Saturday 21 November 2009

Old Knudsen Hates 98% Of Hollywood

The above picture is a spoof from the film 'How to lose friends and alienate people' it would be funnier if it wasn't so terribly true. You just know some producer wants to remake Gandhi with Vin Diesel in the starring role or do Wolverine............. the teenage years. Not sure how they could do the later but sense and reason has never stopped them before.

Comic Strip Presents was a brilliant series on British TV that has only been bettered by the likes of Father Ted.
In 1988 they made Strike the story of the miners strike in the 80's and brought to a Hollywood studio by a no-name writer hoping to get the miner's struggle up on the big screen. Contracts are signed and much to the writer's objections some changes are made.
Al Pacino (played by Peter Richardson) as the National Union of Mineworkers leader Arthur Scargill, and Meryl Streep (Jennifer Saunders) as his wife. Strike soon spiraled out of control with gunfights and a motorcycle ride similar to The great escape.

In the time of alternate comedy that struck a bone with us who had blisters at wanking to Benny Hill as its not like you'd be laughing at it.

I find shows with canned laughter offensive as its like telling you its funny when you should already know it.

Alternate comedy has gone mainstream and why? Americans thats why they want to turn the world mainstream. Posing vampires, animated violence and terminator toys for children, how slutty can we make barbie look today? Zoe 101 and Hannah Montana are cockasidal maniacs, cum to Disneyland ride on Mickey's unicorn.

Here is how Al Pacino was portrayed as looking like in Strike as Arthur Scargill .


Here is Arthur Scargill with his shredded wheat comb over.


Kevin Costner as Robin Hood.......... he just looks so British and the accent, "Yo welcome to Nottinghame forest, we shall attack once my hair has been done."


Any other history you want to fuck with Hollywood? What about the brave and the bold Oliver Cromwell who defeated the devil worshiping cannibalistic Irish that killed their own weemen and children thus having history blame it on him?

"Why damn you why?" as he shakes his fists at the sky as it rains doon heavily, " They were innocent."

"My good fellow, paint me as I am beauty spots and all."


Well I'm off to watch Braveheart again as that is obviously totally true.

5 comments:

The Mistress said...

cannibalistic Irish

I enjoy Irishmen eating me.

Shelly Rayedeane said...

I think the word hate is pretty harsh. However, I do think most of the people in Hollywood have the mark of the beast in their head. lol.

h said...

You smell bad. Take a shower. A long one. With soap, this time.

Romeo Morningwood said...

Thank you for the depth and wisdom of your insights. Points well taken.
I've noticed the comedic shift in the US..a generational thing..the slacker stoner is back big time but Hollywood makes movies for 20 year olds. They don't care about us anymore. Anyway the FPS game Call Of Duty sold $500M worth of product in the first 5 days! Nobody believed me when I said that Games are going to kick Hollywood's ass.

Did you see the Forbes list of the most overpaid and underpaid actors..what a riot.
I'd blog about it but..meh..worth a read though.

Romeo Morningwood said...

I would have picked Gene Wilder to play Arthur Bloody Scargill...
dead ringer he iz!