Monday, 15 July 2013

The World Needs More David Hasslehoff

"But your sign has no question mark," ...."It's a rhetorical question " .... "I don't think that means what you think it means"... "Do you know what fuck off means?"

The residents of Ardoyne have put out a call to celebs to help them with their infestation of Loyalist rioters. Since the Orange Order politicians get bricked when they call for peace it is thought that only celebs can help, and none of yer The Voice  or The way is Essex wasters, we want real celebs.

Put in some soap and they'll move soon enough. 

Ross Kemp a soap actor and TV presenter was at ground zero to acess the situation for his new show 'When extreme cunts go bad'  Some suspect he was only there for his show and not for peace.

"Listen Matt, I need your officers to show a little more emotion ... it's the eyes Matt, people see it in the eyes ."

Step aside plebs. He got the Berlin wall to come doon so I'm sure he can get a few morons to behave with maybe a dazzling smile or a song, I hope he knows some sashbash tunes.

Ach isn't he just lovely? I'm wet and it's not from the water cannons ... Lets stop being dicks and behave like grown ups.

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