Thursday, 28 October 2010

TV Presenter Says Fuck!




Ruth Langsford some British daytime television hoor who Old Knudsen wouldn't know if she passed him in the street was trying to get to one side of the TV studio to the other off Camera but didn't make it and so said, ''Oh fuck, we're not there yet!'' which was heard by dozens of desperate hoosewives across the cuntry.

Langsford is married to Norn Iron fat fuck Eamonn Holmes and presents a TV show with him.

Ok so it was a slip of the tongue like the time she said, "fuck it" in March 2009 and she wasn't giving the go ahead for Eamonn to get a battered sausage supper if ya know what I mean. Back then she said she was misheard and she said, "suck it" which is totally fine for daytime telly . Now the saucy bint claims she stubbed her toe and said "fuck" and apologised on her Twitter page and also on the telly. Old Knudsen always follows his swear words with "were not there yet" but he does not believe Langsford.

Why do you have to lie?



Just cum out and announce yer a dirty mouthed slapper and the cuntry will respect you. Holmes is a total wanker and has been known to let the odd profanity slip especially if you get in his way in real life. Like the comedian who did an ongoing gag about Holmes eating everything in sight then saying ,"I was fierce hungry, so I was" only to be threatened with legal action and his joke removed from the BBC and a public apology given to Holmes.

Old Knudsen has never liked Holmes and doesn't like his wife but its a small cuntry so I'm bound to see them at some time in Tescos. I saw yer man Christopher Eccleston who played Dr Who at the job centre the other day. Old Knudsen was looking for a job or at least pretending to in order to get some of the free money the government doles out . I waved to him and said, "So ya left Dr Who so ya wouldn't get type cast, that GI Joe was a great flick!" Yet again more celebrity swearing.

Speaking of fuckers that need to die. Yon ice-cream man drives past my hoose playing the Teddy bear's picnic very loudly about 3 times a day, I'm going to find out where he lives and play the Entertainer at full blast on his days off. FUCK!......... we're not there yet.

7 comments:

MJ said...

It’ll be the Glasgow Ice Cream Wars all over again.

Heff said...

Hell, I figured you cats could say whatever the fuck you wanted to on the telly.

Princess said...

perhaps the foul mouthed cow thought she was still in the bedroom...

Reggie said...

Honesty is the best policy. If she likes to curse she should say so. If he likes to dress in drag to walk the dog, he should say so.

You seriously left the States to listen to people curse back home. There are plenty of us here who like to use profanity.

CyberCaptain said...

Fucking great yarn :)

63mago said...

Holy shit *snif*, yer back!

Donn Escapeons said...

As long as the Ravens guard the Tower, and Prince Fillup & his "Cabbage" are polishing the Crown Jewels, there will be no f*ckity-f*cks on daytime TV.
Hear Hear!