Monday, 30 November 2015

Charlie Sheen Swallows The Gravy

It turns out that Two and a half men star Charlie Sheen sleeps around with prostitutes, has unprotected sex, does drugs, is a little crazy and lies .... stop the press!

He spent $1.6 million one year on hookers while HIV positive but insists he has never passed on the disease.
After saying how people were trying to shake him down for cash about his condition he came out and admitted he was HIV positive as $10 million was enough to pay to try to keep the diagnosis covered up. He has 3 ex-wives and 5 kids to pay for.
Sheen would never do anything like not tell a partner about a disease ...  well, except for the time he settled out of court for millions to a bloke he gave herpes to.

Now there are videos cumming out of sheen sucking on a crack pipe before he sucks on some other pipe in Vegas .... I'm sure he was quite honest about his health then.

This HIV news isn't a big shocker, in 2011 he also admitted to having tiger's blood which then made some of his former playmates get tested for that too.

Who cares what his sex life entails? Some people say if you knowingly pass on HIV then you should be tried for murder while others say the chances of passing it on are remote and with modern medicine you have a much longer life than you would have 30 years ago.

Just look at Sheen, his teeth have fallen out due to drug use, he has tours when his life is falling apart to show everyone what a mess he is in, you just know he sweats STD's and that his herpes probably has herpes. Is it any surprise he has a festering cock dripping with disease? He probably has a few that Old Knudsen doesn't have and that Errol Flynn would say, "how the fuck did you manage to get that one?" to.  

Anyone that thinks having sex with Sheen is a good idea can't be too bright. I think he's a liar and knew he was infected, the same way as he knew he has herpes, he's a tweaker with mental issues, of course he knew.

Sheen has always lived a self sabotaging life so why would you think that he'd care about someone else's life?  His self loathing gets hidden by his ego and maybe he believes he is something special because he almost had a movie career and did well in TV for a while.

He's 50 and his doctor says with medication his HIV can be managed and it will be safe and he'll have a normal lifespan.
I think it's attempted murder, while HIV has gone from being a killer to being a chronic disease that doesn't mean that bam! you'll get the best medical treatment and respond well to it and will never get AIDs and die 20 years before yer time, people are still dying from it you know.

People go on about Bush and Blair being war criminals but no one ever mentions Sheen's Two and a half men. I think we should hang the festering scab by the neck. Too much? OK then, how about lethal injection but this time leave out the beef.     

Saturday, 28 November 2015

Blackwater Has Not Returned

Former Navy SEAL officer Erik Prince has shown that even though 4 of his men getting 30 years to life for the killing of 14 unarmed civilians in a Baghdad in 2007 and having his company re-branded and him pushed out hasn't hurt his career any.

He's back though not in Iraq. He has put together an 800-member battalion of foreign troops for the U.A.E..

Mercenaries from mostly Columbia paid $1000 a week and life insurance for a 3 month tour in Yemen.

The troops will be used to guard oil pipelines and to quell any anti-Arab uprisings .... in other words they are to fight on the behalf of the U.A.E. against the Iranians who are busy overthrowing the pro US and Saudi government ... and winning.

There will be other foreign troop veterans such as US, UK, German, French and South African. The gulf countries are inexperienced pussies when it comes to war but have the money to wage proxy wars and not technically get involved .... like how they funded ISIS .... Oh did I just say that?

Erik Prince who now is careful about the contracts he signs in case he ends up in court again when his men panic and shoot 14 plebs again likes the codename 'Kingfish' ..... It's ok, codenames are cool, if you combine them with passwords and secret handshakes. 
His new company Reflex Responses is nothing like Blackwater .... honest, and he isn't really in charge at all. He just organizes shit but you won't see his name on things. 

I'm sure they'll do well at being the security for a string of planned nuclear power plants, I feel safe just thinking about it.

Sheik Mohamed bin Zayed al-Nahyan, the crown prince of Abu Dhabi and of Bel air gave the other Prince $21 million as a start up for his private commando unit. To cloud the waters Prince uses other companies like R2 and Paravant  ..... because you just can't say the 'B' word (Blackwater) Thor Global Enterprises also helped with the recruiting of soldiers. He now uses others like US veterans and tries his best to stay in the shadows but we can see him.

The Colombians get the best training.

The battalion based in the U.A.E. costs $9 million a month to run with troops doing constant training in navigation, basic infantry maneuvers and sniper skills all dressed in Emirati military uniforms. A Colombian chef was even provided to make some traditional dishes for the men.   

Some trouble with the quality of recruits had to be addressed as Thor couldn't keep up with the supply demand hence the need for the South African mercenaries.

Reflex Responses or R2 won't hire Muslims because you can't count on them killing other Muslims .... so I see there is some killing expected to happen.

Prince's plan though it's been a struggle to keep it together is to dominate the area militarily but he's no 5 star General. To think, it was only 10 years ago that Prince had 2000 Colombians working security in Iraq, now he's struggling to keep 800.
Old Knudsen can already see the outcome. A load of dead Colombians in the Yemen desert while the smarter US, European and South African troops get out before shit fully clogs that fan. Prince wants to poke at Iran but he isn't in their league.     


Friday, 27 November 2015

To Those About To Shop We Salute You

The Purge: Black Friday.

