Tuesday, 25 April 2017

Jeremy Corbyn The Next Prime Minister

Nothing Jeremy Corbyn likes better than to ride his bike on the open roads

You may have heard that there is going to be a General Election in Britain in June. Cos we aren't sick of voting and fucking things up eh? The last election had voters for the opposition party (Labour) doing a protest vote or not voting because they thought the then Labour leader Edward Miliband was weak. 

Yeah that showed them, voting Green or not voting gave the election to the Tories, well done you smart fucking arseholes. 

Labour scrambled to change and got Jeremy Corbyn as the new leader. 

 Making socks and sandals cool

Old Knudsen's take on him is that he's an idealist, a dreamer with his ideas not based on reality. He is anti-establishment, Trump and Farage were also called that but they weren't really. Corbyn has been compared to Bernie Sanders and yes if Sanders was less intelligent and less lovable they would be very similar.

He always looks like he's about to say "get off my lawn"

In his early days Corbyn was a vice-chairman for CND, if you remember the 80's you'd remember all those CND hippies at Greenham Common protesting the American Cruise Missiles there. Corbyn would like to the UK to get rid of all its nukes and the obsolete Trident submarine program. If we play dead, don't back up our allies then Russia will never attack us .... he wants out of NATO too. 

Old Knudsen thinks it's ok to have some nukes as a deterrent but not to go nuts like the US. Corbyn has also said he'd like us not to need an army ... why say stupid things like that? I'd like pedos and rapists to stop doing their thing but that ain't gonna happen. We will always need an army, navy and air force cos people are cunts. 

      On his real bike that he's named ... The Destroyer! no not really probably Derek or Mable

He says he isn't a pacifist ... yeah right but voted against the Iraq war and against Syrian airstrikes. It would be good if he could accept how things are and adapt. He thinks he can reason with ISIS and achieve a political peace for fucks sake. Cos religious fanatics are always so easy to reason with
Bill Nye the science guy with Creationist and evolution denier Ken Ham

He is against austerity and would like to all those services that were sold off to be returned to the public. He also wants dentists to work for the NHS rather than private firms. 

He fought off two rebellions in his own party. Many in the Labour Party don't agree with him and have tried to oust him. Some of his leftist ideas were too leftist even for socialist Labour.

He has told other politicians to wise up when they attacked him for his scruffy appearance and has refused to sing God save the Queen. He a vegetarian who is more spiritual than religious ... oh so many red flags. 

He's sympathized with terrorists when it wasn't trendy to and all that is scary and shows a lack of judgement especially 5 days after a bombing they just carried out. 

 As like Sanders he has walked the walk

Lets hope that June be the end of May ... Theresa May but if she had thought she would lose she wouldn't have called an election.

The Labour Party is squabbling and keep resigning. Corbyn is weak, vague and seems like he's not fully on board with things. To woo the voter they announced that there should be 4 extra Bank Holidays than there are ... what? Not really a game changer since the Tories have promised free Big Macs money off yer next shop at Tesco. 

Already the fuckwits that voted Green the last time are looking towards the Lib Dems ... so much fail. 

Old Knudsen personally doesn't like Corbyn but he also doesn't like May and the Tories are rightly fucking up this cuntry. Anyone else in the campaign doesn't matter and you are only fooling yourself with other parties. 

Corbyn needs to pull his lazy hippy finger out. A charm offensive. He needs to support the armed forces and police. He needs to talk tough about things and not just what the Tories are up to and he needs cool soundbites that will be repeated. He needs to show the NHS that he has their back. He needs to go to those things that Brits hold dear and show that he loves them too. 

At the moment he's too distant and bleh. He needs photo ops showing him having fun. Yeah reading to kids and breaking some eggs ... very nice and tame, he needs to show he can break heads too. 

 Not the manhole cover you were looking for

May went hiking, he needs to go abseiling .... with mountain rescue or something. The man takes pictures of man hole covers for fucks sake he needs an image make over or you might as well not bother with the election. He's coming up to his 68th birthday 4 days after Old Knudsen's, he needs to show the werld he isn't fucken dead yet. 

He is famous for not spending money but get him to splash out on something nerdy, perhaps he can pretend to like Star Wars or something, he needs to look human and be seen having fun. 

 He can smile

Old Knudsen was wrong about Trump winning and he had hoped his fellow Brit would vote to remain in the EU and to not be bigoted cunts so on my losing streak I'm predicting a Tory win because Labour, nay Corbyn cannot promote himself and there is more to slag the old fart off over than there is to like him for. 

In June vote Labour, because it isn't Conservative and for fucks sake don't throw yer vote away by being clever or tactical.     

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