Friday, 25 March 2016

A Post Not About Donald Trump

Some "experts" say that what I do to my readers is akin to psychological abuse, Old Knudsen doesn't know about none of that but what he does know is that yer worthless and you'll never find a blog that treats you as well and this blog does so just fucken read or you'll feel the back of my hand ... and maybe also feel yon strange hairy mole on me back, nope it just fell off, I knew it wasn't a good idea to eat chocolate covered raisins in bed but it was an impacted poop emergency issue. Years ago I was cursed by 3 witches and have not had a decent dump since then, value and appreciate yer regularity and don't piss off any witches.    

Isn't everything about Donald J Trump? Hillary who switches sides more times than a Scottish clan has seen how popular he is and has even endorsed him as he did her with his funding years previously. Here are some of his quotes that have made him so loved amongst Americans who are itching to vote him into the White House.

The only people with any kind of job security these days are Arms dealers, Economists, Climate Change Scientists and Politicians. You go into politics to get your slice before they catch high on coke fucking a young boy or some other dodgy political past time.  

Can you blame them? Never mind Donald Trump, more like Donald Hunk though the unconsciously bit sounds a little Bill Cosby, this isn't the 80's for fuck sake.

Did this source end the conversation by talking about how jet fuel can't melt steel beams, planes pumping out chemtrails, burning snow and how marijuana can cure cancer?  Turns out that it was a fake certificate and it says 'Anti-Christ' and 'born in Kenya, mother a Jackal' but since he was almost finished his second term they just let him continue as the paper work alone would cost a couple of hundred dollars. 


I have no problem with doing away with winter, bring it on. My penis and balls crawl way up into my body and hibernate all winter, I have have often been mistaken for a woman ... no, there isn't an embarrassing locker room story there.... I didn't find it a bit embarrassing at all. 

What father hasn't thought about dating his own daughter? .... what do ya mean most of them?

It's so very true, I can't even ride a bus that has weemen on it without at least one sexual assault .... it's crazy, but they keep doing it to me. 

Donald only drinks full fat Coke cos he isn't fooling anyone. he puts the eat into 'Make America Great Again.'

To finish what he was saying, "and it would make me so hard ... the kind of hard I get from looking at my daughters when they shower and I'd hate fuck Rosie and spit in her face."

Wow, luckily he only mumbled that part or people might think he was a sick and twisted, incestuous, misogynistic, rapist cunt.

I for one would not like to match wits with professor Trump, he is soo right when he says we need to get smart, if only I had graduated Kindergarten as I do feel intimidated by his cunning intellect. He also has all the best werds.

I think it might have been Jesus that said, "greed is good" so yet again he tells it like it is. I don't know what Trump's policies are but he speaks his mind and people cheer so I'm good with that.

And if you don't sign a prenuptial agreement then yer a gold digger .... I'm sure weemen would only want to be with Trump for his sex appeal and amazing personality rather than his money.

Mexicans: "They’re bringing  drugs, they’re bringing  crime, they’re rapists."

Planned Parenthood: "It is like an abortion factory, which is terrible." 

Carly Fiorina: "Look at that face! Would anyone vote for that? Can you imagine that, the face of our next president?"

 Well ok he may have a point there.

George W Bush: "Say what you want, the World Trade Centre came down during his time."

Ben Carson: "You don’t cure these people. You don’t cure a child molester... Pathological, there’s no cure for that."

Hillary Clinton: "She’s playing the woman card up, that’s all she has. Honestly, outside of the woman card, she’s got nothing going, believe me."

Muslims: "Complete shutdown of Muslims entering the United States until our country’s representatives can figure out what is going on."

Obama: "We have a president who doesn't have a clue. I would say he's incompetent, but I don't want to do that, because it's not nice."

Jobs: " I will be the greatest jobs president that God ever created, I tell you that."

ISIS: "They've become rich. I'm in competition with them. They just built a hotel in Syria, can you believe this? They built a hotel."

Obviously not American jobs as he usually invests overseas and manufactures there too but you can sure salute him for underpaying immigrants to work for him as money makes the werld go around and without Trump the werld would stop and gravity would cease to be.  

He earned this 'I told you so' I mean sure Brussels and other European cities have had several terrorist alerts since last November, who could have foreseen that sometime there would be another terrorist attack? Truly amazing Mr Trump or should be call you Donald Tradamus?

Luckily he didn't say this just hours after the attack or he'd look like a total douchebag.


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