Saturday, 23 April 2016

Stalking Your Ex

So you get a few drinks in you and want to know what yer ex is up to. They are bound to be unhappy and have probably never found anyone as good as you and who doesn't like to gloat? The restraining order and yer drone with the camera being hit by a bus prevents you from spying so you do a search of the Interwebs.

I am quite tech savvy for a silver surfer, I know that a server isn't just some snooty person that pretends not to see you when you need a top up. A dongle isn't a euphemism for a penis and if yer having cyber sex first check that you are USB compatible ... fuck that hurt.  

I think I'd remember her.

So I entered my various exes info into the computer .... database but there must have been a glitch in the matrix. Sorry if I'm confusing you with all this tech jargon, ya have ta keep up to date or you'll look like an idiot.
I even opened up my lap top at the back to see if the box of Internet was properly in. 

When you type in 'thick women' you do not get Old Knudsen's exes. Not even when you type, 'misguided junky hoors that needed the money' I suppose it would have been easier if I had remembered or had written down their names. I know there was a Cher but she didn't give me her last name.

I'm gonna send yon Mr Google an electronic mail to get him to sort it out or I'll switch to Yahoo in protest.  

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