Saturday 8 November 2014

The Welsh Zombie Face Eater

It was just a matter of time that Wales started turn evil, cases of pedophilia have been in the news with more than 114 Registered Sexual Offenders living in the Bridgend and the Vale of Glamorgan areas.  

Five-year-old April Jones was abducted and murdered in Wales in 2012 and the singer of the Welsh rock band Lostprophets was jailed for depraved acts against children, these were the most high profile cases of late. 

This is because of the Cardiff riff, similar to the one in Leeds and known in the US as Hellmouths which can be found in Florida, Arizona, Texas and Cleavland to name a few. 

Ebola is said to have crawled out of a riff in Africa according to CIA sources. 



Cerys Yemm a tasty 22 year-old shop assistant was chatted up in a bar by 34 year-old Matthew Williams. He invited her back to his hotel the Sirhowy Arms hotel in South Wales. He was recently released from prison after serving 5 years for a violent attack on his former partner. The hotel acts as a as a bail hostel so don't go thinking it's all swanky, it's a fucking bed and breakfast for scumbags.

Williams who is thought to have taken cocaine before the attack went nuts and started to eat her face, it is unsure what actually killed her though having yer face eaten wouldn't have been very good for her.
The security guard at the hotel saw Williams eating one of her eyeballs .... eyeballs are a good source of water if yer thirsty, so is the tap in the sink.

A policewoman arrived and tasered Williams who then died. Did he have a heart attack or can zombies be killed by electrocution? Gwent Police have yet to return my e-mails.

Some harsh lessons can be learned from this tragedy such as don't trust zombie criminal wife beaters who pick you up in a bar, have better taste in men, especially the ones who want to taste you. Ms Yemm's former boyfriend was jailed for 3 years when he set fire to his home in a in a botched suicide bid after they split up so she seemed to be attracted to the unstable type, why does Old Knudsen never meet this kind of lass?

As the riff vibrates with evil this kind of thing will become common place.

 


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