The UK has been becoming more and more like the US over the past few years .... well what they think the US is like going by such shows like Jersey Shore. We even have our own shows just like that full of young douche bags with fake tans and low cut tops that reveals cleavage ....  and that's on the blokes.

 From the land of the free and the home of the brave. 

We can so out-douche bag those Yanks.

Brits are rude, pushy, self-entitled, fat diabetic American wannabes. Binge drinking and random street violence is the only British trait we have left. 
The Brits have committed genocide on so many people in their time that it's hard to pin down just one example in order to have a Thanksgiving. We do have the 5th November when we use sympathetic magic by burning effigies of some Catholic terrorists who tried to blow up parliament, that's nice and bloodthirsty and in Ireland we celebrated the widespread slaughter of the Pagans/snakes by St Patrick and his holy henchmen. 

No heartwarming tales of Boer war concentration camps or the cheerful slaughtering of Africans or Aborigines. British PR spin is kinda shite.

We just skipped the feed up and now have the sales on Black Friday .... I believe in the US they call it a Friday of color but we're barely out of the 1980's mindset over here. 

Tesco is opening its doors at 5am .... aye even the 24 hour ones. Nah I don't understand that either. Tesco don't do sales very well, if there are items on sale for cheap there will be about 10 of them and the staff get first pick and the rest of the people will be faced with the usual pretend bargains that they have. I don't shop at Tesco unless I don't have a choice, their restrooms are always covered with shit and piss and the soap dispensers and hand dryers never werk ..... after I'm done that is.    

 A fine US tradition.

Still, Tesco is one of the few places you can still shop lift from. If the door buzzer goes the security guard rolls his eyes and turns it off. 

Other stores have their sales too, I've not seen any great bargains but if it gets you into their store with money in yer pocket then they win. Most people just go for the Black Friday shopping violence anyways.  

 Buy one get one for slightly less on the TV's at Tesco. 

Last year 3 people were arrested for assault at various Tescos throughout England, in an Asda supermarket youths tried to take a TV off a woman and in a supermarket in London the shoppers were called "animals."

The police were so not ready for the crowds last year but this year we'll be expecting full riot gear. Fuck ISIS, this shit is dangerous.  


Thursday, 26 November 2015

Happy Trumpsgiving!

Before you get stuck into that turkey let me remind you what you have to be grateful for .... yes for Donald Trump ... me! I shall make America great again like the time we had most of the known world in our empire and when we ruled the waves until the moderate rebels destroyed our Death Star.

Shut up Johnny I'm completely sober, you know what else was a sober .... sight? Seeing those twin towers come down on 9/11.
I was in my apartment at the Trump tower 4 miles away and as I dangled upside down from my sex swing I could see people jumping to their deaths as the planes struck.
I rubbed off the oil and put of some clothes and went to help. It was difficult getting in and out of the buildings to save people as angry Arabs cheering and celebrating filled the streets all shouting, "Death to America" you probably saw them on the news reports.
I had to fight off some illegal Hispanics who were trying to rape a hard working American woman, something's up with that am I right?

As the buildings came down the Arabs all cheered, I wasn't very happy. Then something came floating down from above. It was Muslim passport with a refugee stamp in it from one of the terrorists and the stamp was signed by Obama, even back then he was working to destroy America.

9/11 would never have happened if we had built walls at our borders, unless Obama gave his Muslim friends some advanced ladder technology like he gave the Iranians nukes. 

Shout up Denise I'm talking here! If you look at Obama's real birth certificate you'll see the 'B' in Obama looks like an 'S' and that his middle name is after his god father, a man you may know as Saddam Hussein. Barack is Kenyan for 'son of ' so you work it out for yourselves but I didn't vote for him. Obama is horrible, the turkey is dry and Hilary is weak at making sandwiches and on immigration.

Fuck you Rob I do care about the homeless veterans, I told one in the street to 'get a job' then I charged him $500 for that bit of financial advice.

I saw over on Ellis island a family of Syrian refugees, the parents were strapping explosive vests to their children and telling them to go into churches ..... then they changed their minds because no one actually goes to church in this great Christian nation of ours so instead go into Macy's on Black Friday, that can't be good.

Now Donald, that's a good Thanksgiving rant but it went a little racist with the whole Black Friday thing. We should be grateful that I am the greatest rock 'n' roll star ever! You might be Donald Trump but you ain't Kanye West bitch! That turkey reminds me of my beautiful Kim, my next baby is gonna be named South so he/she can get a sponsorship deal with Southwest airlines.

Cherokee princess Iron Eyes Cody crying because you don't lift up yer trash. 

Thanksgiving is not just about sales and racist rants over turkey, it goes back to the time when white people tricked idiot savages to feel sorry for them and then they used that compassion to take their land and engage on a campaign of genocide against them. 

Let us all be thankful for being white overlords .... it's fucking awesome! Those who aren't, I'm sorry for yer loss.  Lets also be thankful that we have food in our bellies, a roof over our heads and access to alcohol and strong medication, if you don't then you've failed at the game of life, go live in a teepee ya injun hippy. 

Compassion costs nothing and is often long remembered. If you see a homeless person, be they veteran or not, stop for a moment and share a little humanity with them with a kind word, ask them how their Thanksgiving dinner was and what they are doing for Christmas, maybe advise them to wash a little more often as they sometimes forget.     

