Thursday, 17 December 2009

Tips To Stay Young Looking

I'm sick of all the emails saying: "Old Knudsen you haven't been churning out blog posts 2 or 3 times a day what have you been doing?" Well if it was any of yer frucking business ya fudge rockets I may tell ya. Ok I will tell ya because theres a commercial break in the CSI Winnipeg marathon. I just love that guy who plays yon fella in the show.

Old Knudsen has been doing :

Some major behind the scenes work

Exploring doon under and diving for muffs

Bird watching .................. Great Tits!

And buggering old lady men over wheelie bins

I looked at the old lady men and thought, 'If I don't look after meself I'll start to look old'. Yes Old Knudsen does think that song is about him.

Then there was the week when this was the best he could pick up, me self esteem really dropped.

A new product as sold by the doctor who gives me my buttocks injections. Scrapped from the sweating skin of a ghey Bavarian peasant and mixed into some cheap lead based moisturiser from China this miracle cream keeps me looking young and vibrant.

Dr B.King will make you feel like you've never felt before.

Then there is the stand by, eating cock ........................................................ roaches.

I hire myself out to rid people of their Cockroach problems and at the same time I increase my youth and vitality. Think about it. They will one day inherit the earth so if I'm alive at the end of the nuclear holocaust I will be their Overlord it all makes perfect sense after I mix me medications.

Old Knudsen can already go three months without food and a month without water, he can fit into most entry points there is no keeping him out, he can survive freezing temperatures well I am a Scot we wear skirts with out Claymores swinging freely.
Old Knudsen loves radiation as it keeps his complexion glowing, and he molts constantly which is a big funt you to Head and Shoulders.
Old Knudsen's copulation can be prolonged but everyone who reads this blog knows that. Old Knudsen gives off an offensive odor and spreads germs ......... nothing new there.

Crunchy on the outside chewy in the middle

Yes it is a fool proof plan to stay young looking and invincible. For other tips on voodoo, wetworks, water sports and beauty buy my book.

Yes I always have something on the go and while Old Knudsen has given up swearing he keeps it real in his books.

Goodbye you rag weed whackers until I bless you again with a post.


MJ said...

If I apply the sweating skin of a straight Franconian instead of a ghey Bavarian, will it have the same effect?

Old Knudsen said...

yer just mad, anyway there are no straight Franconians.

Anonymous said...

Franconian sweat is stuffed with manly hormons, would be shock for them scottish sheepshaggers, let'em have the soft edition.

CSI Seattle said...

Hi Soren, haven't visited your blog in a while. Now I remember why. You're kinda like an old girlfriend, after six months, I can't remember why I broke up with them.

BTW- did you record the CSI Winnipeg marathon? I may have to come over and watch that. I sure don't want to throw up on my own carpet.

Reggie said...

You're one helluva human being, I want to be just like you when I grow up!!!