Tuesday, 23 March 2010

Pan's Labyrinth With Ballroom

Yes it is all me Hoggle now fuck off or start Goblin!

Now where was I?

I want you to love me, fear me , I shall be your slave and you my Queen!

Like total OMG! I'm only 15 you know and look at the size of that thing in your pants. One time at fat camp I nearly made out with a girl in the shower but she was like WTF? hello boundaries!

Daddy daddy get it out of here, well hung underground!

Old enough to wish your baby brother into a Goblin realm old enough to breed.

No wait the crystal says you'll end up with a skinny, gingerish English bloke that actually likes women. I'm confused yet again, damn you Mick Jagger. I now see my true queen sitting on the throne .

You have no power over me .................. well maybe just a little bit. I was born to be a Goblin and swallowing queen....................... First I was afraid I was petrified, well this is the bog of eternal stench.

Ha ha ha I didn't see that coming , just look at all the fucking fruits in this post this is no place for Ares, manly God of war! Oh look wine coolers it beats getting blood out of this rock.

Hey look Herc a party, do you think we'll fit in? ............. Yes Frodo I think we just might.

Years later:

Hi I'm Paul Bettany you may know me from some Television work and playing Geoffrey Chaucer in A knight's tale. I so wanna do you...................... OMG I want your ginger cock like so bad dude.

The End

Old Knudsen was hanging around the Whitehoose yesterday when he was grabbed by the arm by that sex crazed cougar Nancy Pelosi who begged Old Knudsen to take her to the oval orifice for a quickie. Old Knudsen sighed and resigned himself to a minute and a half of hell but then we were both swept into a room full of media with Obama sitting at a table.

Joe Biden was tripping as usual "Mr. President, this is a big fucking deal," he said as he bounced around, "Joe Biden says this is fucking big and Joe Biden should know since Joe Biden grew up in fucking Scranton bitch" he excitedly remarked to a wee fat black boy.

Fuck! Old Knudsen hates it when people speak in the third person and he can't abide when they speak in the second person, who the fuck are they Elmo?

Since no one will pay Old Knudsen I sent Health care companies some ideas like dropping sick people off their rolls and raise the premiums before this crazy shit goes into action. Much like the banks did with credit cards before they got more regulations.

Old Knudsen is for sick and poor people getting health care and he just doesn't mean Africa and Haiti only a racist cunt gives money to them, we 'whitey' are now a minority in the world so Old Knudsen has started 'savewhitey.com' ach c'mon, people wanna save sharks and rare flies so why not us crackers? Did you know that 3 out of 10 Caucasian/American people of no colour cannae afford cable TV ............ its sad isn't it?

Across the country, activist groups, legislators and state officials are considering an array of legal maneuvers designed to prevent all or part of the national health care reform effort from coming into law within their borders.

America is a big fucking cuntry and takes up a lot of map coverage so when you see the words 'United' states of America you might think of people paying higher taxes to give themselves and others in their united world a better quality of life, like say in the United Kingdom. WRONG! its everyman/woman/gurlyboy for themselves.

The health care reforms won't work not just because Americans are stupid and selfish, it won't work because Americans are stupid and selfish. I mean going to the Bible for a decision on who can and who can't get married and the the place doesn't even have a state/states religion.

Its funny how presidents sign a bill that will finish after their 4 years is up, in all my jobs I've had to finish my work before I could go home.

Old Knudsen isn't a lefty or a righty, he thinks with his arm sized penis in the centre but if Republicans had a health care system already in place then maybe legends like John Wayne, Rock Hudson, Burt Reynolds and Ronald Reagan wouldn't have died...... just a thought you legend killers......................... the term legend killer does in no way suggest the Jews were wrong to kill Jesus, he was a trouble maker and would not have supported the state of Israel.

Today Old Knudsen searched for answers and so studied the Holy Bible, Koran and Torah, from 500 metres in high wind, God did not save any of his books and they are really holy. The moral of this long and hard post is that Jennifer Connelly looked better at 15 but Old Knudsen would totally tap her.



dai said...

Can you believe that fucker is still left handed? Maybe this health care reform can find a cure for it.

Heff said...

Yeah, that Joe Biden is a slick motherfucker isn't he ?

Anonymous said...

Is the lass in the last picture one of this sexinthecity-bitches?

Old Knudsen said...

Dai. Left handed people owe the Devil a days work.... thats in the Bible!

Heff. Fucking right he is.

Mago. You just upped yer coolness factor by 80% for not knowing the sex in the city bitches and no she isn't.

donn w2Nz said...

Biden is only a heartbeat from the Presimadency!

Jennifer was one of the most visually perfect fantasy gals in the solar system and then she through it all away to become a serious actress..sonofabitch!

This healthcare fiasco will never-EVER be solved until all of the Republicans are raptured.

donn w2Nz said...

and damn those Flight Of The Conchords because every time I see pictures of Buhwee I hear their silly songs in me 'ead!
Buhweez in spaaaaaaiiiisssss

Old Knudsen said...

His pants are under pressure.

Reggie said...

Nancy Pelosi seems like a real bitch.