Obliviously if they are of an ethnic persuasion and yer a cracker don't approach 'those' people for yer own safety. 

Let us all be grateful and ignore those less fortunate than us because it's all about plates of food followed by the traditional bloated self loathing and ignoring the old drunken racist aunt or uncle sitting in the corner. 

Happy Thanksgiving everyone!  .... terms and conditions may apply. 

Wednesday, 25 November 2015

Are Children Less Kind These Days?

These kids are from Florida and were playing animal rescue so it's not really being cruel. 

A State of Kindness Poll done by NBC News says that children are less kind than they were in the past. Obviously this is not scientific as it is asking for opinions based on life experiences and perceptions. The only way to see if children are less kind is to cut open their brains an scan them under the mircophones or something. 

62% of the more than 2,600 participants say that children are wee evil fuckers. It's true that children have changed, in the olden days they would accept the word of someone dressed like a cop who told them there was free candy in the back of their van with the covered windows. Now when an authority figure offers them free candy they ask what the catch is and ask for ID. 

66% of women feel more strongly about this but raising kids is obliviously a female thing like dishes and ironing, it's DNA people, not sexism. The men that were asked kind of shrugged and said "whatever"  or "why are you asking me?"

 77% of them blamed the parents, that's a bit harsh, what about the refugees? Is it a parent's job to teach their kids to be kind? What the fuck does school teach them then? 

The purple dinosaur Barney tells kids to share but when the likes of Charlie Sheen spreads his herpes and HIV then everyone is condemning him .... blame society! If you can't take a hit from a crack pipe and then suck off some bloke in Vegas (while on camera) without condemning him then what the fuck people? 

56% of people without kids thought that you are born with kindness .... what fools, they'll learn. The nature versus nurture from those who have had kids was 50% either way. 

Old Knudsen has seen that nurture can be important, if you fuck it up you'll have a fucked up kid. Too much nurturing will give you a useless man/child like kid unable to boil an egg. Too little nurturing will give you a kid with issues as to why they weren't loved enough, maybe they just weren't worth it.

Old Knudsen comes from the second one but with therapy and powerful medications he realises that if someone who is fucked up raises you they are more likely to raise you how they were raised. Not everyone can break the cycle because not everyone is self aware enough to even notice the cycle. Every child is worthy of love but of course they might not receive it and therefore won't take others into consideration because their feelings and needs weren't taken into consideration. They might not know how to.

When Jeb Bush was asked if he could go back through time would he kill little baby Hitler and he said, "Hell yeah, I would! You gotta step up, man."

Jeb Bush is a pro-life Conservative who defunded Planned Parenthood in Florida, yet he is all for killing babies as long as it's Hitler. Would you become a baby killing time traveler? I don't think it would stop WWII any. 
Hitler was a product of his time and experiences, his Da was an arsehole and he served during WWI, even if he was kind before that his experiences could have changed him. Hitler wasn't kind to anyone, he turned on those who were loyal to him, he turned on those who were different than what he liked and he turned on Germany itself, wanting to destroy it rather than giving it to the enemy.  He used fear of the other and we are the chosen ones to further his hate.
When someone is bigoted towards another, even if it's just not wanting to bake them a cake, I see a little of Hitler inside of them. The hate is still the same. He showed us that hate and fear only ends in destruction. 

 Bite marks on the bodies? I just don't believe it.

Ted Bundy grew up thinking that his mother was his sister and that his grandparents were his real parents. His mother claimed that servicemen were the father but they never existed and maybe it was Bundy's abusive, bigoted grandfather who was really his dad. He saw his animal abusing grandfather as being a positive male role model. His mother just simply refused to believe in Ted's guilt even after his execution. She lived life in denial and refused to talk about anything personal.  
Jeffrey Dahmer had an ordinary childhood, his mother had emotional problems sure, and his father was withdrawn and always working. No great trauma or serious abuse. Sometimes nature just makes bad ones and no amount of nurturing could have helped him. His father still blames himself for the 17 men and boys that Jeff had to dinner.

Parenting is a game of regrets and blame since it is taken from different perspectives.

Trump and Rudy discuss THOSE CHAIRS!!!!

Trump is the least kind Republican candidate and Hilary the the least kind Democrat. 16% of people would kick back and drink with Trump while 26% would drink with Hilary. Old Knudsen would totally ply Hilary with a few leg openers .... cos he is kind. 47% said no to drinks with either any of the Republican or Democrat candidates. 47% were obviously kill joys. 

Just imagine how racist Trump's Thanksgiving dinners would be after a few drinks, "As I am thankful for this turkey I remind you family that we need to kick out the immigrant scum like we did with those immigrant Indians on the first Thanksgiving" ...... huh?    

Hilary would be "what year is it? Do I like immigrants and gheys now or is it still the 90's when I didn't?"  A liar has to have a good memory, I can't recall who it was that said that. 

Bill Clinton nearly lost his political career because of refugees, he was very anti-Cuban refugee until he realised that the interns liked the Cuban put up em. 

No room at the inn, keep it moving terrorist.

