don't get me wrong with this post, I have nothing against Muslims, Catholics, Jews or Buddhists well maybe not Jews as they do start all the wars and did kill Jesus those foreskin-less curly boys.

I don't care what crazy stupid made-up religion yer in, if you think its worth burning in the pits of Hell for then enjoy the damnation, I'll be upstairs with my Free Presbyterian brethren having a glass of God's milky love.

Monsignor Vittorio Formenti said in the Vatican newspaper L'Osservatore Romano, which is latin for 'look Gypsies' that there are more Muslims in the world than Roman Catholics.

Maybe the Taigs are taking a page from the book of George Bush who saw terrorist attacks every time he wanted support and funding.

Catholics are a strange people.

While all Christians (if you count Catholics as that) still outnumber the ragheads at 33 % Catholics accounted for 17.4 percent of the world population while Muslims were at 19.2 percent.

Wow 2 percent, how did they cum to this so close and accurate conclusion I wonder?

Sandsavages seem to be breeding like flies and Christians seem to be having a nice cup of tea instead. No wonder the Catholics are so anti-abortion.

So what caught yer eye first?

I think its every Christian woman's duty to stop being so picky and put out for the lads more but that's just my solution, if any of you weemen want to get into Heaven just climb aboard the Old Knudsen love train express cos its fast and never stops until it pulls into the station of stench.

The Vatican have long since had a secret agenda and Nostradamus said that's where the anti-Christ would arise from talking about the great lie and the festering scab that is the Vatican so don't believe me just look at all the other stuff he predicted that was true, Waterworld and Ishtar being flops, Anna Nicole dying of a drug overdose, the second Spiderman film being better than the first and the Spice gurls reuniting but then breaking up again.

Hitler was a non-smoking vegetarian into Catholicism all the warning signs were there. I wonder what Hitler prayed for.

I smell a 30 year crusade in the air and maybe people wising up to a church run by Nazis and pedos (will await legal letter to be sent to Google) oh and you atheists, don't you sit there and be all smug, yer still going to burn.

How can you not believe in God but then have to make up a name that says you don't believe in God? if God is so important to you that you have to use him to label yerself you might as well say you believe in him. Not so smug now huh?

Ach I'm done with intolerant religious bigotry I think I've shamed them enough.

I am still the way, fuck this halo gives me a headache.

So anyway when judgement day cums and yer begging for yer souls by saying things like, " but I have a blog" don't use my name to try to get in. Its a long story by God holds a grudge longer than any Scotsman I know.

I was one of the angels sent doon to destroy Sodom and Gomorrah, now Archie took out Sodom with his nuke no probs but I was too busy with lot's daughters I misplaced mine somewhere and Gomorrah wasn't destroyed which is why you hear people being called sodomites and not Gomorrahites.

Gomorrah turned into a nice wee resort town famous for its fudge packing factory, if you go on a tour they let you pack some fudge yerself . Try it, you might like it.

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If yer Blog Has Blood In It Then Its Time To Delete

I don't have too much to say on this blog today except this. Don't let Gollum use yer bog. He just moved in next door with his gurlfriend Shirley but wants to keep his turds to himself as he likes to mold them into different shapes and paint them. The bloke is an artist and sells them doon at the market. He says hes got a bit of a creative block right now but you wouldn't think it if you looked at the toilet after he'd been, it looks like something Jackson Pollock would do, more like creative pebble-dashing.

We got into a big argument the other day when he accused me of stealing one of his turds, it seems him and Shirley get into it all the time. The lad isn't all there if you ask me. He cums up to me and says, " Its Gollum's ring, no ring for Old Knudsen" I say um ok then right you are, don't ask don't tell I mean queers can do what ever they want as long as I don't have to watch and I don't get splashed that's what I think. Not really fair on Shirley with him on the doon-low shes looking after his 12 babies and thinks that dressing up is putting on a t-shirt with only one or two stains on it.

Oops I can hear violent splashing coming from the bathroom, it doesn't look like he'll be making any figurines or turd jewelry today. I do wish he'd learn how to do a courtesy flush.

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They All Float Doon Here.

And a tube of KY please.

It wasn't Gollum, he was off fingering the nasty Obbits ring he was, then he spammed Old Knudsen so he did.

Police are looking for a man in connection with a drowning off the Country Antrim coast . The man is about 5ft 9ins tall, slim to medium build, short dark hair at the sides which is longer on the top, hes in his late teens to early 20's with bad skin and yellowish teeth , so ladies if you happen to check this hunk of lovin out call the peelers they want to talk to him.

The man wore a scuffy black coat and spoke with a Belfast accent.

Old Knudsen being one to help the police put the mans description parameters into my search engine database to see if I could get a better idea of what this person of interest looks like

The usual suspects

Why is he dressed like a tramp and why is he running? a criminal if I've ever saw one.

Or he may look like this (according to my search results) keep yer eyes peeled people he looks dangerous.