Wednesday, 10 July 2013

Tigers like to play


Sumatran tigers are cute and cuddly, I think you'll all agree. Then why the fuck have five Indonesian men have been trapped up a tree since last Thursday? ascared of the fluffy wuffy tigers. Sure one of their mates got ripped apart by one but to be fair he did have bacon deodorant on that day.

Allegedly they were trying to trap deer for food, but one of the traps caught a tiger cub instead ...  the bastards!
Animals can be funny when you kill their young, Old Knudsen was stalked by a panda for 12 nights when he hunting for baby panda fur for Jean Paul Gaultier.

Tigers are like big pussy cats, fleggers often let their unwanted children be raised by them ever since the English killed off the wolves a few centuries back. The English will kill anything ... makes me proud. Ireland, north and south has a large and thriving back yard tiger population.
 Tigers are only messing, they can climb trees no probs, get with the fun! 

The men used their cell phones to call for help ... ach the times have a changed. Local villagers tried to rescue them, but were scared off by the four large tigers still circling the tree.... lol.

So to rescue these 5 poofs there is a 30 man team at the ready. The police chief says it could take some time if the tigers are still messing about and they may have to sedate them. 

Top tips for dealing with tigers.

Strip off yer clothes and slowly start stroking yer penis, the tiger will be confused and stop any attack.
Try to get behind the tiger, it will think yer going to bum it and run away. If you get a ghey tiger you may have to shag it but thats better than being mauled.

Old Knudsen is just assuming that it would be a man in tiger trouble as weemen usually aren't that stupid.

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