Monday, 1 March 2010

Beware Of Bald Animals

Old Knudsen has kept quiet about the killing of an animal trainer at SeaWorld Orlando by a performing killer whale but he cannot hold his tongue any longer.

Dawn Brancheau a 40 year-old with a history of swimming with whales was grabbed by 12,000-pound Tilikum AKA 'Shamu' and drowned and tossed about as is the way of an orca, much like the way a dog would shake its prey to break it.

In 91 and 99 Tilikum also played a part in the deaths of two others but hey the show must go on and Tilikum has performed again though the trainers are staying out of the water until another review to clear the large fish posing as a mammal under a false name has taken place.

One expert said this is not normal killer whale behaviour but captive animal frustration but we have seen free orcas catching seals and tossing them into the air for fun .

Seal was not available for comments about being tossed but I bet Heidi being German and all does it by the numbers, a very efficient people yet total losers.

Are wild animal trainers thick as pig shit ? of course you'd go into a crib or den of lions because they are big cuddly wuddly pudy cats.

Look at this one wouldn't you just like to give it a big hug?

Or even a polar bear I know I'd like to ruffle up that fur with my face though watch out for the gulls, related to Velociraptors you know.

A big fuck off Tsunami, Steve Irwin being murdered by a peaceful stingray, the numerous wildfires and earthquakes. I say we have warred against each other for long enough, our main common enemy is nature.

Kill the whales, preemptive strike the parks and wooded areas, show nature we are not bitches that can be killed without a fight.

The cute doggies, lions and polar bears can stay but anything with killer in its title or lemurs have to go and that includes bees but not African bees because that would be racist .......... or would leaving them out be racist?

Part black part white just like Obama and Halle Berry though I wouldn't call them murderers just yet.
Don't see colour just see killer and um kill them. Do farm animals like cows, pigs and chickens not like to be killed for our food? You can trust me as I am an expert about things most people haven't even thought of yet.

Moby dick would kill you without treatment

As would the rage filled music dude .


donn w2Nz said...

HA! I love this..Seal..Moby..very funny stuff, but as usual you are pelting the reader with something so f*cking obvious that proves that human behavior defies logic..especially when there is a buck to be made.

When I got in the water with the dolphins last year, both of my "boys" were hiding behind my left lung. When my good lady wife volunteered to get in the pool with the 500 pound bull sea lion, I quickly surveyed the audience for a new wife to bring back to our hotel.

North Americans have a Disneyfied vision of the animal kingdom..we tend to forget that the other animals hate us and want to kill us..except for the Lemurs, whose murderous eyes cannot disguise their disdain for puny humans.

donn w2Nz said...

ps..Thanks a lot for posting the clip from ORCA.
I hope that I am able to fight the urge to re-watch ORCA..the poor baby dies...and you want the ORCA to fulfill it's murderous campaign of bloodlust and revenge and kill every person on the planet...Unlike a traditional man vs nature movie like Jaws where you were hoping that the shark doesn't eat anyone else.

Reggie said...

Male pattern baldness has been known to drive a man off the edge; not to mention a goddamned killer whale.

I just don't understand why people are surprised when a wild animal acts........wild. I mean it's not like they're puppies or kittens. Killer Whales....kill. Just like lions and tigers and bears. So why are people surprised when they kill? Because people are stupid, that's why.

One things for sure, Seal is definitely uglier than the killer whale.

Fat Sparrow said...

I have learned my lessons with raccoons and squirrels in real life. I'd like to take a whole passel of them there critters and drop them into a Disney screenwriters/animators studio and see the wacky fun that ensues. It's not bad enough that our animal shelters are flooded with tons of child-inappropriate Disney-touted critters every time they release a movie (e.g., Dalmatians, Chihuahuas) and Disney is single-handedly pigeon-holing (have I used enough dashes yet? I'm trying to meet my quota) our children into strictly defined girl=princess, boy=not princess roles, but then when you have people who want to believe, and pay for it, well...

I went to Sea World down in San Diego when I was 8, and I remember the huge contrast between the trained animals there, and the sea lions in the harbor on the Harbor Cruise. At the Sea World show, I was one of the "lucky" kids that got picked to come down and feed fish to the sea lions in the show. On the Harbor Cruise, we were specifically warned not to go anywhere near the sea lions in the harbor, as they would happily fuck you up just for laughs. They didn't really need to warn me as I had already gotten a "kiss" from the sea lion in the show and that is what I imagine Paris Hilton's snatch to smell like. The horror, the horror.

Ha, WV is "peeta."

northern musings said...

Brilliant KnĂștur. I actually ate a whale I liked the other day - taste wise that is. It was pickled blubber and twas rather tasty. Having now had both fresh and cured I definitely think that it is better to give the meat to the japanese and keep the blubbler for us. Afterall we will soon be ostrasized (you know what I mean too late can´t spell) by the rest of the world so whale blubber will be on the menu 5 nights a week...