Tuesday, 15 July 2014

Israel Buys Some Fleggers

Israeli Prime Minister Benjmain Netanyahu met with David Cameron in Jerusalem to discuss some new immigration initiatives between Israel and the UK.

Netanyahu had been trying to broker peace with the terrorist group Hamas when an aide who had studied American history came up with a better idea.

Back in the 1600's the soft English Puritans were having trouble with the native American tribes who were not giving up their land fast enough so 8 families from Northern Ireland were brought over to be neighbours with the Indians.

The Puritans wrote:

One familie from ye olde north of Ireland can cause the trouble of foure.  Their jeers of Yeooowww! and the constant drum beating and fife playing is enough to drive anyone insane and I am of no doubts that the red skinned savages will succumb and move on.    

The plan worked very well and the Scots/Irish became the backbone of the new nation, a people from which many presidents came from.

Many homes on Twaddell ave in Belfast have gone up for sale thanks to the loyalist protest camp there.
Some think it's a ploy by the Orange Order to buy up cheap properties so they'll be allowed to march there.

Netanyahu went on, "We welcome the sons of Levi to the promised land and have a beautiful settlement all ready for you."

David Cameron seemed to be in a giddy mood as if he couldn't believe his luck and suggested a figure of 1 million people and the UK will pay the travel costs.

Lets hope these lucky people who are being offered these holiday homes read the fine print about converting to Judaism, ouch I'm crossing my legs just thinking about it. 

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