Monday, 11 August 2008

Go Shaft Yerself


Issac Hayes, 65, who wrote the Shaft film soundtrack in the 70's died after being found by his fourth wife Adjowa and young son Nana Kwadjo unconscious beside a running treadmill at his home.

The running treadmill is being hunted doon by police as running from a dead body is an international sign of guilt, except when my old mucker Billy one ear ran when his wife died as who the fuck was going to believe she kept a toaster beside her bath for a few rounds of toast while she soaked?


The singing star had 12 children, 14 grandchildren and three great-grandchildren and no doubt plenty of bastard children as he just looks the type.

That Shaft film was a load of old bollocks, a black James Bond with fried chicken and none of the class, the name itself implies that black men have big cocks when we all know its the Scottish that are well hung south of the border and I don't mean by the dirty Sassenachs.

I liked him as Chef in South Park, that song 'Chocolate salty balls' is one I love to sing in the golden shower.

Southpark slagged off everything, like me nothing is sacred because if anything is out of bounds then it gets a power it shouldn't have. If you can make a joke about 9/11 or children and puppies with cancer then do so just make sure its funny.

I get people who will laugh when I make fun of blacks, slavs, liberals or gheys but if you make a joke about something they hold dear or defend such topics then they get all offended, people do have their boundaries they should just understand like Southpark I don't give a fuck............... saying that if you ever bad mouth the Queen I will hunt you doon and kill everyone you hold dear and then you. I bad mouthed the Queen once but then I used this new tongue technique and she loved it, to quote, " Oh my Sir Knudsen we are arriving."


Hayes was a hypocrite and quit the show after an episode which ridiculed Scientology, claiming his religious beliefs should be 'respected and honoured' unlike all the other religions he gladly mocked.

He said: "There is a place in this world for satire, but there is a time when satire ends and intolerance and bigotry towards religious beliefs of others begins."

That message was beamed into his head by his alien overlords, yep the same ones who helped Hitler kill millions of big nosed money lenders.

Rest in peace Mr Hayes in yer creepy Scientology heaven, are you still a Scientologist when you stop paying yer membership fees and are no longer of any use to them? I don't know it all sounds a bit Fenian to me.




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9 comments:

The Mistress said...

I am taking this opportunity to say you should show more respect toward Canadians.

Barlinnie said...

I have the same respect for Canadians as I do for the prod's.

Both make one hell of a comfy footstool for my size 14's.

The Mistress said...

*kicks size 14s away and plonks dainty high-heeled boots onto Fenian footstool*

The Mistress said...

Dang. Wrong nationality. Bollix is a Scot.

*plonks dainty high-heeled boots onto Scottish settee*

Old Knudsen said...

MM I wouldn't risk my life for anyone unless they were hot.

never mind you know what they say about guys with big feet? can't fight for fuck.

MJ he says hes from Glasgow and a Celtic lover so Fenian is correct enough they still worship Satan and the pope and think incest is fine.

Matt did I ever mention about my massive manhood?

Barlinnie said...

MJ, if you're gonnae put your feet on my settee then at least wash your feet first.

Numb-Knuds, The only God that this big hoofed fenian worships is the handsome looking bastid in my mirror.
Incest is fine as long as you keep it in the family & only use holy water as a lubricant.

Unknown said...

Not only do YOU have no boundaries (which I respect, by the way) neither do your readers. cool.

Anonymous said...

You are all perverted.

Bunny said...

Shut yo mouth!