Thursday, 25 October 2012

Gail Walker Hates Halloween

Its October, the Christmas decorations are already being put up in Belfast. Old Knudsen feels like an angry e-mail coming on.

The Yanks will be saying WTF? its not even Thanksgiving yet, you have Halloween, Thanksgiving then Christmas ... boom boom boom, not a half arsed don't know how to do Halloween, no Thanksgiving and then Christmas getting earlier and earlier.

No wonder lots of suicides occur during the holiday season, its half a year long now for fucks sake. Oh and the marching season .... why the fuck is that still going on?

Christmas and the marching season, both allegedly Christian things, Old Knudsen thinks that Halloween gets side lined because its the devil's celebration. They took Christmas and Easter away from the Pagans, now they just want to wipe out Halloween. 

Its the time when you reflect upon the coming winter and pray that you have enough food stored to see you through it.You also reflect on those who have left this world and remember that we are never alone, there are spirits around us always, even more during the dark days.

Have a heart its fun!

In the blog on paper known as the Belfast Telegraph .... it pretends to be a newspaper but reads more like a fluffy blog.
Some woman was lamenting over how the wee celebration of Halloween was becoming bigger and Americanised.
Gail Walker, yer a dick!
I hate the season of ghosties and goulies. There was a time when Halloween was one of those poor emaciated holidays when a straggle of kids would ring on the door and tell the restive householder that indeed Halloween was coming and their efforts would be rewarded with a handful of sweets and that was that ... But not anymore. 
Just like Valentine's Day and Mother's and Father's Day, Halloween is becoming a holiday when we are forced to do our civic and patriotic duty and spend a fortune to keep the retail sector going.
for about a fortnight beforehand, your street sounds like a cheap recreation of the Battle of Somme as bangers ruin the silence and scare the cats and dogs.

Miserable cunt! kids knocking yer door saying, 'Halloween is coming the goose is getting fat, please put a penny in the old man's hat' ........ what? you want money? Maybe 2 out of 5 of them have a cheap false face, the rest of the 12 year-olds would just have their hoods up. Its like extortion. Yon rhyme is also used for Christmas, its pathetic. Also during 5th November 'Fireworks night' or 'Guy Fawkes night' they'll do the same with the hoods and say 'penny or the guy' .... oh expect yer windows to get done in if you give these little thugs a penny. You have to assert dominance.

They don't shoot off fireworks in the weeks leading up to Halloween in America, try to get out more. Fireworks is more 4th July. 

Nowadays, you're some kind of miseryguts if you don't have a luminous skeleton or at the very least an electric pumpkin in your window. Don't be surprised if a friend throws a Halloween party and you're expected to trot off to the party costume shop to spend £30 on badly-fitting nylon

Oh no, spending  £30 on a fun costume rather than fake tans and slut wear. How terrible.

Even worse is the growing Americanisation of what used to be a sweet little pagan holiday. Shiny faced kids in professionally made Spiderman costumes now come to your door demanding 'Trick or Treat?' Trick or Treat?
So yer Pagan then? away an fuck. The Americans made Christmas what it is today, you wouldn't have Rudolf without them and they've turned Halloween into a fun time.

This lot would get fucked up by local yobs or told to fuck off if they went round the doors here.
What happened to a wee ditty about the goose, the penny and your old man's hat? Where do they think they are? Seattle? Memphis? Albuquerque.

You'll wear a fucking Halloween mask ya silly bint. 

No, they are in butt fuck Northern Ireland where kids are disrespectful and didn't grow up having fun when they were kids cos their parents spent all the money on drink and fegs. Northern Ireland has fuck all for children. You go trick or treating you'd get cigarettes or mini bottles of booze. 
Gail Walker, go get a real job and stop talking shite, I won't get into her rant about how its only female performers like Cheryl Cole that get slagged off for not being able to sing live. Simon Le Bon, Bob Dylan, Milli fucking Vanilli.

Go carve a turnip!