Where do children learn to be kind? In my humble opinion it's from where the rest of us learn it, from example. 
It's ironic that during a time when refugees are being shunned while those left behind are being bombed that we have Thanksgiving and Christmas. Will people do what they do every year? Lets go to a homeless shelter to help out on one day a year so we can be smug and will they pretend to be nice people for 2 weeks like they do every December? 
Lets be not so cuntish, drink to excess, spend to excess then complain how broke we are ... damn you Santa!!!! 

Lets have a ton of food and give thanks, lets have a ton of food like baby Jesus had. It's as bad as those people all concerned about homeless veterans if the government suggests taking in refugees. You don't really care, you didn't care yesterday, 10 years ago or today so quit pretending .....  Unless you've actually devoted years to humanitarian work for the veterans of course and no, Facebook memes do not count. 

I love the smell of hypocrisy in the morning. 

I was wrong to speak out against refugees coming to Northern Ireland. Our government is ineffective, our services are stretched to almost breaking point but we're letting refugees in. I didn't do it because I was worried about terrorists, wise up, we have terrorists serving in our government for fucks sake, we have another name for terrorists here, we call them our next door neighbour. 

The refugee crisis is a point scoring thing here and is bringing in more voters for Sinn Fein, I get it, as usual doing things for the wrong reasons though some are actually doing it because they are kind. Our government always has money for things that suits them and we let them off with so much such as charities raising money for hospital machines and giving mental health services, the government should be paying for all that instead of paying buddies to be consultants or special advisers. 

The first 100 refugees are expected to arrive in December. I hope many more come, not because I turned kind for Christmas but because it is the decent thing to do and it's what the terrorist do not want. So fuck you terrorists.     

Children will become more kind when we the adults become more kind, they'll still be little selfish cunts but kinder ones. 


Tuesday, 24 November 2015

Jim Tandy: The Man Of The People

Looking around at the politicians of today I give to you Jim Tandy, the politician that the people deserve. He isn't running for the White House this time round as he has a few drug and hooker scandals he wants the public to forget about but in 2020 (assuming the world is still here) he'll be the next president of the US and maybe the world.

Raised on a small 500 acre farm in Virginia he was sent away to military school where he became a top ranking cadet earning several medals for neatness. His biggest regret was having to get 3 military deferments for serving in Vietnam as he was attending university then he developed a weak knee disorder which prevented him for serving. In his memoirs he he says that though he has always liked war with WWII being at the top of his favourites he feels as if his days at military school made up for not having served.

He married his sweetheart Thelma who he met at college and they had two girls. He settled down as a small town lawyer in mergers and acquisitions for Haliburton, he later became CEO of Tandy Plastics which provided toothbrushes and soap dishes all throughout the wars in Afghanistan and Iraq, he got the medal of freedom for his help in the wars.

He is now a Republican congressman for Virginia and here are his policies.

Gun Control: My finger is my safety, that is the only control we need. If the people of Paris had guns they wouldn't have been killed, if the children and teachers of Sandy had guns they would still be alive today. I have a gun strapped to my ankle and if someone with an AK-47 came here and started spraying bullets and throwing grenades I'd grab my snub nosed 38 revolver and my military training would kick in and I'd kill him. How many lives would I have saved in my wet dream fantasy in which I am the hero? Look, I'm getting hard just thinking about it.

Same Sex Marriage: I believe in live and let live but Jesus said that marriage is between a man and a woman, how cam fags have children? It doesn't make sense. You aren't born gay, Bruce Jenner is a Christian, Republican who believes in marriage, he was married 3 times ... to women! It was Hollywood and coffee enemas that turned him weird.

Abortion: Killing babies isn't right .... unless it's during war which is totally different. If women stopped believing the liberal agenda against American values and understood their place in the world then this country wouldn't be in the state it is now.

Healthcare: Anything Obama has done is wrong and those millions of Americans who didn't have healthcare were happy before he came along and forced it onto them. That's something that Stalin would have done.

Economy: We have a whole workforce of strong Americans that don't have jobs, put them to work in construction of pipelines and walls to protect our borders, pay them in patriotism and pride.

Immigration: America is a white Christian nation so send these foreigners back to their own countries. The statue of liberty says tired and huddled masses it doesn't say anything about foreigners or gays. This will end the persecution of us loving Christians if we are selective about who live in the US.

Refugees: We need a national database with every Muslim in it, some might call this racist but when they are screaming "Ali Baba" while trying to blow up a school bus full of unarmed American children they'll think twice. While the wars are going on maybe we should also put Muslims into camps, we did it in WWII and the only ones that complained then were the Japs cos they couldn't hara sushi us in our sleep. Remember when the Trojans took in refugees? If we don't learn from history we are doomed to repeat it. If they don't like it that can go back to Islam because this is free America! .... Also we can't bring refugees/potential terrorists over because it's too easy for them to get guns. 

Afghanistan and Iraq: I voted for the wars because I believe in wars. It's Obama's fault we haven't won so send over more troops including all those homeless vets I hear about on social media and bomb everything until it's free. We shouldn't be arming moderate Islamists, we should be arming everyone or we'll never make any money out of this. We need to fight them over there so we don't have to fight them here because everyone here has camera phones and wouldn't understand why we kill who we kill. If you don't support our troops as they invade and terrorize people we have no business terrorizing then you don't love America.

