Tuesday, 19 January 2016

Oregon Militia Want Bags Full Of Dicks

Dildos and dildoes are both correct ... yet so very wrong.

Those brave patriots in Oregon who are defending your right to feed your cattle, to mine and cut down trees on public land that are being wasted for things like conserving wildlife are getting bored.

One member was arrested for shopping for snacks using a stolen Federal vehicle and the others are spending their time destroying security cameras at the wildlife sanctuary .... in case "The Man" uses them to spy on what they may be doing to each other etc.

It's difficult to keep discipline in an army when there is no fighting to do so Jon 'purdy mouth' Ritzheimer has stepped up as morale officer. After making a video complaining about people sending them dildoes and a bag of dicks the militia have done a U- turn and now want more plastic cock.

Ritzheimer shows you in his latest video what type the guys all go for. He also thanks Cards Against Humanity creator Max Temkin for the 55 gallon tube of passion lube.

Because of medical conditions some of the militia have he has asked for strap on's and if anyone with money to burn is watching he'd like the AssMaster 3000, the one with the upgraded triple action and the 'pounder' handle, not the easy glide version as that is prone to jamming ..... so he's heard.

So think about those lonely bored men up there fighting for your rights in an ungrateful town that doesn't want them for a cause that just seems like sour grapes and something that suits them but is really for all Americans because who doesn't like to chop down trees? 

Cock haters gonna hate.

The homeless will still be homeless tomorrow but this is something YOU can fix.

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