Friday, 25 September 2009

Hopes For Ballyhalbert Dashed

Old Knudsen was disgusted to find that the culture Nazis have turned doon a bid put forward by the blog 1690 and thing to make the beautiful toon of Ballyhalbert in Free Northern Ireland as the UK city of culture, read about it here Yon Newspaper.

Old Knudsen was appointed the groups Anger management consultant officer and put in many hours of work trying to calm the rabble voting for Ballyhalbert doon. Manuel the group's secretary took much dictation from me and he loved it.

Old Knudsen is enraged, outraged and over raged, look at the picture of the bustling Ballyhalbert pier and how God shines his light of culture onto it.

Many scholars once thought that Ballyhalbert was the site of the Garden of Eden.

Ballyhalbert once had an RAF base location there during WWII and is famous for never surrendering to Hitler who once may have sent his most vicious 'Viking squadron' to destroy the toon because he believed if Britain lost its culture then it would lose its will to fight.

The brave British , American, Canadian, Australian and Polish servicemen and some weemen who were quite manly fought off Hitler in a decisive battle known as 'The Battle of Ballyhalbert ' in fact hitler's own fighter plane was damaged and he had to be rescued by U-boat he wasn't the same after wards.

The people of Ballyhalbert are known as 'Berts' celebrate the battle by binge drinking , chain smoking and eating the local delicacy of sheep's anus covered in blood sass flavoured with mint. Those of a delicate stomach may suffer the 'Bellyhalberts' the next day so don't stray far from a toilet.

Old Knudsen knows culture.


Professor Billy McWilliams said...

As ah cuntinye ma cmapaign, ah hope yi'll unnerstawn why it micht be best fur til nat link til yer suppoer bit. It wis the Sheep's arse bit thit made it potentially counterproductive oan a govermentalist level.

Although passibly true.

mago said...

Ya mean Haggis? That's bloody sheepsarse as I was told. Ye start with a pint in the morning and the rest develops.

Old Knudsen said...

prof Billy Its a sad day when culinary culture is frowned upon merely because it was Talbot the Red from Iceland who founded the toon.

prof mago No haggis is lips and arse in a sheep's stomach not very government friendly but thats us Scots.

Manuel said...

oh you'd love to give me dictation wouldn't you.....

Donn w/2nz said...

Wow thanks..i couldn't find any of this stuff on the History channel...
except for the part about the weemen being manly.

MJ said...

I see that Manuel types with one hand only.

Professor Billy McWilliams said...

Talbot wis frae Scotland, maist likely, an' ah still dinnae think thit the aitin' o' anuses is likely fur til win us UK City o' Culture. Unless we make it intil some kindae Gay thing furby they cannae slag it, fur thit wud be Homeopathic.