Sunday, 14 June 2015

Naked Climbers Cause Earthquake With Their Skinny Butts

Malaysia's sacred Mt Kinabalu is no place to get naked, the dead people don't like it and according to deputy chief minister Joseph Pairin Kitingan the reason why 18 people were killed in a 5.9 earthquake was because days earlier some tourists stripped off for selfies.... nothing to do with tectonic plates, sounds something that you'd hear a Turk or Iranian say. #boobquake

The British are shocked because Eleanor Hawkins, who recently graduated with a masters in aeronautical engineering from Southampton University can be seen on the right with the blokes all looking at her. The British don't do nudity, how shocking.

Also charged with obscenity were three others, 2 Canadians and one Dutchman who were accused of urinating on the mountain (no public restrooms in butt fuck Malaysia) and telling the guide to "go to Hell" .... Lets just blame the Dutchman shall we?

Eleanor served 3 days in jail and was fined £1000, she is now back in the UK getting told off by her Da for letting a fuckwit of a Canadian post the pics to social media ... ok the Da said halfwit but he meant fuckwit.

Stripping off at tourist sites seems to be a trend like plonking and licking eye balls. Usually for Brits they get drunk on holiday and start an international incident for blasphemy or they fall off a balcony and die. No one in their right mind climbs a fucking mountain, do you know how hard it is to drink and climb?
Yes we do go to foreign cuntries to get blocked, it's a nice change from getting blootered at home. 

The British press (especially the Daily Mail) are outraged at Eleanor, probably because she was sober when she took her clothes off and didn't get raped .... the DM loves a bit of rape.

Mount Kinabalu, beautiful, majestic and hairy. It reaches 13, 435 feet high and on the Wikipedia page it says fuck all about any weirdy woo dead spirits.

Oh no, now a ritual has to be done to "appease the mountain spirit" or it will cause another earthquake. I say ATTACK! should a mountain full of dead spirits be allowed to willy nilly kill people? No one should have that power ..... I'm looking at you Obama lord of the drones.

Going to other cuntries, insulting other cultures, this is the 21st century and in the free world we do that kind of shit to primitives. If you had oil we'd kill you all but butt fuck Malaysia doesn't even have any toilets and keeps losing airplanes.

         Stick yer hand into that gash and pull yerself up.

Urinating on a mountain, when you gotta go ..... telling the guide to go to Hell, maybe it was a test of his guiding skill, I would have told him to "fuck off" maybe I'd thrash him with my riding crop too .... stripping off, well we're all naked under our clothes, I don't think the spirits give a fuck since they probably remember when the locals walked around naked themselves and besides, when yer dead you've got bigger things to think about. 

Seriously though when you insult other nations (we all do it) post to social media after yer out of that cuntry or it'll be pitchforks and burn the witch! 

Get over yerself  Malaysia and be grateful of the tourist money spent considering people have to piss outside, you found yon plane yet? Didn't think so.   

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