Monday, 14 January 2013

Yummy Living Bread


The thing about Christianity that upsets Old Knudsen is that they are obsessed with zombies .... it's not natural. Zombies and having sex with children.

The whole symbolic cannibalism with wine and wafers is just weird. Lets pretend that this is some blokes flesh and here is some of his blood.

WTF is this Halloween or something? lets peel some grapes and use them for eyeballs too.

John 6:50-71
This is the bread that comes down from heaven, so that one may eat of it and not die. I am the living bread that came down from heaven. If anyone eats of this bread, he will live forever. And the bread that I will give for the life of the world is my flesh.” The Jews then disputed among themselves, saying, “How can this man give us his flesh to eat?” So Jesus said to them, “Truly, truly, I say to you, unless you eat the flesh of the Son of Man and drink his blood, you have no life in you. Whoever feeds on my flesh and drinks my blood has eternal life, and I will raise him up on the last day. ..

 Even zombies have to hydrate.

If you get bit by a zombie or get their blood into your mouth or something you'll turn into one of them.
So Jesus was like a zombie groomer. Those Jews were probably just right to set the Romans onto him. The world would be full of walkers if they didn't ..... Well done hooked nosed money lenders.

Then there is this

Mark 7:1- 37
Now when the Pharisees gathered to him, with some of the scribes who had come from Jerusalem, they saw that some of his disciples ate with hands that were defiled, that is, unwashed. (For the Pharisees and all the Jews do not eat unless they wash their hands, holding to the tradition of the elders, and when they come from the marketplace, they do not eat unless they wash. And there are many other traditions that they observe, such as the washing of cups and pots and copper vessels and dining couches.) And the Pharisees and the scribes asked him, “Why do your disciples not walk according to the tradition of the elders, but eat with defiled hands?” .

So according to Christianity it's ok not to wash yer hands before you eat and it's not as if they used a knife and fork back then. I've always called Jesus a dirty hippy.
So after pulling off yer camel you go and dip yer hands into the communal foods.  Not wanting to be confused with a pedo Christian, Old Knudsen will be washing his hands before eating, a thing not big in the UK, at most people will rinse under water for 4 seconds and wipe their hands clean on their arse. So the Jews got it right again.
Of course sucking off young boy's willies while yer circumcising them .... yer all fucked in the head.