Patriotism: I would give my life for this beautiful nation, I wouldn't pay higher taxes as that's unAmerican, nor would I enlist in the military because of my knees .... my children probably have that too so they can't enlist either. It's every American's duty to serve its nation by buying several guns, waving some flags and not educating themselves too much. As I always say, "Commies don't listen to country music."

Socialism: The disease of the 20th century. Paying poor people to be poor is stupid, we need to cut Welfare programs before we become like Europe. Hitler was a socialist and so was Osama Bin Laden. We need to make the people work long hours for their poverty so they'll have some pride and self respect.

Crime: There are nearly 4 times as many black men incarcerated in US prisons than any other race, that tells me that we need to preemptively arrest black people before they commit crimes, statistics aren't racist they are facts. I'm the chairman for the Armcar private prisons group so I know what I am talking about. The government needs to put more funding into locking people up but Obama is weak when it comes to blacks and Muslims .... I'm sure you can guess why. Luckily some of us aren't biased and only have the nation's best interest at heart, that nation is the US, not Kenya by the way. We also need to be locking up more women as incarcerated males out number them 10 to one, what about equality? 

The Future: Since we are the only people to have put a flag onto the moon we own it. Lets make a base there so we can plant flags on other planets to own them too so if anyone wants to go to Mars they have to pay us a toll. We must build better ways to kill people from a distance if world peace is ever going to be achieved. We must turn the rest of the world into consumers and the product we sell is American freedumb. 

What policies would you implement?: In order to help law enforcement all Muslims, intellectuals, gays and people who wear glasses need to be put onto a database, maybe branded or to wear a number or symbol on their clothes. More law enforcement powers to seize property and people in the name of national security. Everyone to be armed .... except the high risk groups that lean towards unAmerican thinking. Lets put a drone in every middle class home so good people with American values can help in the wars against terror.

We also need to nuke Russia and Iran and possibly China and somehow manage to blame it on North Korea. Christianity put into every school and Sunday being an official day of rest .... except for the likes of fast food workers etc. We'll force everyone to convert to Christianity so we'll not have the problem of Islamics spreading their religion of hate. We'll also have selective breeding programs so we stay as God's image and since God cursed women with childbirth pain, should they really have a vote? A moon tax, why should the rest of the world enjoy the moon that we own for free? I will make America great again by changing it's name to the Great United States of America.

A true politician for today, he'll be the perfect president for the US.                           


Monday, 23 November 2015

How To Survive A Terrorist Attack


You have more chance of dying in a car crash, or in hospital for what you thought was a routine procedure than you have in a terrorist attack. Terrorists aren't a new thing so don't go getting paranoid all of a sudden, you probably haven't even seen one .... unless you work in the city centre of Belfast and terrorists come into your place of work for lunch or to buy stuff. Like criminals these terrorists can have done their time and are out on the streets again and sit nervously in their car while they send their girlfriend into yer place of work.

I only want to pretend to kill the Fenian bastards this time, it's art so it is. 

Aye I'm looking at you Michael Stone, one of many scumbags released from prison early thanks to the Good Friday Agreement. In 1988 he attacked an IRA funeral with a pistol and grenades in which he killed 3 people. He also confessed to having shot dead 3 other people who he said were IRA though they weren't. At the funeral he was overpowered by mourners who made sure the fucker permanently walk with a limp from a dislocated thigh bone. Here he is getting pinned by an old man and a woman while trying to blow up Gerry Adams and Martin McGuinness. His court room defense was that he was only pretending and that it was performance art.

If only the M-60 you have had a handle at the front so then you could stop it from shooting up and out of control like that, you'll hit fuck all lad. 

Without pandering to gun loving Americans who are gun fighting legends in their own minds I'm dealing with "normal" life situations or as they call them with a sneer "gun free zones." How we Europeans have the guts to go to the supermarket without a Glock strapped to our cocks is beyond me .... oh that's right, we aren't wimpy pussies. We don't need gun courage, we get all our courage from being half drunk all the time.

If a terrorist opens fire you probably won't expect it, that's the shit they do. At the Bataclan concert the audience thought it was fireworks or a part of the show. Many people suffer from Cognitive dissonance in which the facts of reality are uncomfortable for them so excuses are made for it. No evidence that the Bible isn't made up bullshit or that Jesus even existed .... blah blah blah I'm not listening to you Satan.

Those who will think of the worse case scenario do have a better chance of survival, they won't hang around and wait for it to blow over cos it's probably nothing ....  maybe it's performance art.

Movie guns and real guns sound different, if you aren't used to real guns then you might not know the difference from fireworks but an AK-47 fires a seriously strong 7.62 X 39 round which is quite deafening and scary if you aren't used to weapons. It will make you jump.When a gun is fired listen for the recoil sound, at a short distance you won't really hear it but at 100 metres away there will be an interval of a second before you hear what I'd describe as a dull clunk, so you have the thud of the bang followed by a clunk. The longer it is to hear the clunk the further away it is, judge a second for every 100 metres before you hear the clunk, it's like counting thunder. 

Sometimes you just know who'll freeze and shit themselves.

You have the Freeze, Flight or Fight response. 15% of those caught in an attack will respond in a way that helps them survive, 75% will freeze and not react at all while the other 10% will react but in ways that reduces their chances and will get in the way of the 15% ers. In a crowd, people tend not to want to be the one who reacts first but if you've thought it through that won't apply as much.

