Tuesday, 18 July 2017

Time for a Timelady

Space clothes go in the space hamper not on the space and time floor!

The BBC who still make sets out of cardboard and still do the crappy camera angles from the 70's have shown the world they could be modern by making the new Doctor Who a woman.

Not at all a novelty jump on the bandwagon success of Wonder Woman and a failed Presidential bid (when will the UK have a female PM?) it is about empowering women.

That thing Joss Whedon did 20 years ago that the world wasn't ready for. Oh and Old Knudsen loved Buffy so away an fuck if you think he's got a problem with female leads, he has a problem with a female Doctor Who. Next up a female James Bond.

These things got popular in the first place because ... oh fuck it.

You can't empower weemen, they like cock and cleaning up after men too much ... FACT!

Of course it was going to be some Brit that Old Knudsen hasn't heard of, he doesn't watch much crap British TV due to most of them lacking the quality that most US shows have. You can say more with one lingering camera shot than a page of bleh filler dialogue.

Old Knudsen does like Black Mirror, it's well made and intelligent like a modern Twilight zone. Jodie Whittaker was the cheating wife in the excellent episode The Entire History of You. That's the one Robert Downey jr wants to turn into a movie.

Of course I only found out she had been in something I had watched after Googling her thanks to Doctor Who. Broadchurch you ask me about? ... I say Yawnchurch. Just a load of other shows rehashed and re-booted into one.  

Doctor Who was originally supposed to be a children's show that would teach kids science and history. When companion Peri's outfits got shorter and tighter with boob bounce during running and obvious nipples poking through it started to look more like a low rent Baywatch.

Old Knudsen misses Peri.

Now it's a show for older virgins. To make up for the lack of sense, Steven Moffat made everyone speak fast like Sherlock. Luckily Moffat is going as he's really been half arsing the 50 projects he has on the go at once.

There was this episode with a Victorian army unit on Mars .... Sort of steampunk without the cool. One of the soldiers was black. Now Old Knudsen isn't racist ... much, but he does get annoyed when people take liberties with facts and make glaring mistakes.

A Victorian army unit would not have a black guy that they treated as an equal anymore than they would speak to a female Time Lord. Have you never watched Zulu?

The BBC tries for diversity after decades of being white and male but seriously bad casting just ruins everything.

The new Time Lady (isn't a Lord) will have a handbag that is bigger on the inside cos women pack those things with everything. There may be jelly babies but there'll definitely be tampons and pads ... it would be sexist to ignore that right?

Lets hope she has a bit more sense and packs a handgun. Less people would die per episode if the Doctor just wasted the villain.

Martha Jones who was a medical doctor had to pretend to be a servant in the early 1900's. 

Sarah Jane had a sonic lip stick, maybe number 13 will have a sonic vibrator or can opener so she can make the space and time dinner.

She'll need a male chaperone to play as her husband or most of Earth's history will be closed off to her. Hey I don't make the rules. I'm sure she'll raise her voice once and after that everyone will consider her an equal like they do with the current one.  

Or they'll declare her insane and lock her up like they did will uppity women back in the day.

Will they cover this or gloss over it? The modern day Doctor seems to be a figure of redemption trying not to turn to the darkside. It's the human companions that keep him grounded. Lets see them keep her grounded when she's on her space & time period. The TARDIS will tell her it only likes dudes so change again or get out.  

Now as a female there is the chance of a space and time baby ... I smell spin off! They should have had a spin off with the Doctor's daughter but the BBC tend to miss massive clues and only go for whatever everyone else is doing.

Dr Who hasn't been good for the last few years. I've watched it when bored but haven't enjoyed it. Who the fuck wants a Clara or Pearl action figure? Most bad guys are as scary as the ones on Scooby Doo for fucks sake.

I'll watch it with its overdue and calculated move but if it doesn't up the game with the writing I will drift away.

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