Monday 2 April 2012

William Shatner Dead


Today is a sad day for the world. Canadian actor and superstar William Shatner died at his Malibu home aged 81.
Best known for his role as Captain James T Kirk in the Star wars movies he has also made a name in the music and porn industries and also bred with horses for charity.

Shatner who is beloved the world over was married 4 times and had 12 children, we also believe his penis was slightly above the average in size and had a purple tint to it after making the porn movie "Thrusters on full" in which he was captured on the planet Bulbus 9 and forced to have intercourse with the purple inhabitants .

 Known for being an asshole in his early career Shatner mellowed in his later years, only gingers had anything to fear from the aging icon as he despised them with all his being. It is thought he was bit by a ginger person when he was a child.

At his ranch in Hollywood Shatner held many celebrity ginger hunts attended by fellow ginger haters such as Paul Newman, Carly Simon and Micky Rourke.

Rest in peace Mr Shatner, there will never be another like you.    


1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Some might say he died when he hosted the Junos, the Canadian music awards show, on April 1.