Terrorists will always choose targets that don't or can't fight back, they are cowards. They'll get you when you are out shopping, riding the train or even while at a remembrance service for war dead. I cannot express just how much I really hate terrorists, almost as much as I hate pedos. The spree shooters in the US aren't terrorists as terrorists want the population to fear more attacks from their group though what I'll tell you here can be applied to those shootings too.

The Bataclan in Paris was dimly lit and crowded, most people froze or were unable to get away because of the crowd. Some did run for the exits or hid behind speakers and tables, they are the ones that lived to tell what happened. Some took the chance and ran when the gunmen reloaded and they reloaded many times and still managed to kill 89 people there. A bullet from an AK-47 will go through more than one person in a crowd, like fish in a barrel.
Some played dead because they realised that every time the shooters saw movement or heard a sound there would be a burst of fire in that direction.
If you can't flee then make yourself a small target, hide behind something and stay still. Even if it isn't a bullet proof block wall the shooter probably won't fire if you are out of sight.

If you decide that you won't go down without a fight and you go all Ben Carson on them, well it doesn't always turn out great but what have you got to lose? You might save someone else. Military training does help and so does others willing to back you up.

Number 6 is a 28 year-old French banker who tackled the gunman first.  

The heroes of the train shooting got the attacker when his weapon jammed, Mark Moogalian #4 was shot but survived. The shooter had other weapons but they were on him before he could get sorted out. The shooter was also poorly trained. Many factors can lead to success or failure.

Adel Termos a 32-year-old car mechanic and father of two is a hero for his actions during the Beirut attack that social media kinda ignored in favour of Paris. A guy was running down the hill shouting screaming "Allahu akbar, Allahu akbar" and Termos pinned him down before he could get into a crowed mosque, the guy had an explosive vest on and killed them both. He didn't have to have a go but he did and he saved lives. That attack killed 41.

In Raiders of the lost Ark and the Michael Caine Movie The island you have people showing off their martial arts skills only to get shot, fighting is not a load of Kill Bill posing, get stuck in there and bite to kill if need be, honour and rules make you dead. 

To survive a terrorist attack you need to use some self defense, not grabbing pressure points to escape though everyone should know them just in case. 60 - 90% of communication is non-verbal so as in self defense the battle can be won if you avoid the fight completely by knowing the dangers. Why ignore 60 -90% of all information just because it isn't spoon fed to you?

When you walk down a street and there are a couple of dodgy blokes up ahead, you can change your route so you don't go past them and you can make it a point to always stay out of arms reach of doorways and parked cars, looking at your phone makes you a target who isn't paying attention. Don't be a Wild Bill  Hickok and sit with yer back to the room, have a wall at yer back and watch.

During my military training our class was interrupted by a bloke that had to talk to the teacher, after a minute he left and the class resumed. The teacher asked us to give a description of the man. Many of us just didn't even notice him, a nice trick, now I can give great descriptions. 

To get an idea of where you should be with paying attention go watch The Bourne Identity in which Jason Bourne tells the girl how he notices everything, it's his second nature to do so, it can be yours too with practice. When out and about you should size up the room or the bus or train etc, that means who is there, what is there and how can you escape if something happened, it's like being a prepper in yer mind. Preppers are slagged off for being nuts, while there may not be a WWIII until 2020 and zombies well don't exist they'll be ready for any other disaster while you die waiting on the government to help you so don't be so quick to slag them off just because nothing happens for a few years, being prepared takes the sting out of a nasty surprise.

Security operatives look for insiders and outsiders. The insider has the clothes, the I.D. to be there and fits in, outsiders are different and shouldn't be there.
You'd be stupid if you didn't use racial profiling but bear in mind that Dylann Roof doesn't look like any of these cunts so don't be stupid by thinking that every male of Middle eastern descent is a terrorist or every black guy wants to steal yer TV. Timothy McVeigh was a white army veteran Christian dude that blew up 168 people. Terrorists and other arseholes that kill come in all different flavours. Being white, a vet or a Christian doesn't mean shit, you get good and bad people everywhere.

Would you really trust a person who has to be told what is right or wrong from a holy book? ... one they probably have never read and really didn't understand what they did read because it is full of contradictory information.

Islam isn't violent, if the people who go into it are violent then they make 'their' Islam violent, just like Christianity, Judaism, Hinduism and Buddhism. Even Atheists can be violent, there were plenty of Atheists in the IRA.       

Outsiders are easier to spot, a group of men having hushed private conversations in public or taking too much of an interest on what is going on around them. Maybe how they are dressed, could their clothes conceal weapons?
Insiders may also give off having a more informed awareness of what is going on or may be agitated yet not really doing anything.
A security operative such as a police officer has a duty to take an interest and going up and talking to them  may also give clues on what they are about by how they react, private people don't have this option but if they know something then informing the police is the best thing to do.

For self defense awareness you need to get a baseline feel of the place. This means thinking about what is normal. Standing in line for a coffee and looking at everyone doing their thing, once you have a baseline then spotting an anomaly becomes easier.

