Saturday 10 February 2018

Old Knudsen's Shame


Old Knudsen has not been online to much recently, that's why it's a much happier place to be. Old Knudsen isn't one of those fake Interweb people that just go around making rude comments ... no, he's a real person that goes around making rude comments you ugly fuckers.

2018 has been difficult. I eventually had to go into rehab for Tide Pod addiction. I was looking at my gunties and they were skid mark free. Plus the ladies loved the fresh detergent scent every time I farted but like all addictions there is a down side, even if yer living the clean life like wot I was.

Then I started to add a little fabric softener and before you know it I'm standing in Tecso going into Tesco rage cos they are out of stock Comfort and Shout the stain  remover makes me racist so I can't be having any of that. If only the Jews ran Tesco, they wouldn't run out.


The peace of rehab was interrupted by calls from the President of the US. That guy is so insecure.  I had just finished a job sending the Cubans a message with Fidel Castro Diaz-Balart committing suicide by shooting himself twice in the head but now he's still on about this Russian crap.

"Knudsen they are getting closer, can you not kill Mueller?"  .... Mueller is a tough SOB, I traded blows with him in 97, I just rub Republicans up the wrong way.  I told him I'd think about it.  Then what followed was a 35 minutes rant about how everyone hates him. Luckily Old Knudsen was on his commode.

I said Donny, do what makes you happy. Life is short. You want a parade you have one .... even though Americans can't march for shit, no snap to it. Play golf, make shit up it's all good.

The tax reform was a great hit all I hear is people saying how happy they are that the old tax system has been reformed. As for the stock market, I'm sure Hillary had a hand in that.

No one wants to hear about the Russians and the secret deals the current admin have been doing, the people want to know about Hillary's e-mails. How come she deleted those e-mails and didn't die because she didn't pass them on? That's the real story. 

Melania may be angry after the world found out about Stormy Daniels but she had just given birth and you aren't supposed to have sex for a while until they heal ... you were just being considerate. 

Sticking up for domestic violence abusers, well everyone has their good and bad points, perhaps they were asking for it, why should we judge? It's not very Christian to judge.

Ya know you think you have it bad until you hear about how the media is out to get you like they did with Jesus. So Old Knudsen is trying to recover and keep the world together too.    I just hope May doesn't phone me about Brexit, that's like trying to pick up a turd by its clean end.


1 comment:

k said...

I thought maybe you had gone deep undercover and would reemerge after helping Angela get a coalition formed. I ask no questions. I live in hope.