You already have a lifetime of looking at people so build upon that and start to notice them. Ask yourself What is going on here? look at people and the environment, guy in a suit checking his phone, chick with big norks standing in the street laughing, solitary blokes standing quietly holding backpacks at each exit point. What would make someone stand out? Nervous, agitated, quiet, young men watching a worker's every move when it isn't even a hot chick, someone walking off without their bag. What would I do about it? Asking that question puts you ahead of the crowd and less likely to freeze. Check all exits which may include staff only doors, if you have children with you then get them to safety above all else. Look for cover, tables, doorways, behind cars, anything that will block the line of sight and prevent you from being a target. What weapons do you have? Cutlery, a bottle, a walking stick maybe just keys. You also have nails, teeth, feet, a solid head and your biggest weapon of all yer brain .... some people have bigger weapons than others.

You don't have to outrun the bear, you just have to be faster than yer friends. In reality people still help others when faced with an attack, look to the heroes of 9/11 for some great examples of humanity.   

Old Knudsen enjoys watching people, not just strippers and it's amazing just how invisible you become at the mall by standing quietly out of the way. Where would a terrorist situate themselves? You wouldn't place yourself in amongst the targets, you'd be off to the side, maybe waiting for your buddies to get into place or for the place to fill up more.

The Paris killings had them just walking up and starting in for maximum effect and surprise, but the doors have to be open. People were watching football, eating or rocking out to notice. It would be natural to freeze at first as the first moments are the most dangerous and luck is the main factor for not getting it in the first wave of attack. A deer trapped in the headlights is easy to aim for.  

The chances of you being attacked by terrorists are slim, yer more likely get mugged or yer purse snatched. Being aware of your surroundings and things like why is this person in my peripheral vision talking an interest in me? It can all help. Who is watching you at the ATM? Who is standing behind you at the checkout? Who is rubbing their crotch and licking their lips as you are walking to yer car?  ... aye, that would be me.

Tis the season for stealing, the Christmas period means that many are not thinking about security and are carrying more money for presents. Coats, bags, phones and whatever is left unattended is ripe for the taking. While eating out, place bags in direct sight of you and not where people walk by, under the table is best.
Handbags have straps so keep them closed and zipped up and their strap inside the leg of yer chair by yer feet and wear them across yer body, not over one shoulder and also wear them towards the front of you with the flap against yer body if it has one.

If you are prepared for crime then it's a small step to be prepared for a terrorist attack. Being aware and paying attention can be pro active in preventing getting into trouble in the first place.   




Friday, 20 November 2015

Only Grownups Can Have Peace

I was reading an article from an Israeli writer who was saying that the rest of the world needs to now finally learn from Israel on how to handle terrorists. They have been doing it on a daily basis and this writer thinks they know it all. He even praised Benjamin Netanyahu's plan on how to deal with Iran that was brushed aside by a know nothing Obama, yeah the writer was a little bias. 

If you went by how the Israeli's treat the Palestinians you'd see that they aren't just trying to keep themselves safe but that they really don't like them, it works both ways as many Palestinians hate Jews. This doesn't mean that they all hate each other, the angry ones always tend to have the louder voices and after a while just plain decency becomes harder to do. 

Israel was founded by people who were terrorists, the Stern gang and the Irgun being the main two. In 1946 the Irgun blew up the King David Hotel in Jerusalem, killing of 91 people. 41 Arabs, 28 British and 17 Jews. Sounds like something the IRA would do. Sure the Arabs were carrying out acts of terror too but they weren't very well coordinated ....  much like our Loyalist paramilitaires. 

In March 1947, martial law was enforced when 16 Brits were killed. That year the Irgun claimed to have killed 347 Arabs and British. The Stern gang killed 28 servicemen when they blew up the Khantara to Haifa Express in 1948. From 1947 -1948 214 British servicemen were killed. The British soldiers did fear the Jews far more than the Arabs.  

My point is that the Israelis didn't have that far to fall in order to become as bad as their enemy, they were already there. 

In Northern Ireland we were having similar experiences to the Israelis but people either don't know or forget about this tiny backwards tagnut on the arse of Britain. Both our sides hated each other's very existence. As like in Palestine both had their terrorists, their supporters, the decent people and of course British, trying to enforce law and not always getting it right. 

Belfast city center had checkpoints at the main streets, you'd get patted down by a soldier or police officer, the females and children would have female police officers, your bags and strollers would all get checked too. Buses would have someone come on and walk through the bus to make sure there were no suspicious objects left behind. 
We had armed police and soldiers doing daily patrols. Funny how all of that including being evacuated for a bomb alert becomes normal. Bus or train delays because of suspect devices didn't strike fear into your heart, they became an annoyance. Did the terrorists not have anything better to do? 

Most buildings had bollards to prevent cars being driven into them, taxi depots which have always been a source of employment for terrorists and their supporters had bullet proof widows, buzzers to let you in and glass windows like you'd see in a bank. Bus drivers still sit in a little plastic glass cage. Bars and clubs had bouncers who would search you on the way in. 

     A normal world of cages and turnstiles. 

Is that what the rest of the world needs to be like? You don't notice half the stuff until it's gone and maybe it all did raise tensions just a bit as a subconscious reminder that you had to be alert. People become suspicious of everything and notice strangers very easily. Walking into a pub and having everyone turn their head gave you the knowledge that maybe you had to tread carefully in that place. 

 Soldiers and police had to be secretive, loose lips not only sunk ships but targeted your family. Unlike England and the US you wouldn't catch a soldier in uniform off duty and police always ate takeaway during their breaks. 
A haircut, your body language and even your clothes can be a give away to which side you are from. Knowing a person's name can tell you if they are Protestant or Catholic 98% of the time or a local just knows. 
The English soldiers hated civvies because they were all paddys to them and the civvies hated squaddies.    

I'm sure Israel is very similar to Northern Ireland during the Troubles. 

We prescribed to YOLO before it was even a thing, we worked hard and played hard and didn't let the daily news of death or the near misses in real life get to us, some really bad tragedies did give us pause to reflect as if it wasn't us who got the unlucky terrorist lottery it was someone we knew. 

Should the west really live like this? Can the west live like this? Before there were cell phones and Facebook people were mostly secretive about where or what they are doing but the younger generation that didn't have that worry posts their every move and who their friends are. They are even slack with their online security never mind who or what is about them.  

Here is a picture I took of the same place where the cage and the barriers would have been. Now it is all open, buses trundle through at speed, guys in red jackets look out for anyone who looks like a tourist to try to sell them a seat on a city tour bus where you can see our murals and where the Titanic was built. The road sweeper has to stop for a chat because hey, it beats working.

Ugly ass expensive sail like things stick out of the street for no reason but we haven't gone full soft, you can see the mast with a CCTV camera on it, we are always being watched. 

 Some homes still need protection.

We should protect ourselves but not in cages and behind bullet proof glass, that changes you, that makes you mean. What happens when the barriers come down? Then you realise all the little things you've missed that everyone else takes for granted, you become just a pleb, a person rather than a potential terrorist and that's nice. All that alertness you got so used to having is no longer needed and gets in the way of living. Being on full alert is tiring for normal people but is second nature to anyone who has lived with terrorism. 

When the cages come down you realise that you are more than just a target and those years of refusing to think about things end, and you can fully embrace your depression that you drank to forgot and your PTSD can be recognised, just like everyone else's.       

Israel needs to be more like us, not the other way round. We won with compromising and addressing the real grievances that the other side has and maybe by admitting that some of the shit we did wasn't cool. 

We accepted that hey maybe the enemy isn't a blood crazed fiend who takes orders from the Pope and just isn't like us .... except they are. We finally see that religion is just an excuse to be a dick and you could just as easily switch out religions for football teams and see it's all gang related and totally primitive and tribal. 

When both sides are at fault it's easy to get caught up in the tit for tat bickering that mirrors the tit for tat violence. 
Peace can only happen when those sides doing the fighting listen to how fed up the decent people are with it all. 

Thursday, 19 November 2015

Aim To Please Not Shoot To Kill

Jeremy Corbyn who is the leader of UK's Labour party can be compared to Bernie Sanders if Sanders was a weeping pussy douche canoe has said that he is not happy with the UK shoot to kill policy in case of a terrorist attack.

He said it was "quite dangerous and can often can be counterproductive."  Remember in 2005 when Jean Charles da Silva e de Menezes from Brazil was shot 7 times in the head with hollow point bullets by undercover cops in London? .... the other 4 shots missed.

Turned out he wasn't a terrorist nor had anything to do with terrorism ... what a drag huh, that was pretty counterproductive.

The police thought he might have explosives and he was on a train so apart from killing an innocent man they followed procedure for killing a suicide bomber. It's best to get them in a certain part of their head between their eyes on the forehead so if they had a bomb their reflexes wouldn't clench when shot .... that's the theory and is backed up by places like Israel and Indonesia who have had to deal with many bombers.

Corbyn, who is friends with Sinn Fein who really didn't like it when the SAS shot some of their IRA chums thinks that maybe we should arrest the terrorists by politely waiting until they are out of bullets and have gotten rid of their anger, then they will be more agreeable to being arrested and to face justice in court.

Tasers should not be used in case the terrorist has a heart condition. 

We should really remember that the ISholes are victims too and maybe the lack of a strong male role model in their lives have turned them into misogynistic, bigoted psychopaths so after they serve a few months in prison (if they are found guilty) they should then be ordered asked to take some self awareness classes and checked on every fortnight to see how they are doing.

He has a plan for the military too as he thinks that airstrikes in Syria and Iraq will just make people more angry and will not achieve anything.
All guns and rockets will be replaced with paint guns, they will shoot out a calming blue or light purple and thus putting people into a better mood for peace.

 Reality check:

As we have seen from the London bombing, Boston and Paris, these guys will shoot and bomb without any issues to public safety so our people need to be able to do the same to them to avoid further loss of life.

These ISholes probably don't know that much about grand schemes or other plots and once we know them we know their associates so dead or alive .... whatever.

By now you should know that Old Knudsen thinks that if you rob someone else of their humans rights such as rape or murder then you forfeit your own.

These scum brainwash kids to do their killing, these brainwashed kids are victims but now they are killers trained to not hesitate, we shouldn't have to hesitate either.

Corbyn is an idealist more likely to call the scumbag terrorists of the world "freedom fighters" he has no place in a government that has to take on such people. He'd have taken Hitler's word that he wouldn't invade the Hinterland, Corbyn belongs in a cuntry like Sweden, not one that plays on the world stage because the world is a scarey and dangerous place full of nasty people, greet them with a handshake and when it suits them you'll be dead in the desert.    

There should be decent people in government but not ones with their heads up their holes.